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Date Posted: 12:01:07 11/04/08 Tue
Author: retired military wife
Subject: I don't excuse Frank's behavior... I could rant about the wrong doings of both Frank and Denise...and for that matter the behavior of the people they are involved with....(inside)
In reply to: retired military wife 's message, "A hit, a miss, and other impressions about the season finale" on 13:38:46 11/03/08 Mon

Both Mac and Jordanna know that Frank and Denise are married, separated or not. And among the finger pointing some finger shaking must fall on them as well.

If a guy opens up and says he's feeling wounded because his marriage is in trouble, I wouldn't be inviting him to my tent for coffee..and then kiss him when he got there.

My all means Frank should have pulled away. And yes, I did notice the location this time and agree that it was not that once in her tent, but is now a full fledged, no excuses affair. And yes, I do put blame on Frank for getting caught up in it. He preaches strenghth of character to his son, but is a weak man himself - another strike against his conduct.

Mac in the case of Denise is the same kind of thing. He complimented, and then to some degree took advantage to get things started. Does that disolve Denise of blame and shoulder her share of the responsibility - Hell no!

Ultimately, regardless of the cause of either of their temptations, both Denise and Frank are guilty of cheating and have to take responsibility for their actions in order to move forward, whether it be together or apart.

I wasn't trying to say that I believed Frank was innocent or it was okay for him and not Denise.

I do in terms of the show's writing link Frank's behavior with the Denise storyline and therefore included it in the statement that Denise's storyline was a trainwreck.

In the future I will keep my thoughts to myself. I don't get the impression that this militarty wife's opinions are welcome here.

I feel properly chastised and will confine myself to quarters immediately.

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Replies:

[> [> That's not true about your opinions not being welcomed....people have a differing opinion than yours, that doesn't mean either of us are right or wrong. They are just that, opinions. I apologize if that's how you feel, that certainly wasn't the intent. Even though I may not agree, I do like reading other POV's on things, because we are all individuals & we aren't going to see situations the same way or agree all the time. That would be boring, LOL! Like I said, I'm just tired of all the Denise bashing. Of course she was wrong, no question about it. Both chose to have a sexual affair once they were separated (Ghetti wasn't an affair IMHO), & its just discouraging to see Denise get bashed for it while glossing over the fact that Frank has done exactly the same thing. -- Jennifer, 13:20:34 11/04/08 Tue [1]

It just seems as though there is a complete different standard between if a man cheats and if a woman cheats...cheating is cheating! Its wrong, and both parties are guilty of it. Heck Roland wasn't hammered near as hard as Denise has been getting, and its just troublesome that again she gets slammed unmercifully while her husband has done EXACTLY the same thing (and was caught by their son) and its glossed over. That's all I was trying to say...

Again my apologies, I hope you will continue to offer your opinion :)


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[> [> Let me ask you this....what, if anything, should happen to Frank because he's conducted his affair with someone in his unit, while on duty in Iraq? Can he be charged, or is that just a myth? I believe they are of the same rank, so not sure if fraternization applies. I just don't want anything to happen to Jeremy, as much as I hate Frank I wouldn't wish that upon my worst enemy, i.e. getting caught by your son & then having something happen to your son, the guilt would be pretty heavy IMHO. -- Jennifer, 13:26:57 11/04/08 Tue [1]


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[> [> [> I will not comment about Frank as to my beliefs on what, if anything should happen to Frank, but I'll ask your question about conduct/charges... -- retired military wife, 14:00:04 11/04/08 Tue [1]

We've been out for a number of years so something may have changed, but I think it is basically still the same.

If Frank and Jordanna are of the same level (officers) and not in the same direct chain of command, which given that she has a different rate (job) than Frank that is likely to be the case there is no issue with them being involved from that standpoint. In civilain terms, you might sleep with your friend's secretary, but if you have no control over her assignments or reviews for raise or promotion it may not be a good idea, but - depending on company policy -may not be grounds for disciplinary action.

However, there is a law against adultery in the miltary. It is often not prosecuted, but it is in the book.

Why he probably would not be charged or the charges dismissed without punishment?

Here is the answer:

Frank is separated. He has a witness to that effect, the chaplain that he and Denise saw when she said she wanted a separation. Given that, and the fact he's in a war zone (no double standard here, it would be the case if it were a female officer in Frank's place)they most likely would dismiss any charges, even if they were filed in the first place.

I know that doesn't give you my opinion, but I hope it answers your question in regards to what if any charges could be filed.

I did take it a step further and tried to explain why the charges in Frank's case, in particular, it probably would not happen in the real military, but I have no idea what the writers have in store for him.


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[> [> Hope you stick around military wife. I think people focus more on Denise because she is the main character and is calling the shots as to how this separation will go. Frank is no saint here. The way he has been written leaves the door open for the sympathy vote even if he was the catalyst that started Denise's carefree behaviour. When I saw an intelligent professional person like Denise asking Mac where they should go from here and acting like a infatuated teenager, I thought this is just so lame. I optimistically hoped their counselling would lead to something fruitful. Alas any true mature theme that showed the compromise necessary to maintain a long distance marriage afloat would take intelligent writing. It is just so much easier to let everyone sleep around. Pathetic! -- Jubellant, 14:36:34 11/04/08 Tue [1]


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