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Date Posted: 16:50:36 01/24/02 Thu
Author: Argus (with Barry)
Subject: Getting the message across
In reply to: Laurel 's message, "Trying to communicate" on 14:27:03 01/24/02 Thu

Argus was glad to see that someone finally had the sense to get him some water. And a beautiful woman, too. He smiled at her appreciatively as he took the cup. "Ta, custy berd," he said gratefully.

The woman was certainly easy on the eyes, but when she opened her mouth to speak the fool woman spoke so slowly that he figured she must be a little touched in the head.

“Here…is…your…water,” she said. Argus stared at her, then raised the cup to his mouth, still looking at her over the rim.

“Drink it slowly,” the poor nattering soft-head said.

He was getting the hang of their speech a bit now, and he drained the cup, giving Laurel a stern look as he wiped his mouth with his hand. "Drink it slowly? Berd, ay 'aven't 'ad any wati in yer wha must be a dozun years at least! Ay am not go'n ter drink it slowly!"

He held out his cup to her. "Could ay 'uv some more, please?" He flashed her a smile that might be charming if it wasn't buried in all that hair.

Laurel looked a bit put out by this but took the cup and went to get him some more water. He looked the others over, as if sizing them up.

"So 'ow did yew find de gateway and opun it?" he said at last, addressing them collectively. "And whuz in de nine 'ells am ay?" He looked around at the oasis, the sand, the dunes. "And, fe dat matti, oo ay yew lot? Come 'ead, dun tell me dat wee moggy 'as yer terngues!"

*~*~*~*~*


The berk was ignoring Barry but that was all right with him. He figured if they wanted to know what the old addle-cove was wigwagging about they'd ask if anyone could understand him, which so far no one had.

He didn't like the idea that some slavering beasts were waiting to jump out of the mirror if the portal opened, though. "Hey, cutters..." he said, "What happens if this thing opens again and those big uglies spill out?"

The affect this had on Argus was almost funny. The dirty old berk went stiff, his eyes wide, and he whirled on the mirror saying something so objectionable that even Barry wasn't sure what it meant. "I dunno if it has the orifices for that," he mused.

Argus then ran to the mirror and frantically started kicking sand over the bottom, burying the lower gems from sight. "Bedder keep bullrag covered up. Dun want doze beasties gett'n out here. Ay dun think i'll be rezzed if dee get me e'yer." He looked at them gaping at him. "Ne yew lot, either, ay reckon."

"We're all touched by your concern," Barry said sourly.

"'Ush yew blert bone demon! Yew 'uv no idea yer wha they're like!" Argus said, his face tense. "If yew wanna see evil, blimp through dat gateway. That's yer wha evil lewks like all right. Where's dat berd with me wati?"

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