- hello -- j-skee, 21:14:50 06/10/01 Sun
Well Anna it is nice to have family around. It is nice to go and hang out with them over at my moms house. But you would think that would help me, but I am still annoyed. Because now I wonder what they are doing now that they have even more time to be together alone. Not that she would care weather or not I cared. I just think that I need to get up the nerve and ask her what the heck is going on. It just bothers me that all of her actions seem to be still saying the same darn thing. That she is trying to persue him. I know this is the nastiest thing a person could say but I hope that for some reason he hurts her, not physically of course. But I hope that at some point he get tired of her and doesnt let her down easy, that he is mean and nasty to her. Oh my gosh I just actually wrote all that stuff down. Now I am really getting bad and annoyed with this whole situation. Ya know the question I keep asking myself is "Why does this whole thing bother me so darn much?" Maybe someone else could give me some insight as to what they think is making me so annoyed. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! Sorry I needed to do that. Don't want to bust anyones ear drums so that is the best scream I am allowed to do since screaming right now would not be a wise decision. Or would it be at any time considering I live in an apartment.
Okay here I go again rambling on and on about my pathetic life that really is not as bad as I think it is, just my love life is as bad as I think it is. Do you know that the feeling that I might not ever meet someone to spend my life with eats away at me every day. I have to say that I think about weather or not I am going to find somoene at least once a day. Now tell me that isnt sad. I really, truely, actually feel that I am doomed to spend the rest of my life alone. I always question why me? I don't in any way blaim God like I would have in the past. I know that he has a plan for all of us but it scares me to think what if his plan for me is to spend the rest of my life alone without anyone but friends to share it with me. I hate not knowing and I hate not having a stable mental life. Anna I am sure there are days where you wish you could just drown all your worries, pains and sorrows in a bucket of water and dump that bucket in a river and watch it float away. Well that is the way that I am feeling right now. Life is such a deep and complex unaxplainable mess. How do we sometimes survive each day knowing that we have to face the next day, the next week and even the years to come and we don't even know what to expect? Its way beyond the sheer understanding of even the smartest people in the world. What motivates and drives some of us to live every single day where there are those that just purely give up on life all together. Why is the mind so complex it drives us to emotions so far beyond our touch and understanding? Emotions that can drive us over the edge into an abyss of darkness. Okay I think I need to stop where I am before I start to not only confuse myself but confuse everyone else here, if I have not already done so.
I guess now that it is 11pm I should go to bed. I have to get up and go to work in the morning. I have no idea where Catherine is right now, annoyed, annoyed, she is probably doing somehting with Josh. Oh well I will try and stop by tomorrow after I hang out at moms. I love and miss each and every one of you guys. Lots of love and hugs.
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- me -- A, 14:28:38 06/10/01 Sun
Hey guys!
Jaskee I am so glad your family are all getting there safely! It is good for you to have them there so ya have something else to focus on other then them two peeps. Aren't guys fun? haha, them are confusing. I can't belive your boss didn't close up shop! Did you actaully have any customers(when you were there)? If the power was off I would run to the store, well clothing store, I know food stores have genorters but I would think of even trying to shop, wierd.
Ohh my tape to a cd, nice. I was just thinking last night that for a gift,I wouls say xmas, then I have LOTS of time, lol, but whenever I finish them works too. I was gonna have you all give me lik 16 songs artist and song and Iw ill make a cd, I will find al the mp3's and such, so if it works, it gives me something to do.
mom is now sick too, and dad feeels yucky. Other then my shake i threw up all the food I manged to get down yesterday, ugh. Also threw my night pills up, so I didn't sleep at all last night, I have a med that makes me sleep but thought I would be ok if I missed...nope! Plus I was having withdrwls for it, not a nice night. Might be on later, S-Skee, you home yet?? past friday! Although you are prob sleeping, lol.
laters, sorry I post but not log on to IM =(
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- Family -- j-skee, 22:33:01 06/09/01 Sat
Armen and Chris are now here in C-ville!!!!!! Its nice to have family in town. I am so excited. My aunt, unle and cousine should be here tomorrow. Than Lara and Nick are coming with my grandma and cousin Destiny ont Tuesday night.
The powere went out at work today at around 12:15pm. When I left at 5pm the power was still off and they werent planning on closing the store until 7pm if it didnt cut back on. We did have a few lights and registars working from the generator. I think that our store manager is an idiot for keeping the store open.
Josh I guess was at the mall today and stopped by work and said hello to me. I thought that was very nice of him. That boy is so confusing its not even funny. Did I tell you what he said to me last saturday night. Catherine and Josh had gotten drunk at a party over at another apartment. My friend Matt came over to hang out with me. Than we left around 1am I guess. Catherine went to bed and Josh was still over here and the two of us just chilled out and talked. When I started to feel not so good I got up to get a drink of water and my pills and was sitting on the arm of the couch (I had been lying on the floor while he hogged the couch), he said something interesting to me. He said to me that when I am the way I was that I am so much more attractive. I was like what are you talking about. He said when you act like you have been acting this evening you are more attractive. I guess he ment more mellowed out but I'm not sure. Now you tell me what I am supposed to make of that? How do I interpret that message? I think of course it was supposed to be taken as a compliment but is there some hidden "something" behind it. Oh well life is life so you must live it.
Oh Anners did I tell you that I am going to try and get a cd writter drive, and if and when I do I am probably going to need the list of the songs I put on your tape so that I can make you a CD instead. So that you can actually listen to it more often.
Okay ladies I am headed off to bed. I love you guys a whole bunch.
