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Date Posted: 04:58:58 07/18/06 Tue
Author: Mikki
Author Host/IP: 66-227-249-218.dhcp.bycy.mi.charter.com / 66.227.249.218
Subject: Two psych appointments in one day is exhausting

I went and saw the pdoc yesterday....he messed around with my meds because I am not feeling well. Had fantasies of walking around the north end of Flint (a really bad area) hoping that someone would just kill me. I told him that,and I barely made it out of the office...he wanted to admit me again. Instead he played around with my meds and told me to call him if I got in trouble. I told him that if I felt that way again I would call him.

Then i went to see my parents for a bit....Mom has lupus now, and is really sick. My dad is just getting over strep throat. I am so glad my dad is retired now, now I can see him when I want to, and he can take care of mom. So that was a depressing visit.

Then I saw my lady therapist.....it was my third visit, and I think I am gonna stay with her. She seems to be ok with me.....has had some good things to say. I will give it some more time.

Oh and some good news. Pdoc said no way on the group for borderlines......he looked at me and said, "how many times do I have to tell you you are not borderline?" You have bipolar depression...a textbook case. Being in a group of borderlines will send me over the edge. He did give me a card of a support group for people with bipolar. He isn't real big on self help groups......he says it makes you wallow in your illness instead of moving forward. Plus it is in St. Clair, which is an hour and a half away. With gas prices the way they are....I don't want to drive as much as I used to. So I will think about it anyway.

Lets hope the med change helps.....and I don't go wandering around Flint.

Love, Mikki

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