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Subject: A terrible story


Author:
Kim (sad)
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Date Posted: 08:51:37 11/30/07 Fri

I had let my boyfriend convince me 5 years ago to have an abortion. We were young, 19 and 20, and he wasnt ready to be a father, and I dont think I was ready to be a mother. Anyway, I went to the clinic and used the "pill" method of termination which was still fairly new then. They said I was exactly 9 weeks. The doctor at the clinic told me that after inserting the pills into my body in 24 hours I would get my period, and that I wouldnt notice the actual passing of the fetus. Well 24 hours later I inserted the pills and waited. I had horrible cramping and only a little bleeding. 8 hours later I went to go to the bathroom, and when I sat down I felt something come out. When I looked there was a fully intact fetus, in a clear sac about the size of a half dollar, connected to the umbillical cord and a fully intact placenta attched to that. I could see its features, fingers and toes... I was mortified and I can still see that image as clear as day. When I told the clinic they said they had only heard of that happening 1 other time and that they were sorry. SORRY!!!! I feel horrible still now and have a hard time. Things trigger my sadness, a preg coworker, a preg friend, babies on TV, every Nov, because that is when I concieved, and every Jan, because that is when I aborted. Please give me some advice. I never wanted to do it, but I did. Now I want to have a baby, my husband isnt ready, but since my coworker just found out she is, I keep thinking that it should be me, because I want to be, and of course because it is Nov. I am not religous, but I still feel like I am being punished. Help!!

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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: A terrible story


Author:
Kris
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Date Posted: 22:42:00 11/30/07 Fri

Dear Kim,

I am so sorry for your loss. What a traumatic experience that must have been. I'm glad you posted here and I want to encourage you and say that it took a lot of courage to just write down what you did.

Wanting to heal and move on emotionally is very important. This site can be a little quiet - but here is another one for you to check out:

www.safehavenminitries.com

You can also visit this site:

http://www.optionline.org/hadabortion.html

Many of the centers affiliated with that site offer FREE post-abortion counseling, something you really should seek out.

Finding a way to heal completely would be very important before you start a family.

Hugs,
Kris


[> Subject: To long


Author:
Mari (sad and mad at the same time.)
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Date Posted: 16:00:36 12/06/07 Thu

Hi My boyfriend and I have only been together for 3 1/2 years. I got pregnant the first time on July 18, 2004 after only knowing my guy for only 3 months. I had my first ultrasound in september of that year I was 6 weeks pregnant and my son was born on April 06, 2005. After I had my son 6 weeks later me and my boyfriend were having sex again although I was on the Depo it didn't help me it just gave me high blood pressure and it physically got me sick to my stomach till this day I'm unable to use any kind of birthcontrol do to the rare side effects that I get form them. Anyway back to my story. After my son was born me and my boyfriend were having sex again 5 or 6 months later I got pregnant again and being only 21 in school and only having a part time job we decided that we couldnt have a second child and to soon. So in November of 2005 we decided to have an abortion I was 8 weeks when I aborted. Till this day we feel bad for the desicion that we made but at that time it was the right one. At first i was depressed I was missing work and eventually got fired. Now being 2 years later and my son now being 2 1/2 years old were talking about having another one in a year or 2 but I think it might be sooner i'll be able to find out in 2 weeks if I'm pregnant.

[> Subject: Re: A terrible story


Author:
Kris
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Date Posted: 08:35:36 12/10/07 Mon

Dear Mari,

Thank you for posting. I hope you will also seek out some further help in dealing with your loss. Please visit this page and check out the links:

http://www.inourmidst.com./abortion_links.htm

It would also be good for you to find a pregnancy center near you and see if they offer FREE post-abortion counseling.

http://www.optionline.org/hadabortion.html

It's important to be healthy emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Being sad and mad at the same time is not a good thing and you really should seek some further help for that.

Hugs, Kris

[> Subject: Re: A terrible story


Author:
Anonymous
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Date Posted: 23:07:20 01/14/08 Mon

Just know that you are not alone, I too have flashbacks and am mortified. If you wish to talk, feel free to. I can't solve what your feeling, but I can try to go through it with you.


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