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- another me update..guess you might be reading this otherwise I am updating myself to myself, lol j/k -- A, 19:19:04 06/08/01 Fri
I just got back from the doc's a little bit ago. Thankfully they let us stick to our plan! Yay! Which mean no hospital for me!! Weehhh! We are going to wait a week and see if it goes away if not, well, tell ya that in a sec Obvously it could be many things but we think it is one of three 1-Just my lupus it will run it's course like it alays does when I get things 2-some odd flu going around that have some symtops that kinda sorta not really match mond(this is a ding dong's idtio nurse saying that) or the pressure of my esophagus(sp) is not right. If I am not better in a week or two I will have to see a GI doc and do a whole bunch of tests i DO NOT want to do again. This is all if I can keep myself hydroated, I already am a little dehydroated so they are giving me IV fluid as soon as my nurse, Terry, gets here. I will see my normal doc later this week to say if I have enough fluds or need more (seeing him instead of driving to stanford for that) I still have that thraot kinda numbing thing and they said when my pain doc is back on tuesday we should ask him to give me a bigger vbolice (he doesn't know we are doing a little of this already, but what he doesn't know can't hurt him *grin* I know it is safe and not gonna kill me cause Terry says I can, lol) soo otherwsie, I hurt..LOTS this is awful! I am hungry but the pain ani't worth it. I do have to drink at least one carantion breakfast things a day and that is murder. Then to add to my depression of this thing, when I got home I found a plate from Rhonda that had my FAVORITE cookies (that I have been craving for a long time) and I can't eat them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Daddy stuck them in the freezer and said "You mom WILL NOT eat them, you will get them" hehe nice daddy. Ok, update ya again when something happens. I got a few pis so If I have engery i may post a few when I get on. Love ya guys lots!
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- me update -- A, 20:47:17 06/07/01 Thu
Howdy folks!
I thought I would drop by and say hi. This is the first time I have been up off my bed since I wrote my last post. I am shaking and dizzy, called lack of food for 4 days, mom is trying to make me eat which I would LOVE but it ain't worth the pain. I may end up at the dreaded hospital. but don't thnk I will b/c of lots of reasons, 1-I am to old for the hospital so I would have to be bounced around in rooms since I, the oldest, is the first to get "bumped" 2-the home nurse can do all the things they can do there 3-I am feeling a itty pitty tiny weenie tiny tiny bit better 4-we know it is my sickness, we had this cycle of this before (just ten times worse this time) no need o do all these tests but we just have to make the docs relaize that, cause they nt the ones who did thoses tests.
I magned to get down half of a carnation instant breakfast (they say it is the same as ensure but better tasting) but it hurt for quiet some time after. Taking my pills is murder I put that off as long as I can, thank god I am not having to take 73 pills a day like I used to.
Terry(my best nurse) is coming tonight to access me and see how dehyroated I am and all that stuff, and to chance my needle WAHHH it gonna hurt!! But if I in the hospital then the staff there has to changeit when it is time and I DO NOT want that, Terry knows me and the port ands still has trouble. We are going to ask for the nu,bing med on the first try and not do the "We try once and if that doesnt work then we use it.
pain doc is out of twon so we can't upi it. I have med that I drink that kinda numbs the thraot but not much help, but I do take it cause it does something.
Ok, I drinking another shake thingy so I gotta go, ack it gonna hurt waahhh I am turning into a baby. I am so dehydroated that I have massive headache, fever, etc etc such fun my life is. It is all Silvers fault! The traumaticnes of her leaving for a week just got up with me *nisff sniff* hehe j/k love you guys and Kimmy I hope your week is going better (and the rest of you had a nice week too =), lol)
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- Me, complaing, again and again and again -- A, 19:08:19 06/06/01 Wed
Hey guys, I prob not gonna be on the next few days. My thraot is really really really really BAD and it hurts like heck! I can't drink or eat, nothing is helping. i am getting some IV benedrly they think I may be having a reaction from a drug I have been taking for a very long time and never had a prob. If that doesn't hep I go to the doc on friday and i may have to have fluid put in me (not getting like I thought I was) they gave me this med to numb my thraot all the way to my tummy in hopes that I can get food..it isn't working!!! am going nuts I am so hunry but it ain't worth the pain. Miss yuou guys lots!!!!
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- Me, complaing, again, what new? -- A, 22:21:15 06/05/01 Tue
ugh! I think I mentioned my trouble with my throat, and if not I can't eat or drink w/o massive amounts of pain and spasms in my throat/chest. If you combind everything I have eaten in the past three days it wouldn't even come close to a real meal size. The pain keeps getting worse and worse. I finally managed to get a whole yogurt(sp, drawing a blank) I decided to do it kinda fast instead of, one bite stop until pain gone, bite, wait, I thought this s dumb, eat it all fast and even thugh I know it will hurt worse at the end but gotta be better then all the pain the other way (make sense? No,m didnt think so) but I got it down! That was until 2 mins later when I threw it all right back up, all that pain and effort toget soemthing in my and I throw it up! Very frusterating!!! Only reason I am not dehyroated is cause I have fluid getting to my by my med bag and I can tell i am dehydrated a little. I am so weak and so tired and SOOO HUNGRY but it isn't worth the pain to eat, they are gonna have to do something soon if this no stop. So that is why I am not here much, sorry! Hope you all had a good day and have a good one tomarrow!!!!
Love A-Skee
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- Rosie! -- A, 17:40:08 06/04/01 Mon
Hey guys don't miss nsync on Rosie tomarrow! They are preforming pop!!!
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- A-Skee he dead -- A, 21:49:53 06/03/01 Sun
Hello!
