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Unplanned Pregnancy Discussions


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This board is for women who are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy, and don't know if they want to keep the pregnancy going. You can post your feelings and concerns and fears. Women normally will receive responses from people with both views, prochoice OR prolife. Please understand that by posting here, you will receive a lot of different advice and ideas - these are other people's views and feelings, use them as information as you decide what is the best answer for you and your life. It helps to know all sides of the story when trying to make a difficult decision.

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Help for Unwanted or Unplanned Pregnancies

Subject: devastated


Author:
Mommy of Three
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Date Posted: 10:02:39 08/07/09 Fri

Hello, I didn't find anywhere else to post. I am 9 weeks 3 days pregnant.... something I wanted so badly. I had a great job and everything was going well. That was till 2 weeks ago....

I was the only one working in my family, but it was a great job and it got us by... I lost my job because I was out of FMLA time and my attendance was horrendous when my daughter was in the hospital and then I had a day of morning sickness... I went from makeing $50k a year to $0.00... with no savings.

Now I have a house and car I can't afford. Three kids I can't take care of. I live in a state where people are begging the state for unemployment extensions after their 72 weeks are up.... my husband has no job skills (even though he and I are both looking for jobs). People aren't going to hire me knowing I am pregnant... and its wrong to not let them know...

I wanted this baby so much. I was so excited when I found out. I was so amazingly happy about having a baby again (My older children are 16, 11, and almost 2 yrs)... I had everything. Now this pregnancy isn't fair to this baby. It isn't fair to my other children. And I don't know what I am going to do. I don't want to end it, I love this baby. But what other options are realistically out there? Especially since I have to be a responsible mother?....

I almost would rather just hurt myself... but then I leave 3 kids without a mother. I just don't know what to do anymore..

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Subject: abortions


Author:
Jordyn b (overwhelmed)
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Date Posted: 00:27:06 08/03/09 Mon

my names jordyn and im 18 years old. Im 7 weeks pregnant, the father doesnt want the child and expects me to get an abortion. Ive already had one abortion and to be honest im very pro choice but it honestly has ruined my life, and now im going through the same thing but the father doesnt wwant me to have it even thought i said i wouldnt tell anyone it was his and he didnt have to give me child support or even be involved with the childs life. im so confused everyones telling me different things but i dont know what i want to do=[

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Subject: Confused?????


Author:
Esperanza (Kinda Happy)
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Date Posted: 18:39:01 07/08/09 Wed

Ok I'm 17 gonna be 18.Well here's the thing my periods aren't exactly normal.I had a problem with a cist on my overy I had it removed a year ago...Me and my boyfriend had sex for the very first time and he used a condom.Usually some girls Iv'e talked to say you bleed your first time well my bleeding has lasted a couple days after our first time doing it and I thought maybe it's my period what does that mean?.And on the second time we did it we didn't use a condom some I was bleeding a little bit still and at one point we had put his penis in me and he may have cummed inside me...how do you know if he did cum and can you feel it? Now I been going on 2 and a half months bleeding..could this be my period? or what's going on? I haven't been feeling good these couple days... recently I've been very tired and lazy,my breasts have been hurting,my back and sides have been hurting too..and Haven't been able to eat much,and I've been having pains on my stomache like if somethings in there...I'm not an average girl because of the cist it made me gain a little of weight and now I'm trying to loss some and if I may be pregnant...Will my stomache form more like as if I am pregnant? I'm ok with I am or not pregnant I just love kids and I would be proud to have one but I don't know how my parents would react...and me and my boyfriend have a very good relationship he loves kids just as much as I do so If I am pregnant is it best to tell our parents together? When should I take a pregnacy test? and should I take the test with my boyfriend around?I'm very confused this moment so if you can help me out and answer my question and give me advice it would be very helpful and I really appericate it.*Thank You So Much*

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Subject: A Real Choice


Author:
Westiny
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Date Posted: 00:56:45 06/09/09 Tue

What would really help all of us who have an unwanted pregnancy is for society to quit being a hyprocrit (and we're all guilty of that to come extent) and give women and couples a real choice. Instead of having to choose between the emotionally life-destroying choice of being parents when we don't want to be or aborting an unborn child, why can't the medical community work more extensively toward Fetal Adoption, Live Fetal Extraction & Incubation, and Artificial Womb technology.
How wonderful it would be to go to a doctor or clinic's office and have the unwanted child at the early fetal stage be taken from your womb and placed in the womb of a woman who wants the child! If this comes off as too "far out there", really think about it! No woman would have to go through unwanted childbirth and have the job of unwanted motherhood, women who want children would be more likely to be able to have them and the child (who is totally innocent) would not be aborted. When I was pregnant, it was literally soul-destroying to be told "congratulations" all the time and be told "it will all work out in the end" or "you'll get use to the situation like everybody else". Why is pregnancy, childbirth and childcare, as super difficult as these things can be, just assumed to be something to "congratulate" someone for? (Society has done this for so long and so automatically, that I don't even think we realize what the meaning is behind our words!) If a person is happy with the situation that is one thing, but many are not. And even though I had been married for 10 years when my birth control failed, it was over-whelming to be "congratulated on my pregnancy" just because I was married. Why is it assumed that when birth control tragically fails, that congratulations are in order. - Instead, we need to be able to talk freely and say "No, congratulations are not in order for this situation!" without being labelled in a negative way.

