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For the smell of fear tonight
Wakes an ancient lust that will not be denied...
You're mine
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If there was anything from his time spent being alive that Erich drew pride from, it was the service he'd given to his country. He'd climbed the ranks quickly, quickly proving himself to be a viable opponent to any enemy that dare cross his path. His strong intellect and harsh persona had secured him his position in intel at a very, very young age...too young, most would say. That moment had been the crossroad in his life, the trail head to the path that had lead him to the trails and successes that had shaped him into the infallible agent and killer he'd become. He'd survived some of the cruelest torture the human body could endure...had come out stronger because of it, in fact. And later, when he'd been paired with a young and promising blonde spy...they had been an unstoppable team. Legendary, even. Erich knew that their country would never be able to train nor find a team as good as the one they'd lost...but he felt no pity. They had had a hand in it, after all. If they had only searched, only attempted some sort of backup...
Her words drew a shake of his blond head. "No one be too strong for death, for this is death also." Death of one's own humanity was perhaps even harder to process than the death of the body, he presumed. "Only this death, it never ends. Hell, true hell. An eternity of suffering. Nonexistence be a blessing for me, if I had a choice." His dominus had selected him because of his brute strength, the allure of the benefits associated with his possible allegiance. Neither the entity nor Erich himself could have ever anticipated just how badly the transformation would go...just how wrong the result would be.
The soul-taking had been one of the many things that had gone wrong during his change. He hadn't been aware of it until much later, after he'd fled the city--but it had been there, all the same. The first time he'd withered a person to a sunken and soulless shell had been horrifying to the ex-spy--the result of such a parasitic action was not a pretty sight. At the same time, he had never felt so vital...so full...and he'd hated himself for it. Erich still didn't know why his change had gone so wrong...and he had a feeling it would remain a mystery. No matter the cause, he'd not just changed into a supernatural being...he'd been made into a monster.
He could not help the rage that engulfed him, the prospect of her changed instead of him too much for him to bear. He had known the change had been meant for the both of him, but the only thing that had given him even a shred of dignity in this hellish existence had been the knowledge that he'd kept this fate from touching her. If he hadn't been able to save her--Erich didn't think he'd have been able to hold on to his humanity this long. He would have surrendered to the beast and it's desires long, long ago. "All I've had these years to take refuge in was the knowledge that you remained alive. Truly alive. For you to take the curse would be akin to letting this beast have it's way. Do you naught see what your life is worth? You cherish it!" He felt equally as helpless as she, unable to make her see the gift she had--how precious it truly was. The ability to die was viewed as a curse to many a human--but oh, when that right was ripped away, one came to miss the option of having rest at the end of the road, when all was said and done. There'd be no rest, no peace for Erich.
Life was as much of a fragile thing as it was precious, and he knew all too well how easily hers could be stolen and changed. Even as badly as he wanted her blood, he knew he would fight any being that even thought of attempting such a theft. While he was no expert in the supernatural way of living, he did know that he had his training as a human, paired with his mass and strength would make him a natural threat to many. As was his way, he would not hesitate to employ those things. "Pity to those that try." He growled lowly, blue gaze ablaze. "Nor have I stopped the fight, comrade. It is not my way to take a loss. For as long as I stand, even in this undeath--I will fight this monster. Defeat, as they say...is not an option." It never had been, not for Erich...and it wasn't about to begin to be.
Happiness was an unattainable thing, he'd come to find. Humans pursued it relentlessly, an only achieved it in brief bouts. Erich found it to be a horrible waste of resources. If one could tolerate the aspects of their life--that was enough. He would not seek happiness in a partner, either--to do so was to invest too much power in that other person. Power that could be used negatively, in some cases. He'd always viewed others as a means of escape--a way to disconnect himself from the cold creature he had always been....and nothing more. Such was probably the cause for him being a violent lover. "Wrong? Look at me, Cammie. See how the beast fights! See the death it in it's eyes! It doesn't hesitate...young, old, male, female...all the same. None deserve a creature like that." His own voice has raised a decibel or two in response, so adamant he was on the situation. He would no deny himself the physical pleasures of another, if the opportunity arose--eternity was a long time to be without a mate, after all--but he'd do no more than that. He couldn't expect another to babysit him, to wait for the next time he'd have to go a round with the monster. Perhaps one day, if Erich was lucky, he'd be able to fully control it himself. He desperately hoped for such.
He watched her process his response, then formulate an answer to his return question. He was mildly surprised at what she had to say--the bitterness in her voice as she spoke of being wronged by their mother country as well. Anger kindled in him, a slow but ever-steady burn--his natural reaction when their government was the topic of conversation. Russia had wronged him--he had not been aware that she'd wronged Cammie too, and the fact that they had was somehow even more infuriating. Such a tragic thing that the two best allies a country could have were treated with such a lack of respect. "Why hast they disowned you?" Cammie had always been fiercely loyal to the homeland, to her job--the prospect of them turning their backs on her was profoundly unsettling. "Though it is a comfort of sorts, to know it is not I you'll hunt. Such an inconvenience that would be." In truth, Erich realized if she had been in the business of hunting him--he would likely have put up little fight. Cammie being successful in the hunt also meant the death he would so welcome. Too bad.
"I know naught. For ten years, I be trying to control this beast. Perhaps I have learned all I can...perhaps it does not get better than this." He made a motion at himself, meaning the beast within and his control tactics. "I wish to find why my change went wrong. The dominius...he was a pedigreed leech. No half breed, no hybrid. Why then, am I what I am?" He give a very slight and very brief shrug of his massive shoulders. "I will inflict my revenge on the dominus. For leaving there, writhing in pain and waiting for a death that would never come." He said this with a stone-cold certainty, icy eyes blazing at the prospect. "And then...perhaps eventually I will seek death. Surely, it cannot be out of reach completely. I am tired of this world, this life. The end of me means the end of it--the beast--...and what better revenge than that?"
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For the animal's soul is mine
We will be completed right before your eyes
I have no control this time
And now we both shall dine in hell tonight
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