I am so incredible tired and blah! We went to a wedding today. It was up in the Serria(sp) area so the drive took like 2 hours, each way. Lucky there was a wind cause it was 80 and most of the serice was outside. We knoew this so we dragged along a umbrella cause the groom.our fried said there was no shade but it turned out there was nice little spot in the shade! yay! Then for the reception we waited until the end of the recieving line so we are also the last ones in the hall (more people then tables/chairs) so parents were saying we should judt go but I said no! Mom said we could have cake and stick around since we drove this far so then one of the fam members said you can have our table(cause fam has reserved seats) so we sat with the fam thanks to the very nice man.
Until friday s-skee?!?!?!?!?! NOoooOOOooooOOOO not that I see you much even when you are home but still!
J-Skee I sirry your tummy is having problems! I hope you are much better now! No being sick! Eps when fam is coming soon, that would be ucky to be sick while they are here. You may need to see a doc again about this prob. And why on earth is Josh biting you?!?!?! Bite him back man! That is wrong. I hii-ya him, bad boy!
Ok, going now..
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- Leaving on a jet plane... -- Silver, 19:35:21 06/03/01 Sun
Well, sorta.
Just letting you know I'm leaving town tonight and will be back Friday. Take care, love ya lots!
Silver
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- not feeling well at all -- j-skee, 01:02:40 06/03/01 Sun
Okay for once I can complain about something different. It is 3am in the morning and j-skees stomach is really really bothering her. I feel like I am going to be sick. This is never a good sign. I just hope that I can ride it out and make it through the night without a trip to the emergency room.
I thought you all would be interested to know that I have some bite marks on my arm, thanks to Josh. I guess he thought it would be cute to bite me. I have a feeling I am going to get a bruise.
Okay I need to go I think I am going to be sicck. I love you guys so very much.
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- just a little j-skee update -- j-skee, 21:06:51 05/28/01 Mon
Let me tell you what we did today. Catherine, Josh and I went on a hike up to Humpback Rock. Where you get to look out over the Shenandoah Valley, and there is an amazing view of the mountains. It was so awesome. It kinda makes you feel more like you are in touch with God. I prayed a lot while I was up there and I really don't think I got any answers, or any that I wanted. I know that it is all part of God's greater plan for me. But it still doesnt make my life feel any better. But I really am trying to not let it annoy me and the simple fact is that it is annoying me. I even asked my mother why it seems to still bother me so much. Ya know I asked my mother this question and she couldn't come up with an answer but maybe someone else can. How come it is that those who play by the rules there whole lives seems to come in last place, while those who don't play by the rules seem to come out smelling like roses? That is my question for the night. I hope to talk to you guys tomorrow. I don't work on Wed so I might be up late. I love you guys a lot.
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- Shrek -- j-skee, 21:34:52 06/01/01 Fri
Okay ladies I just got back from seeing Shrek. The movie was hilarious. I was laughing a whole lot. Of course I really dont think it is a movie for kids. Way to many jokes and things the young ones would never get or never understand. But I liked it and so did the rest of us. The movie comes highly recommended.
I don't think I have anything else to post for this evening. I think I am having a decent day. Now isnt that impressive.
Oh my gosh I gotta go finish my laundry. I just remembered I have a load of clothes in the dryer and washer. I guess that means I should go. I love you ladies lots and lots and lots.
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- My turn! -- A, 17:30:34 06/01/01 Fri
My turn to vent! Not like we are taking turins or anything, I vent pretty much every time I post =)
I got my pain meds uped, right? Right, they had to send out a new pump that was programed for that (they can't tell you how cause then you know how to chanage how much you are getting and give yourself more) well me thinking they didn' set it right b/c I am in AWFUL pain! i was hurting less when I was on the lower does. Didn't sleep last night, still have this cold, throwing up, can't eat. So mom and I decided not to do WT today that I would sleep in and we would get my blood drawn and run to the store to do some shopping I really need to get done. Guess mom mentioned this to dad who had a fit saying if I could go to the store I could go to WT. he doen't understand how much enery WT is from sitting in a chair and being pushed around the store. Then terry was saying I had to go, had to push myself blah blah which i do all the time, I always do too much. So after much crying (ypu, I a baby), pretty much crying in frustation. So I decide to go and just stay in a few mins *grin* dad didnt say how long I had to go. I was really sick before, as I said, I got in the water and got even sicker! I had to "run" to my clothes, which takes forever and enegy to do LOTS of enegy. i got this lovely massive headache, if I moved, turned, talked it got so bad, then I startec throwing up. I knew this would happen but I wanted to show dad and tery that I should not have gone today (Have to be in pain lotx but they know now) Terry is always the one saying "Don't do it if you an't" "You need to go slow" Neither of then wanted to know my reasons why I didn't want to go it wasn't cause I was just sleepy UGUUGGHHH So now I am absolity miserable *sigh* Dad thanked me for making the effot, kinda said sorry, kinda, he was so cute when he said it that I lost half my madness for him. Oh yes, the cruddy part, I only went so I could shop today, well I got so sick that I didn't even get to go!!!
Terry coming tonight to change my needle. I hope it goes in with no pan this time, I am so hurting like crazy and I don;t need any added pain, thanks though.
I will be on again later.
Jskee is your fam coming in for your bro graduation? Sounds like fun and gives you something to look forward to.
Love you all and hope to see someone tonight!
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- me -- j-skee, 20:37:34 05/31/01 Thu
Hello ladies. Its nice to know that long posts are not a bad thing and that they can even be encouraged. You guys are such great friends and always give good advice. Even if I don't take all of it. At least I know there are other opinions out there. My mom has also been a great help as well. She always has a good out look on things and has great advice as well, and believe me it has been needed. I know that she is just a few miles up the road and that means I can go and see her very easily.