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Subject: i think i mayb preagante but im not sure


Author:
Ashley (wondering)
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Date Posted: 00:53:32 05/04/09 Mon

well me and my boybfriend had sex a week ago right after i got off my period and i know he came in me and i havent been takin my borth control pills like i should ive missed quite a few of them,and i start my period in 2 week o week and half.....could there be a possibility that im preganate

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Subject: Am I pregnant


Author:
Shon (worried)
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Date Posted: 01:17:55 04/22/09 Wed

I was on the birth control patch, I did not now it. It came off I had sex w/ my boyfriend of 8 yrs. My period was due friday of the next week, but it came exactly 1 week early. My period started that fri and ended that tues. We had sex again the next day. Did I start to ovulate once the patch came off and what are the

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Subject: is the depo shot right for me?


Author:
Nellie
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Date Posted: 00:55:09 03/28/09 Sat

Hello, I am 18 years old and i recently got on the depo shot i was normal for the first 3 monthes until my fourth that i started getting this brown viginal discharge. Its been going for about 3 to 4 weeks now. also when i urinate its smells awful. Could this be a light period or some type of infection. this never happened before in the past until i started the shot and started haveing sex. i am very worried please response me asap. thank you.

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Subject: Help Please!


Author:
Sarah
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Date Posted: 17:55:42 02/26/09 Thu

I know this is crazy soon but i just wanted to know my chances....

My boyfriend and i had sex last night. I am not on birth control so we used a condom. after we finished, we realized the condom was broke and almost everthing went in me. I was told your safe days are before your period... and im due to start my period within the next week, but waht are my chances of getting pregnant from last night. are they high or low? Please help me!

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Subject: help me!


Author:
cara
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Date Posted: 00:23:06 02/05/09 Thu

I was on my peiord and on the second to last or last day of it and my boyfriend and i had sex without a condom on Jan 1st it was only for like one mintue if even that but I am a worry wort. so i went and got the pill the on the 3rd. and I had some of the side effects of light bleeding. they said that I should start anywhere from a week early to a week late. well its been four days sence they said I should of started. and my boobs are kinda sore and I'm cranky like I am before I start but I'm still worried. should I be or am I just crazy?

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Subject: Pregnancy after abortion


Author:
Roxanne
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Date Posted: 09:44:24 02/03/09 Tue

I'm a 36 yr old mother of 2 teenagers. 8 weeks ago I had an abortion. My fiance and I had unprotected sex (shame on me!) and now I am pregnant again. I am 2 weeks pregnant. What are the chances that this baby will be healthy? I'm physically fit and I don't believe that is an issue. I'm worried that there could be something wrong with baby since I had an abortion so close to the pregnancy.

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Subject: confused!!!


Author:
Mary
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Date Posted: 03:26:40 01/11/09 Sun

Im 24 with a 3 year old lil boy... for the last 6 months my periods have been regular (every 28 days lasting 5 days starting off really heavy than light)... well i was supposed to start jan 8 but on the 7th i started spotting with a brown discharge and still spotting lightly(today is the 10th)... for the last two weeks my breast have tender and feel fuller, nausea, and slight cramping... can i be pregnant?

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Subject: Why have i got my period again?


Author:
Debbie
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Date Posted: 12:43:41 12/04/08 Thu

my periods are irregular, they come bout every 12 weeks, i had a period 1st september then again on the 18th November so that was about 11 weeks and lasted about 4 days. Then for the past week my boobs have been realy sore and tender and then i started bleeding again today 2 weeks after the end of that period, why do you think that has happened

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Subject: Confused, please help!


Author:
Danielle
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Date Posted: 21:47:47 11/03/08 Mon

My situation is a little different from most, but I still need help. I'm Danielle, I'm 18 years old and I really have no idea what to do. I've been on the Depo-Provera shot for 3 years now, but I've never had this happen before. I had sex on July 12th with my boyfriend and didn't think anything of it, seeing as I'm on birth control and I've had sex before with nothing happening. Well, over the past couple months I've noticed changes, changes that I've never experianced before. I've started gaining weight [which yes, I realize is a side-affect of the shot] but I gained some weight about a year ago do to the shot, which affected my whole body, this weight is mostly around my tummy. And I've had an uncontrolable need for sleep. I'm talking like close to 12 hours a day. Also, I've been having the worst nausea I've ever had, I can no longer lay on my belly [which I used to do often] and so much more. I know that thinking that you might be pregnant can make your body think you are and therefore start to show the symptoms, but this came out of no where. I hadn't even thought about till I started gaining weight and having these other symptoms. Please I just really need some answers. I've read a lot of message boards with women talking about how they've gotten pregnant on the depo shot, and I've read other factors for getting pregnant on the shot and the more I read, the more things add up. I'm really nervous about this, so if anyone can help me I would appreciate it so much.

