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Date Posted: 01:26:17 05/04/01 Fri
Author: saira
Subject: result of being ditched



sometimes.
all the time.

my innocent eyes can't see past that face of yours.
or any other face.
and i submit myself to believe in what i want to believe.
not what i know i really should.

in all actuality,
it's reality
that i don't wanna face.

i do my best too. i really do.
i stretch my neck so far,
but you still hinder my view of sight.
and time.

arrogance is something i wish i possess.
and you deny that it rests on the bridge of your nose.
but i guess y'can't see that far anyway.

it's too tight around here,
and each time i place myself under your aim
my waist gets thinner.

disecting the very essence of me.
that's your talent.
i always admired your talents y'know.
i really did.
well, until they made less of me.
until they made every day planned ahead of time for you.
and you didn't even have to say a word to make the mark,
cos it was already stamped

like a cattle.
aimless never went with me.
until that aimless circling of your name.
over
and over
again.
hoping that defining it will make you more fake.
fake enough to please me.

and i pride myself for being so real.
and all i want to do is wear your clothes and play pretend.
it's good, pretend is.
just as long as we remember the door.
i forget tho, and you.
you lock the door on me.

i get scared sometimes so much that my insides scream.
and i swallow it down so hard and fast.

you can't tell.
but then again, you wouldn't.

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