So can you guys guess where Catherine is right now? Next door, thats right. Where am I? Sitting right here on the puter talking to you guys, well sorta. Josh came over for all of about two seconds and said do you want to go to the movies tomorrow with a group of people. I said maybe. Gee I wonder if by an "odd" chance Jay would be one of those people. I can make about a 100% sure guess he is one of those. That to me sounds like another attempt to hook me up. Guess what guys it aint going to happen. They are almost to pathetic for me. Ya know what I was thinking; that the reason he must like her is because she acts like a child a lot of the time, so therefore she is right on his level with him. As nasty as this sounds I hope that what ever is going on between them blows up in both of their faces. Oh my gosh that is so not something I should say. I should wish them the best and be a good girl. (God give me strength.)
Ya know I gotta come up with something to do tomorrow. I have a day off and have no plans other than to do my laundry and run by work and get my pay check and do a few things I have to do. But that wont take all day. Maybe I will take a nice long bubble bath with a bunch of candles burning and no natural light. That very well could be a plan for tomorrow.
Well I guess that is it for me right now. I am going to be on for a bit hoping to maybe see one of you guys. I kinda got the time tonight. Don't have to worry about getting sleep since I can sleeep in. I love you guys lots and lots. OH one more thing I am really rooting for some payed time so that I can get out there to see you guys. Although I think having all my family in town in a week and a half will help because I will probably spend most of my time over there with them. Okay enough for now.
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- Pics -- A, 18:28:08 05/29/01 Tue
**see subject**
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Long posts are LOVED and ENCOURAGED here -- Silver, 14:28:47 05/31/01 Thu
Woohoo, J-Skee is fightin' back! You ANNOY the heck out of them, girl. Cuz they hot diggity well annoy YOU. Do you have carpets? You can try vaccuuming whenever they're around. "Ooh, drats, there's all these DIRT and SLIME around this place again -- those two just go hand in hand, don't they? Guess I'll have to vaccuum yet again." Vroooom. Mwahahaha! >:)
I think the heat is getting to me. It was a record breaking 101 degrees yesterday in San Francisco. Hottest ever recorded for the month of May in SF history. Yeesh. The sun's not letting up today either. Go away!!
My bedroom window faces away from the ocean, which isn't good because that means I don't get any fresh, cool air blowing in my way. You see, there's a thing called sea-breeze and land-breeze. During the day, the land heats up faster than the ocean, and therefore the wind, which blows from hot to cool air, is blowing from the land towards the ocean, which is a land-breeze and that...well, that doesn't explain why I'm not getting fresh air, does it? Scratch that thought. But my meteorology teacher would have been proud I remembered all this stuff. :-)
J-Skee, regarding this set-up thing they have with you and Shy Boy, have you told them you're not interested, no offense to Shy Boy? I wasn't aware Catherine was capable of guilt! Will surprises never cease?!
Okay, that was mean, but did it make you laugh at least? ;-)
Really though, I applaud you for at least trying to have a functional relationship with a real guy. Look at me -- I don't hang out with boys, I hardly talk to any that aren't related, and I'm all around awkward around them for I haven't a clue what to say. Instead, I have ridiculous crushes on celebrities, some of them twice my age, and I spend my days conversing with fans on mailing lists and message boards about them, as well as watch and record any movies/TV appearances that they're in. Now tell me, is that not unhealthy? Do I not need mental help more than you? Of course. Sign me up immediately, I say.
Like the Wicked Witch in Oz, I'm melting in this heat, so I shall go sit on the stairs outdoors and enjoy a book now. Might be on later if we're not in the midst of a rolling black out.
A-Skee, I bet it's even hotter for you over there, poor thing! Stay cool and comfortable!
*hugs*
Silver
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- uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh -- j-skee, 19:41:47 05/30/01 Wed
Hello there my friends in internet land. I thought I would stop by and say a nice little hello, howdy, bonjour, whasup, etc. Okay in case you didnt notice I am in a sorta strange mood this evening. I think I can qualify this as a "good" day. As good as can be expected. I cleaned up the house today and I think it is well on its way to being a mess again. But what can you do. I will just try and clean up a little more again on friday when I have another day off. I have started to get rude with Catherine and Josh when they start acting up in the evening. The last two nights in a row I have told them to shut up and quit when they were picking at eachother. Silver Im taking your advice to try and annoy them. Okay weird I just got a knock on my door and when I got up to answer it i saw someone running away. Okay whatever. Next time someone does that I'm not getting up to answer it. Think that is a good idea? Yep I agree it is a good idea. Okay now I am imagining you guys responding to the question. I think I have lost it, officially. Okay back to the subject at hand. I think that they are still trying to hock me up with one of the guys that Josh works with, who (oh how do I put this nicely) just isnt my type. Okay why not just say it, I'm shallow, he isnt that good looking. He also a little bit to shy for me. I like a guy who is a little more outgoing. Someone who talks and has conversations. Someone with a sense of humor is a good thing too. Ya wanna know my theory on why Josh and Catherine are pushing this "thing". You do okay here it is; she wants me to like Jay so that she can actively persue Josh (not that she isnt already giving every indication that she is) without feeling guilty about it. Of course he wants me to like someone else, other than him, so that Catherine can go for him and not feel "guilty" about damaging our friendship. So in a nut shell, its get Kim out of the picture. You think that is a good theory? That is if you even understood what I was trying to get at. Let me know if you dont get it and I will try and explain better, I think, hehehehehehe!!!!!
Okay so I know that silver doesnt get mtv (i sorry sweetie) but Anna did you see the Making of the Video? So what do you think? What is your opinion of the video and the song? I like the song and I thought the video was one of the most interesting videos that I have ever seen. I thought it was creative and entertaining. Wayne Isham has done it again. That man is something else. I think he really does try to out do himself every time he does a new video. I really think the guys are trying to take there music to somewhere it has not yet been. Oh wow isnt that what there goal is, to take their music to the next level. Wow I guess if I noticed it than they are doing what they wanted.
