Author:
Anthony
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Date Posted: 12:22:31 05/22/01 Tue
Now pay close attention, young student, for I am about to impart to you the wisdom of the Internet Scholar. He/She is beyond all reproach. This enigmatic being's understanding of everything is unparalleled. "IT" (for how can we really try to put a sex to such intellect) has won every spelling bee in three systems! "IT" simply knows all! Now, the lesson:
"...an empty guestbook is like the sound of one hand clapping. Isn't that very philosophical and Eastern of me? Oh wait, that was sarcasm and very Western. I should move to the East and get some enlightenment, but wait, I am on the East coast. Isn't that East enough, or is it just the East side of the ugly West. Aren't we East of the East. Doesn't that make us the East and them the West? Well I think we named them the East because we all thought we were the center of the world and they were the East of us. Listen to me, with my arrogance, how Western of me.
Put Scooter on the phone. We can't. He's gone East, not really but in his mind, because he thinks that if he "emerges" himself in a culture that he has never visited or encountered physically, but only knows through books, he will be so much more knowledgeable of how life works and should work. Besides, how can we put Scooter on the phone? The phone is soooo Western."
Thus endeth the lesson. Can you not feeeeeel yourself filling with insight? Ah, yes, savor the rush of being closer to the final arbiter of all that is great and terrible on the Internet! Mmmmmmmm, the words of "Jim Bob" are like nectar to the tongue.
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