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Subject: Could i be pregnate?


Author:
Amy (confused)
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Date Posted: 23:07:45 10/31/08 Fri

Okay so my periods are never regular. I havent had one in about 6 months. Not because i am pregnate just because i am irregular. well my boyfriend and i have been having unprotected sex for over a year now. well about a month ago i started my period, kinda. It was very light with like that brown icky discharge. It lasted for a week staying light the whole time. Now my nipples have been sore and i want to have sex all the time which is really not normal for me, and i was just wondering if it is possible that i could be pregnate?

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Subject: worried.....


Author:
Liza (nervous)
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Date Posted: 13:20:48 09/29/08 Mon

I am a 34 year old married woman with 3 amazing children. I have been using "nuvaring" birth control for over a year. I strongly believe I am pregnant ( u know these things after 3 children). I recently found out that "Nuvaring" should be kept in the fridge until use. I had mine ontop of my tv for a few days before I put it in. The pharmacy never told me to refridgerate it. I have 3 children already and don't think I can afford another. I live in a 3 bedroom apartment and can't afford to move. I am so confused as to what I should do. I don't want an abortion, but I can't afford another child! I could never give my baby up either. I just need some advice from others in the same situation. I am being consumed by this morning, noon and night!

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Subject: confused


Author:
paty
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Date Posted: 18:58:35 08/04/08 Mon

i just got on the patch ortho evra and i was wondering that after my 4th week off can i get pregnant

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Subject: A little Confused


Author:
Jenna (Good)
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Date Posted: 00:41:39 06/28/08 Sat

Okay my husband and I had sex last night and he went all the way. Im suppost to start my period like tomorrow could I be pregnaunt?

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Subject: Is it possible that I can be pregnant?


Author:
cm89
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Date Posted: 13:56:14 04/10/08 Thu

OK here's the deal. this is going to sound so stupid, but I need reassurance. My period last month came on march 6th and ended on march 12th, and then a few days after that my boyfriend and I messed around..but I just gave him a handjob/oral and he fingered me and gave me oral. me first, and then i did it to him. we had clothes on but just our pants were down, and never at the same time. but while i was giving him a hand job he was fingering me and i thought that maybe there was some possible way that i'm not sure of he could've got precum on his hands and then fingered me? I don't know if he did for sure or not..i remember him "adjusting" himself and then helping me get his pants down. sorry this is so graphic. but i'm wondering what the chances are?? AND i also got my period on april 4th..with signs leading up to it and major cramping the first day, but my flow was exceptionally lighter than it normally is. now its the 10th and im just spotting. So could stress of me thinking I could be pregnant some how mess up how my flow is?? and am I just being ridiculous? I guess i'm just over thinking things and i've been on websites that say its "unlikely" but possible..so i'm just thinking maybe i just got bad luck?? who knows..but I need another opinion please!!

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Subject: If you are thinking about having an abortion...


Author:
Diane Cheryl
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Date Posted: 08:35:26 02/08/08 Fri

If you are thinking about having an abortion, please go to http://www.voy.com/129741/ and read the sad stories from women just like you who thought they would just have an abortion and everything would be ok. But it's not...
Please let us help you make another plan.

Sincerely,
Diane Cheryl
DCHERYL51@yahoo.com

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Subject: can this be possible????


Author:
danielle (worried)
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Date Posted: 06:15:16 12/26/07 Wed

HI my name is danielle iam 20 years olds and heres my story.... me and my b/f have been having unprotected sex now for a month, but he does use the "pul out" method! i normally start my period on the 29th and go on into the next month and bleed very heavy for the first few days, well this time i started dec.23 and was bleeding very very lightly and no cramps what so ever! and then two days later i am only bleeding like one to two drops NO MORE THAN THAT??? could i be pregnant??? or am i just over reacting???

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Subject: need answers fast!


Author:
Krista
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Date Posted: 22:32:51 12/12/07 Wed

i just found out a few days ago that i am about 4-5 weeks preg. i dont know what to do.. im not with the guy.. and it was totally unplaned.. im thinking about taking the pill form of abortion. i have an apt. on monday.. but i dont know if thats what i really wanna do. my main fear is that for the past month.. i have been getting wasted.. like bad every weekend.. and smoking weed once in a while. i dont want the baby to have defects if i decided to have it.. what are the chances of it being messed up from me doing so much partying the first month of development? HEEEELLLP!

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Subject: Feeling a little stressed


Author:
Candace
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Date Posted: 22:35:38 10/31/07 Wed

I am having an abortion in 2 weeks or so. I have weighed out all the pros and cons. I jus wish there was more positive support. I know I am doing the right thing, I am scared about the procedure.

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Subject: I Don't Know if Im Pregnant


Author:
Stacy
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Date Posted: 23:14:23 11/29/05 Tue

Im 16 I had sex on August 26 and started my period the same day. I've had my period every month but its been light. I've been nashus, very tired, light headed and my brest have been sore, also my stomic is hard and getting bigger. I can feel a heart beat in my lower stomic. I've taken 3 epts and they were all negitive. Could i still be pregnant?
Please respond someone i dont know what to do

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