Okay ya wanna know why I think she isnt valuing our friendship, she is over at Josh's house right now. She does this quit often. Goes over there for an extended period of time. Not asking if I would like to come over. Its kind of annoying if you know what I mean. There was also what I think was hand holding the other night when we were over there watching a movie, I could be mistaken but thats what it looked like to me.
Gosh I keep hearing all kinds of noises tonight. Maybe I should turn the volume on the tv back on. I have it muted right now because well it was kind of annoying. But I'm starting to get weirded out by the noises.
Okay enough of my story for the day. I'm sorry to ramble on and on lately. I just dont know what else to do but talk to you guys about my issues. I know that at some point you are going to get annoyed with the fact that I havent kept a post short at all lately, accept maybe one. I love you guys so much and cant thank you enough for all the support that you have given me lately.
Okay my computer just kicked me off the internet just as i was about to post this message. Thank goodness it didnt like shut down and make me loose the message I was typing.
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- ugh -- A, 17:32:41 05/30/01 Wed
Hello long lost friends.
I had WT today and it killed me. I felt awful this morning and debated about not going but Ifigured that this is one f those things that it doesnt matter hw you feel you still have to do it (I "thank" the docs for telling me that before) However mom and I think that next time I shouldn't go. I was/am so sick afterwards. I came home and slept for a few hours. I tried to come online earlier but couldn't stay awake or really understand what I was doing/reading, lol.
Janie finally made it back to work today. She says her neck and such is doing the same thing, but there is no way! That stuff is way out of her symptoms/ She feels she can justify not going to work if she can blame it on this.oh well
Love ya guys lots!
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- Concert Pictures -- A, 23:36:07 05/23/01 Wed
For the fun of it I am going to post all Pop tour photos in this thread and the other pics in the other picture thread
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- Two more>> -- A, 23:37:42 05/23/01 Wed
- I know Jskee said she doesn't go much to LB so I am going to post all the pic I find even if they have been posted over there, if this si ok don't reply, if not ok then tell me (forgive me if I post them twice, I do my best to remeber which ones I put up) -- A, 19:03:30 05/24/01 Thu
- Mechanic bulls during Space cowboys (with girl dances BLAH I thin only for this song, I hope. One thing i really didn't like was bsb having dancers and be worse for nsync to spla)some from IGBM too, maybe -- A, 19:18:10 05/24/01 Thu
- From a news confrence thingy before the show -- A, 19:19:52 05/24/01 Thu
- From MTV.com -- A, 19:21:46 05/24/01 Thu
- More...whew, yeesh lots of pics from that concert, lol -- A, 20:16:34 05/24/01 Thu
- Concert Pictures (some soundcheck -- A, 17:35:52 05/25/01 Fri
- Re: Concert Pictures -- A, 17:51:07 05/25/01 Fri
- These pics are really good but really big. Since some have slow poke puters I will only do a few =) YeeHa cowby, giddy up! -- A, 17:55:42 05/25/01 Fri
- Concert Pictures ewww dooee girls! Blah--band -- A, 18:01:42 05/25/01 Fri
- Re: Concert Pictures -- A, 18:08:32 05/25/01 Fri
- Check this out! it is intersting. it's map with al the tour stos marked and such, pretty cool -- A, 17:19:22 05/26/01 Sat
- Not concert but cool pics>> too lazy to move it to the other pics post hehe -- A, 17:24:22 05/26/01 Sat
- Good concert and some,supposedly, from the celeb photo shoot -- A, 17:56:51 05/28/01 Mon
- yes, more Concert Pictures trying to only do the best best ones **trying tokeep concert and non-concert apart but sometimes I lazy andmix them up, lol**.. -- A, 18:30:42 05/28/01 Mon
- Lance Concert Pictures -- A, 19:23:42 05/28/01 Mon
- Pictures out of the tour book. Since there are lots of pics and the are big I prob won't post them all, cause there are LOTS! lol -- A, 19:34:11 05/28/01 Mon
- Tour Book Part2 -- A, 19:50:35 05/28/01 Mon
- Re: Concert Pictures -- A, 18:37:15 05/29/01 Tue
- howdy folks -- A-Skee, 17:31:41 05/29/01 Tue
Hey guys!
Sorry I han't been on hardly at all, enough to post some pics I get in emails and such and to sy hi. I really did think I would be on more once I moved here but guess not, lol.
The trip is finally catching up to me. Well, either that or I am getting flu/cold again! I hope for the first one. At any rate I feel very cruddy. Some good news though! I think I mentioed before that my pain doc wasn't letting me up my med until we saw him and junk. well, my chest has been hurting kinda bad again so we called and I can go up to 5 now!!! I won't go right to 5 I'm on 4 now so I prob go up to 4.3, sounds small but this stuff is powerful.
It is SOOOO hot! I went to the store with my mom and got hot and then came home where the a/c has been on all day and i got really sick from the temp changing to fast. I have a cough and fever too, blahs.
Tomarrow is WT again! We also have my baby tomarrow. he is starting to "talk" and it is so precious listening to his cooing. I was singing to him and with one finger was rubbing lightly from one cheek, below his mouth and up the other cheek and he would smile and luagh outloud and coo so so so so cute!
Glad you had fun on the hike. I understand wanting answers from God or anyone, lol, I could use a few. Just think of Job and all that crap he had to go through and didn't know or understand why. i agree(and know)that God has a plan for you/us even though that statment doesn't help much, lol.
