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Date Posted: 30/06/06 2:16am
Author: Habidi Azzizi
Subject: Habidi Azzizi's Online Air Guitar Emporium


Announcing the opening of my new Air Guitar Emporium.

Selling only finest handmade air guitars.

We have products from all over the world, including rare units fashioned by the monks of distant himalayan monasteries.

All of our products feature -
* The latest technology
* Compatibility with a wide range of electronic music standards
* High quality tensile strings that never break
* Easy portability
* Comfortable shoulder straps
* A full range of colours and designs
* Easy playbility for instant rock star fame
* Durable - can be thrown around

We do not stock cheap Chinese made rip offs of the genuine article, though they can be ordered here. All units feature a numbered certificate of authenticity.

We ship world wide and guarantee delivery undamaged.

So come on in and take advantage of our opening sale!

Habidi Azzizi

(Any women unable to control themselves in my presence can contact me privately at my Air Guitar Emporium, where I will consider them for my harem)

(no relation to "Hamidi Azzizi", aka "The Dog Castrater" aka "Sharp Teeth Hamidi" aka "The Dog Testicle Collector" aka "The Sausage Maker")

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Replies:

[> Quality Sausages Available -- Hamidi Azzizi, 30/06/06 2:19am


Good luck with your new business, cousin.

I would like to make your customers aware of my fine sausage products, made from only the best quality meats. They make a find gift and we can send them internationally, though we cannot guarantee freshness if the weather is hot.

So come on in, bring your pet, and we'll see what we can make out of them.

Hamidi Azzizi


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[> [> Employment opportunity -- MFCC, 30/06/06 2:22am


Hamidi,

Kind and Caring Problem Solvers, currently have position vacant that I feel would fit a person of your obvious talents. Sharp teeth and familiarity with genitals are skills that are often underestimated.

Contact me via this forum if interested.

MFCC


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[> [> [> Re: Employment opportunity -- Hamidi Azzizi, 30/06/06 2:35am


MFCC,

I would be proud to join your firm, if you could meet the following conditions -

1. Undertake to market my new range of meat pies - I have tapped an unexploited sector of the meat market which has a distinctive flavour that I believe would appeal to everyone. I thought I might call this brand "Testy's Meat Pies"
2. You agree to provide accommodation for me and my extended family. There are twenty two of us altogether.

Hamidi


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[> [> [> [> Re: Employment opportunity -- Ivor Snouteworthy, 30/06/06 11:40am

Please allow me to introduce myself once again. My name is Ivor Snouteworthy, I represent the Royal National Society For Butting In To Other Peoples Business, (R.N.S.B.I.T.O.P.B.).
You`re obviously having problems finding the right staff, I know of a very good employment agency "Snouteworthy`s* Staff Resources" (*No relation:-). Please don`t hesitate to contact me if you need temporary or full time staff, our rates are very competitive and we can have one of our placements with you in the blink of a hummingbird`s eye.


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[> Re: Habidi Azzizi's Online Air Guitar Emporium -- Fernando Luis Domegnaz-Lopez, 30/06/06 10:15pm

Habidi,

I seem to need more air for my Guitar, it was a Specially built Spanish model and I would hate to ruin the tone and inflection should I put the wrong type of air in it. All we have here is local Leeds air from the petrol station pump. I contacted the Royal Automobile Club and they told me air is air but then what do they know about Specially built Spanish air guitars!

Fernando Luis Domegnaz-Lopez
Available for weddings, bat mitzvah and Scottish sheep shearing rituals. Reggae, traditional and rock and roll with a Spanish flair


[ Edit | View ]


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