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Date Posted: 14:48:56 11/11/05 Fri
Author: Halzay(Elizabeth) and Salzay
Subject: Continuing thread up here.... S'peer!

((Re-posting all my wonderful threads up where we can find them...))

Halzay’s amber gaze narrowed slightly in a slight fear and suspicion, but she never once interrupted him. While she might fear him, that would not stop her from being polite. She stroked Sally’s hair absent mindedly, and the toddler was looking at S’peer with sweet, child-like interest. However, when S’peer said ‘beach’, Salzay spoke before Halzay could open her mouth.

“Beach!” She said happily, clapping with a laugh. She looked up at Halzay with big, watery, begging eyes. “Oh, Mommy.... pwease? I wanna go a beach! Beach! Swimmy!” She laughed again. “Daddy no let me dieded... wight?”(Daddy won’t let me die... right?) She looked over at S’peer hopefully. Again the girl was showing off her child-like innocence: why should she be nervous about his man she hardly knew? No one hurt other people, right?

“Sally,” Halzay said firmly before S’peer had time to answer. Salzay looked at her mother, and frowned with another “Pwease?”. Halzay struggled to remain firm, but lost heart, and sighed. She looked from Salzay’s begging face to S’peer’s. Oh, how she wished things hadn’t turned so complicated!

“S’peer...” she said softly, making sure her voice remained unflinching despite her phobia of the man. “You shouldn’t have said beach. She’s learning to swim.” She gestured to the baby, who was pushing imaginary water away from her face and holding her breath. It was really a hilarious sight, but apparently the mother had had many laughs on it already, because she remained calm, if slightly apprehensive. “Anyway...” the look on her face suggested she was deep in thought, Truthfully, she didn’t want her child around this man, but... part of her was still the old Hally, the girl who believed that everyone deserved a second chance.

She wanted to give S’peer the smallest possible second chance—which would be to let him see his daughter. But... she didn’t trust her daughter with him! She hadn’t known him at the time of the rape, much less now. So the only possible solution was—

‘Oh shards...’

“Well...” She began, swallowing a bit of bile that had formed in her mouth. “Maybe we could... all go... sometime...”

Sally clapped excitedly. “Yay! Mommy and Sawwy go beach! And Daddy!” She laughed happily. Judging by the uncomfortable look on Halzay’s face, she wasn’t too elated.... but, it was the only fair way, even if it did tear her heart out. Again.

“Oh, Hally...”14-turn-old (non-rider as of now) Elaini’s arm was wrapped around her 16-turn-old of a best friend, pulling her closer into a comforting hug. Her friend’s stomach had swelled considerably now, and there was no hiding it—she was pregnant, and pretty far in now. “Hal, why didn’t you say something? We could’ve gone back, demanded he take care of you—”
“No!” Suddenly, more sobs escaped the poor girl, and she shuddered violently. Though it had been months, she could still feel that man’s touch, hear her own screaming, feel her own tears drowning her as the rider refused to leave her be...
“You want us to kill him for you?” Elaini’s 11-turn-old little brother asked, bringing his fist into his other hand. When Halzay shook her head violently, the boy frowned, dropping his hands. “Aw, c’mon... you gotta buck up... maybe Pa will let you ride Sentra!” Kaji was referring to the gentlest mare runnerbeast the family owned, whom he had grown fond of.
“Kaji!” Elaini whispered frantically. “Her condition!”
“Oh, yeah...” The boy frowned as Halzay dug her face in her hands. “Aw, c’mon... tell you what, I’ll go back, and yell at him for ya. Then... I can get him to at least give you some supplies for the baby!”
“You’re not helping,” ‘Laini said, trying to comfort Hally. “Oh, c’mon, Hal... maybe we can help. And we’ll get Ben, and Tat, too. How’s that sound?”
Halzay slowly nodded. She hadn’t said anything besides that one “No!” in days... and apparently, the thought of seeing her brothers didn’t improve this.

She wouldn’t talk again after this... up until Salzay’s birth. When asked, months later, what the baby would be named, everyone feared she would remain in her vow of silence, but then her voice came back, as smooth and soprano as ever.
“She’s Salzay.” And then she was no longer afraid to talk, but still broken. Only raising a baby would let her live, and it was painfully obvious to her family and friends.

Of course, Halzay had spoken again, eventually. But then, Elaini was taken to the Weyrs, Kaji had to work at the barn, and her brother had to keep their dragons and wings in check. She had mainly raised Sally alone... which was why Sally only let Mommy hold her.

Green Elizabeth had her mind pressed gently to Halzay’s, keeping a mental connection to help keep her sane. Deciding to intervene as little as necessary, she had been quiet, but now she spoke to Scarth.

{Tell yours that she really is trying... she’s just frightened. She keeps remembering... well, you know...}

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