Well, I should be back on later tonight if I can feel better
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- Pics -- A, 20:00:55 05/21/01 Mon
see subject
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- few newer pics (group pic w/ lance's hair black -- A, 20:07:33 05/21/01 Mon
- btw, rif=if above..cute pics -- A, 17:42:25 05/22/01 Tue
- more pics -- A, 18:08:14 05/22/01 Tue
- Pics (Pop set-Joey with lance's mama- "old" nsync haha etc) -- A, 21:12:05 05/23/01 Wed
- Caps from the Anti-drug thing (close shots) -- A, 21:23:48 05/23/01 Wed
- Imax-concert-justin on the news -- a, 18:57:23 05/24/01 Thu
- New pic from the Jive site. They posted on LB but as I said/know not all ya guys go there so here they be>>(kinda big, s-skee you have seen them and since you slow you may want to skip, lol -- A, 16:56:54 05/26/01 Sat
- bunch of cute pics-movie poster from Lance's movie -- A, 17:08:12 05/26/01 Sat
- Some LOL pics -- A, 18:17:49 05/28/01 Mon
- I'm freeee...freeee-fallin' -- Silver, 19:00:54 05/27/01 Sun
WOOHOO, I'm OUTTA SCHOOL!
And lovin' every minute of it...until summer school starts.
Yes, ladies, this little one is going to summer school this year, as much as she abhor it, she has no choice. But let's speak of better things...
I downloaded this program that downloads stuff for you when you're not using the computer. You just add the links to it and it automatically does everythingn for you. Ain't that neat? Last night I left the puter on so it would download a whole bunch of mp3's I wanted. Did I tell you that was my latest hobby? Downloading a bunch of 80's music mp3s. Half the fun is searching for them...it's like finding a gold mine when you come across a page with a ton of mp3 just free for your picking!
So far, I got the Roxette, Martika, Air Supply, some old Mariah Carey stuff, Eric Clapton, Bonnie Tyler...a bunch of goodies.
I also downloaded most of Westlife's songs...I think I'll get their album after all. There's one song on it that I LOVE to death! It's a cover of an old song called "Seasons in the Sun." It's such a sweet, sad song about a guy going to war or dying or something. Have any of you heard it? I first heard the song a long time ago from someone I loved very much so hearing the song again was very touching. The mp3 I got was cut off at the end though so I must search for another one. But definitely gonna get the album.
I finally caught up with all the emails I got from Colin Firth's mailing list. But I still have a whole bunch of emails to write back to people. And a bunch of movies and tv shows to watch from when I recorded during finals and whatnot. Did you guys watch Dark Angel? Geeze, what a way to end the season! And I *liked* that guy. Won't spoil it for those who haven't seen it yet.
Going out with my buds to watching Shrek and Bridget Jones's Diary (again). Gotta get my Darcy fix before it's out of the theater. ;-)
Um, what else is up with me. Nothing, I guess. Glad your environment has improved with the removal of the two peeps causing you so much trouble lately. You keep your chin up, buddy. The storm will pass soon. ;-)
C-Skee, what is up with you? You need to post more, girly! I know, I know, who am I to speak...
A-Skee, you've got to find some way to get yourself to the concert! I mean it! ;-)
Love ya lots, have a great weekend, stay safe,
Silver
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- hello -- j-skee, 21:58:24 05/26/01 Sat
Hello ladies. I am I think having a decent night. Catherine is in Richmond for the night so I dont have to deal with her. Josh went to DC to visit his brother for the long weekend. The only thing I am bummed about is the fact that I have to work tomorrow and of course I had to work today. But I do have off monday, wed, and friday next week. That is about all that I have for right now. Love you guys.
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- on and off -- A-Skee, 16:43:26 05/25/01 Fri
Hey guys!
I will be on and off today b/c I dont feel well and my nurse is coming at I dunno what time she will be here at.
J-Skee I am sorry you having trouble with certian people, it stinks and even though I have not been in this postion before but I think I have a idea what it must feel like. You really should come out for awhile. Transfer to our JCPennys for a month so that you still have income. You can live in my old room at J's, lol you live with her!
I am sure you may remeber vagly when we thought my dad was gonna quit work? Well, we are at the point again. If given the chance today he is gonna tell his boss to stop lieing and stop being dishoest or his is going byebyebye. This is a semi-scary thing cause his thingy he has makes his brain not as god as it was. PLus, John lets him miss all that work yet pays dad (dad "repays" by working extra time to make it up) plus, our house is on his property, as is Janie's. So one more stress log added to the fire. I am trying so hard not to be depressed. Everytime I try to make a effort to be happy something else happens and it is just like ugh.
Janie had a allergic reaction to a med yesterday. It started out that her head/neck was stuck turned to the right, no matter what she did it wour NOT move, so one of the guys werehh she ws getting her hair done(husband of her lady, small company so they know each other) and on the way there she wasn't able to talk, he jaw totalt clenched, it was scary! We all thought she wss having a stroke. So she slept here last night and prob will tonight too. This is one of those meds that has to build up in your system before it works, she had taken three pills. It also taked awhile to get out of you, so she isn't supposed to do anything for three days. My nurse called while my parents were at the ER and I told her what happend and she (jokingly) said "I am just not gonna ask how you guys are amymore! You life is one big drama" LOL
My chest also decided it wants to hurt again, so last night I was in AWFUL pain, which is why I wasn't on much.
