Re: Sexual abuse as a young boy and TGT -- Straight Spouse Network Open Forum

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Date Posted: 06:15:29 05/23/16 Mon
Author: Casseopia
Subject: Re: Sexual abuse as a young boy and TGT
In reply to: Betsy 's message, "Re: Sexual abuse as a young boy and TGT" on 01:48:53 05/22/16 Sun

Thank you. I have good, strong boundaries now. I am selling my house and moving (the sale should be complete within about six weeks), I have told him I cannot have him back when he leaves rehab and I have got a wonderful group of friends who are feeling very protective of me right now... So I'm doing all I can to protect myself.

Why do you feel it's remarkable that my husband went to rehab? I felt (and so did he) that it was absolutely essential. He had started to hit rock bottom with his secret double life. Despite his excellent appearances, inside he was falling apart.

He's a strong character - very ambitious, very good at anything he turns his hand to and I guess the rehab will be no different for him in that respect. He will be doing well at it, as he does at everything and I have no doubt he will have surrendered to the therapy. He does want to be happy and live an honest life - with or without me - so as brutal as he is finding rehab, he will complete it, go to his after-care and follow-up sessions and try to live more honestly.

I do not know if I can be around to witness this myself as a huge amount of damage has been done. And this makes me SO mad! My husband is beautiful, I mean honestly, head-turningly gorgeous, he's really funny, kind, ambitious - and then I imagine the man he will be if he gets a grip on his issues - gorgeous, funny, kind, ambitious, honest and then also: self-aware, happy and true to himself. And I think - I've been through SO much with this man... if he can resolve his issues and be who he wants to be and who he really is, somebody else will have the most wonderful, amazing man on their hands. And why should that not be me?!! That would be the shittiest cherry on top of a very shitty cake to have been through all of this and then knowing someone else will get all the goodness and honesty of him when that is all I have ever wanted for him.

Sorry about the rant. Arghhhh - this is SO hard!

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