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Subject: Why is the pain not going away?


Author:
Lor (Unhappy)
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Date Posted: 14:37:16 11/28/07 Wed
 Here's my story. I'm now 2 years post abortion(I was then 25 years old..now 27) and because I didn't think I could "Afford" to raise a child, I chose to abort. I was very selfish for letting others "talk me into the abortion" and I then said to myself that this is o.k. to do. My partner(I am still with and going to marry next year) doesn't want to talk about it and I "feel" the blame. Why did I let my partner and my own mother talk me into this? why didn't they think I could have raise the child? Did they think soo little of me and didn't think I could have means and ways to raise the child? I am soo angry, sad and very lonely. I have turned to drinking(binge), I know I'm depressed and I seem to just not care any more. The sad part of all of this is that my partner that knocked me up is the one I'm marrying and says "we will have a family some day"...like this never happened. What is up with that..like it was o.k. to knock me up then not take responsiblity for that and then in the future knock me up and then take care of that child. I just want to know if the pain is ever going to go away or am I stuck with this forever with my partner?
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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: Why is the pain not going away?


Author:
Kris
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Date Posted: 08:54:52 11/29/07 Thu
Dear Lor,

You ask if the pain is ever going to go away or are you going to be stuck like this forever. Well, in all honesty, that choice is up to you. Happiness and forgiveness is a choice you make. You are seeking healing from your abortion - and it is critical that you find it.

Starting with a post-abortion counseling group would be the best thing you could do. Please check this site:

http://www.optionline.org/hadabortion.html

Find a center near you and call and go to thier post-abortion FREE counseling sessions.

You can also visit this site:

http://www.safehavenministries.com/

You need to find a healthy way to heal from this pain - binge drinking is only a temporary numbing of your pain, and it will only lead to worse problems in your life. You need to forgive yourself, as God to forgive you and forgive your partner (and mom). Guys are usually better at "stuffing" their feelings, but I'm sure he's hurting too.

Please do not put this aside - as is so easy to do when facing a difficult situation.

Hang in there -

Kris

[> Subject: Re: Why is the pain not going away?


Author:
Kim
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Date Posted: 21:40:17 11/29/07 Thu
hi, I wanted to tell you that I can realate to your story. I am 24 years old and I had an abortion 5 years ago. I married the man that got got me pregnant 3 years ago. I was against having an abortion when I found out I was preg but I let my then boyfriend, convinced me that we couldnt afford a baby, and that he wasnt ready. After much fighting I gave in. I resent him somtimes. The pain is still here, it comes and goes. right now I am upset, that is why I am searching post abortion sights. I need to talk to someone who can relate to my story. I am a manager of a store and my assistant has just found out she is preg. She is excited, but things like this trigger my pain. My husband still isnt ready for a baby. Anyway...
[> Subject: Re: Why is the pain not going away?


Author:
A very depressed person (hopeful)
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Date Posted: 23:13:01 01/14/08 Mon
I can't answer your questions, but I chose that too. If you'd like, I can be your listener, and maybe go through this pain with you. You are NOT alone.
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