I prob post some pics before the night is done. and when I get a chance I will get on IM, sometimes I have pics i got from the day before or got before I had to go and I post as I leave so if I ya see a pic and me not online that prob what happens. I'm grumpy too, beware! LOl J/K!!! I lve ya'll too much to be grumpy at you..i save that for my fam *grin*
**hugs**
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- venting -- j-skee, 20:49:09 05/24/01 Thu
Okay ladies it is time for me to vent a little bit. I just hope they have no intenstions of coming this way to see. Catherine I guess just seems to think it is okay to still flirt with Josh just because I have decided to try and let things go. This is so annoying to me I can't even tell you. She just tries to milk all she can from every situation. Its like heavan forbid she isnt the center of attention. Of course I am still failing to see what she has to ofer over me. But I guess that is an answer that I am never going to get. I right now am trying not to be to angry and upset as heck. But sometimes things are just getting to be to much for me.
Oh boy c-skee I now have a dilema. I forgot that I mentioned doing something with you and I told Matt that my saturday was free. So I thought if it was okay with him and okay with you the three of us could to go a movie or something. I should be home after 6pm on saturday because I am going to the house to see Derek and Jessica all dressed up for prom. Give me a call and we can talk about it.
I love and miss you guys so much. Right now I wish I were in Cali with you guys just to get away from all of this stuff. It is getting way to annoying for me and I just don't know how to deal with it anymore. When is it going to be my turn. I am so tired of waiting. Why so I feel so cursed and why do I feel like I am being punished for something I know I didnt do wrong. I hope to maybe see someone tomorrow. If not I will talk to you later.
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- uhhhhhhhhh -- j-skee, 22:26:09 05/22/01 Tue
I really don't even know what I am up to today. Its been an on and off day with my emotions. Lots of highs and lots of lows. I went to work today and didn't get to go to lunch until 2pm. I just don't know how I made it through the morning. I felt totally i'll and i had this awful cramping in my abdomin (not period I had that last week). I felt great and was much more peppy after lunch. Than I got home and was down hill again. Than it started to pour buckets of rain so I decided to go out in the rain and get soaked, literally from head to toe. It was great, it made me feel good. It was kind of invigorating. Than this evening I watch The Legend of Bagger Vance. I thought it was good. Than in the last hour or so I have been feeling down in the dumps again. I don't know how much longer I will be on but I was hoping to at least see a glimps of someone. I don't have to work tomorrow or thursday. YIPPIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I need a break. I am so emotionally and physically exhausted I think I could faint. I am going to be all on my lonesome this saturday night. Catherine is going to Richmond and stay in night and Josh is going to DC to visit with his brother and his wife over the weekend so I wont have anyone to hang out with me so I think that I might just have to see what c-skee is up to and maybe the two of us could do something. Other wise I might just hang out with my mother after I go and see Derek and Jessica all dressed up for prom. Well thats about it for right now. I love you guys.
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- ROTFLOL!! -- Silver, 04:37:10 05/24/01 Thu
Okay, so here I am, 3 AM, studying for finals like the good procrastinator that I am, and I'm downloading stuff -- mp3's mostly -- when I found a video of Westlife singing Uptown Girl. Apparently, they released it as a single over in Europe. Now, I've always wanted to hear *NSYNC do a cover of that Billy Joel song...I think they'd sound GREAT! But since they didn't and probably won't, I decided to check out Westlife do a live performance on VIVA (our boys have been on that show too). And my lord, I've got the biggest laugh of the day (not counting the NSYNC Antidrug thing since it's past 12 so that counted as yesterday)!! They got totally cheezy moves to go with the song and they're not even in sync, LOL!!! One guy looks petrified, another looks like he didn't have a CLUE what he was doing, and the rest looked like they were on a sugar high (or something else, who knows?). They sang decently though...didn't butcher the song. But lordy, the choreography is to die for, LOL!!! If I ever catchy our guys doing that, I'm going to slap them silly. That is if I could get through security...
Anyways, had to share. I'm going to watch the video again. The laughing is waking me up, LOL!
Night!
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- update on my pathetic life -- j-skee, 19:41:24 05/19/01 Sat
Okay ladies I know that Anna is not there but I know that silver is and so is c-skee. Okay I know that this is probably going to make certain people on this board very upset with me but I have had more than one drink this evening and I am feeling a little bit buzzed right now and that is not helping me feel any better. Actually drinking does more to depress a person and I am headed in that direction. I have to remind myself not to do this again. I hope that you guys are not to disapointed in me for doing this but I was not in the greatest of moods and this is the the wrong way to deal with it. I need to go so that catherine can use the phone. I love and miss you guys so much that I wish I were there instead of here so that my miserable life would not seem so miserable. Talk to you guys soon.
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- tired -- j-skee, 21:41:44 05/21/01 Mon
Yippie inventory is finally over. I went to work last night (sunday) at about 4pm and got out around 12:45am. Than i had to be at work this morning. So I have not had a lot of time to think about much of anything. I am so happy to see you home Anna. I am glad that the trip went well. I'm with c-skee lets bring him home with us. Ya know it never even crossed my mind to go home for a night or two, but I just don't feel like doing that. There really isnt a comfortable bed there for me to sleep on. I have been over to the house a couple of times though and I am calling and talking to my mother as much as possible. Sometimes she is the only thing that helps me make it through a day, and of course knowing you guys are here to support me helps sooooooooooooooooooooooo much. It seems as though my brother Derek is a little worried about me as well, or at least so says a girl I work with that is in one of his classes at school. Now tell me that isnt the sweetest thing you have ever heard. He has grown up so much in the last year and it is an amazing thing to see. Well ladies I have got to go to bed. I love and miss you guys so mcuh. I am off on Wed so I will come by tomorrow night, even if it is late and see if I can catch anyone. Love you guys.
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- maybe gone -- A, 20:02:59 05/21/01 Mon
Hello!
Stopping in to say hi.
Cskee it would be fun to have you both back again!
