One of the main reasons...I get so sad! -- Castaways

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Date Posted: 01:35:05 04/03/02 Wed
Author: Rhonda K
Author Host/IP: 216.66.152.176
Subject:

One of the main reasons...I get so sad!

http://www.geocities.com/scartlady/ar09000.html

Thanks for replying to my post. I really needed to see that I still have a place to come. I knew 2 months ago I was being laid off...but kept hoping that something would come up. I applied for everything I could, while I was employed, but so far..nothing.

Lynn, has been a part of me since I was 23. I fell in love with him on first sight...and love him still. His life, was plagued with alcoholism, depression and anxiety. Some days, I think I almost hate him, for giving up...but fighting the same fight..of depression and anxiety...I know that pain. I also know my thought process when I think of doing the same thing. For me, suicide is not an option, but not too long ago...it seemed to be the only one.

I miss him. He used to make me laugh. I am not regretting my life, since his death. But I still wish he was there to pick up the phone.

I am trying very hard to be strong, but I also know, that being without work..is hard for me to deal with. My meds will have to be increased yet again. 2 years ago, I was a Superintendent...now I am applying for administrative support position...because I lack the desire and the self esteem...to go for anything else. This disease...just keeps testing me..I really don't know, how well I am going to do this time.

I love this board, this site...without it I would be at a total loss.

I am venting tonight...deep down, I know I will be ok., but you all know that fears that plague us during times like this.

I will be around.

HUGS...MUH MUH MUH..if you dont see me online, or hear from me..please don't take it personally, it probably just means I have buried myself under the covers and not willing to get online.

Love you guys lots...

Rhonda K

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Replies:

To Rhonda -- Bill, 06:31:53 04/03/02 Wed
- Bill...you always know the right thing to say..MUH MUH -- Rhonda K, 13:26:03 04/03/02 Wed
Re: One of the main reasons...I get so sad! -- Scott, 18:00:50 04/03/02 Wed
Re: One of the main reasons...I get so sad! -- TexDon, 20:50:04 04/03/02 Wed
Re: One of the main reasons...I get so sad! -- gem, 00:42:36 04/04/02 Thu
- Oh Gem...you are missed. -- Rhonda K, 12:57:55 04/04/02 Thu
  - ReThanks Rhonda...... -- gem, 01:08:22 04/06/02 Sat
Re: One of the main reasons...I get so sad! -- seth, 01:38:20 05/07/02 Tue

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