Well, I talked to DH.....more -- January 98 Playgroup

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Date Posted: 21:38:29 04/14/03 Mon
Author: marshun(Martha)
Subject:

Well, I talked to DH.....more

I don't know if I made any progress or not. DH told me that he enjoys the smoke. I asked if he enjoys the mood swings, the depression, the sleeping through the kids lives, the risk of us both going to jail and losing our children. He tols me no. He said that he was just as depressed on the prozac as he is on the smoke. I told him that is because both the smoke and the prozac are treating a symptom and not the cause and that he needs to get to the core of the depression and deal with that.

I asked him where we go from here and he said his choices are to stop the smoke and stay married or to keep on smoking and not stayed married. I told him that was right and I could not stand buy and watch him kill himself.

Again, I don't know if this got anywhere. My gut is telling me he was kicking himself for leaving it where I could find it, yet he does not see the harm in using it. "It makes him feel good". I do not want to give up on this marriage and I did tell him that he needs to get help, that I can not help him, only he can. I just don't know about anything anymore.

He asked if I was happy and I told him no, but it didn't have a damn thing to do with him. He told me he felt it did and I told him it does not, that it has to do with YEARS of being told how ugly, stupid and unimportant I was the entire time I was sharing a room with my sister. That I am working on changing ME and I felt he needed to work on HIM, but with help.

THats about it for now......

Cyber Hugs,
Martha

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Replies:

Im confused... -- Ginger, 23:14:10 04/14/03 Mon
- Ginger.....more -- marshun(Martha), 06:45:28 04/15/03 Tue
  - Martha, I have thought about this some more, and... -- Heidi, 08:07:29 04/15/03 Tue
  - Martha, I have to agree with Heidi and Ginger....(m) -- fiwee, 09:16:01 04/15/03 Tue
  - Martha, I've been quiet on this whole issue but something in your post this time makes me have to speak up....(m) -- Pauline, 16:24:40 04/15/03 Tue
    - Pauline...I am so happy... -- Heidi, 21:57:54 04/15/03 Tue
    - Wow, that was powerful, Pauline. Martha, listen to her, she knows what she's talking about...(m) -- Chris's Mom, 23:40:45 04/15/03 Tue
Martha, I'll phone tonight... also, 'smoke' is a depressant (m) -- Beverlee, 07:55:43 04/15/03 Tue
Martha, since I agree with all that's been posted above. I'll just repeat...be strong, have faith, we're here for you! (NT) -- donnabelle70, 09:29:51 04/15/03 Tue
Thank You all for your support....more -- marshun(Martha), 18:53:20 04/15/03 Tue

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