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Date Posted: 20/08/06 10:29am
Author: Mortimer Crumbcake (Panexa, Is it right for anyone?)
Subject: Re: News Report (Healthy Lifestyle)
In reply to:
Dr Arnold Wenslydale Shah-MacDonald; RADA; VGC
's message,
"News Report (Healthy Lifestyle)" on
19/08/06 10:43pm
My good Sir, Dr Arnold Wenslydale Shah-MacDonald; RADA; VGC
Your report raises a few questions both of methodology and ethics!
You state "When the triebespeople were fed on bread, water, and 1 kilo of opium per day thay felt hardly any pain at all."
Was this based on the standard clinical scale of 1 to 10, (10 being please kill me now), was the bread whole grain or bleached flour and since the tribespeople of the Whoopawhoo rainforest get rained on all the time it is a known fact they hardly ever drink water, lastly you failed to mention the purity of the opium. All of these factors could have a margin of error of at least 40% +/- 39%.
You also state "When fed on bread, water, and a placibo in place of the opium the tribespeople felt pain when poked in the eye with a blunt object."
I find that without the data for mass and velocity in your report it is hard to evaluate the results. If you had just used the Blunt Object Index (BOI) as developed by Scotland Yard in 1927 perhaps your data would make some sense. As is clearly stated in the BOI as I am sure you are aware, the scale goes from " #1-Fireplace Poker", "#2-Claw Hammer", "#3-Glass Ashtray", "#4-Candelstick", "#5 -Large Bronze Statuette", "#6-Large Ceramic Urn", "#7- Porcelain Urinal", "#8- Claw Foot Bathtub", "#9- Frozen Leg of Kangaroo" and lastly "#10 Lorry Tyre".
I further feel you should have had a control group, which should have been given only sublingual tablets of Panexa™, this would have flushed out the test subjects who only were there for the bread and opium.
Sincerely,
Mortimer Crumbcake
Senior Sales Representative
MERD Pharmaceutical Group.
"Third World Sales Our Specialty"
Formerly of-
"Bedbeger International
Industrial Supply Sales
Nottingham Region"
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