I may not be on again. I know I said when I moved I wodl be here more! LOl but with this trip and me feeling like this I just been haning out not doing much of anything. Plus tonight is 7Th heaven. Not that the TV show is ore importent then you =P
I will try to post a few pics
loves ya'll and silver get better girl!
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- home again,home again hippity hop -- A-Skee, 18:58:19 05/20/01 Sun
oookk this got REALLY I am sorry! I should have made it shorter my editeding it all again but i am way to tired, feel free to skim, I won't be hurt. Anywho I am gonna stick in the reply since it long
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-
SLOW DANCE -- Silver, 15:27:00 05/20/01 Sun
SLOW DANCE
Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask "How are you?"
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say "Hi"?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.
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- Checkin' in -- Silver, 23:47:14 05/17/01 Thu
Hi J-Skee {{{hugs}}}. So glad you're feeling better. It's a start, ya know? You'll be as good as new soon enough, if you let yourself. :-) The flowers, card, etc. was such a sweet gesture on C-Skee's part. I agree that's what so great about having friends! They're there when ya need them. I know Anna left today...I was so busy with my project I didn't get a chance to say good bye. I hope she has a safe flight and that her port stuff works out okay. Little S-Skee here caught a little cold, which is really bad timing considering finals are here, but she didn't have a choice. :-( I'll check back in soon. Love ya guys!
Btw, here's a link to download the mp3. I'm really anxious to hear what you guys think of their new song. I'd say it's radically different from what they sounded like when we first got to know each other back in the day. If that doesn't work, go to www.n-tense.net and download it from their site.
Ok, time for bed. Night ladies!
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- new song -- j-skee, 21:02:52 05/16/01 Wed
Okay I know the new song is out and I heard just a little snipp of it on the radio tonight and I am desperate to hear the full version of the song. I guess I am just going to have to be patient and wait to hear it on the radio. We have a new radio station that is awesome so I know that they will play it again.
I'm doing okay today. C-skee brought me some flowers and a teddy bear and a magazine and a little card to cheer me up, isnt that the sweetest thing in the world. Its nice to have friends like that. I'm not saying that I am close to 100% but I hope in due time I will get there and feel better about myself. I just have to have faith and hope that things will eventually work out the way they should. Heck maybe even one day things will go just a little in my direction. All I ask is for a little, not a lot.
I love and miss you guys a lot. I probably wont find out until June if I have more vacation hours, but if I do you can be sure that I am going to be coming out to visit. It will be good for me to just get away. I kinda agree with my brother Chris and Amy that I probably should just try and get out of cville all together, for at least a little while. It is something I am going to have to think long and hard about. But I might try and save some money. See how things go and either head to Atlanta for a month or to San Diego. I just have to decide where it is I will go. I think I am getting way to wrapped up in my own self pitty and fear that it is driving me into a hole so deep I might not be able to climb out of it.
Okay so silver so how are exams????????? Going well I hope. I know that Anna left today for the east coast. Sooooooooooooooooo close yet soooooooooooooooooooo far away. Isnt it such a shame. Well ladies I think I should go. I love ya all lots and lots. Thank you soooooooo much for all your support and love and advice the last couple of days. I will probably continue to need it and I know you all will be here to comfort me. Love you guys.
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- bad luck j-love (thats my new name) -- j-skee, 19:53:23 05/15/01 Tue
Well ladies I talked to Catherine this evening and sure enough he likes her and not me. But she told me that she said to him that she valued our friendship more and wouldnt get involved. I'm still though trying to figure out how come it is that every guy that I ever like doesn't like me back. Can anyone give me an explanation as to why guys don't seem to like me when I like them. I'm fine with guys liking me that I don't like. This is one of those "I told you so" situations, because I told myself not to get carried away and start to like him, but what did I do. Got totally carried away and now it hurts like hell. At least I guess I can move on from here. Thank you guys so much for all your support. I am still going to need it because I am having a difficult time gaining back my confidence in myself. I just don't know what to do with myself anymore. I wish I could see you guys. I wish I could just get away from this place for a week to sort my mixed up life out and get away from him. But right now that really isnt an option for me since I don't have any money to take a week off work and fly across the country. Maybe in a month or so I will be able to. We shall see. I love and miss you guys so much. Talk to you soon.
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- byes byes -- A, 17:28:38 05/15/01 Tue
Hello my friends that I haven't seen in awhile and now wont see you until 4 days =( I prob won't be on today, I am resting and storeing up my energy for this trip. I hope the trip will seem longer then it is, eps my time with my kids. I hope they remeber be (eps John) sounds kinda silly but it would make me very sad!
I also hope my mothers fam will behave, well the trouble maker will behave. As you know(about me not being sick) her fam is not too nice to her or the rest of us, It is very good bets and I are going cause mom can't handle them (if they get nasty) by herself.
Betsy and mom can't sleep on the plane, I dunno if I can, I prob could, so we got games and smae puzzles and stuff to do on our nice long plane trip!
I will miss you guys soooooo much! Jlove I hope something is going better for ya! Hang in there! Silver if you have tests I hope they get well. Still have kittnes clove?
See ya guys when I get back!
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- Picture #4 -- A, 17:47:01 05/07/01 Mon
Pictures!
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- Chris signing-lance-Joey-vid clip-caps from nsync.com video -- A, 19:30:08 05/07/01 Mon
- There be a bunch of pics today since I haven't done it in awhile. If no one is looking or whatever let me know and I will stop. I know, I know, i say this all the time and I know ya?ll are busy so I understand why you don?t reply to all of them, lol so I just ask every now and then to make sure =) (pic of erik s-skee) -- A, 18:08:59 05/09/01 Wed
- bunch of chris, screen capsfrom TRL etc etc new Tiger Beat(cute jc and lance, other then lance shirt looks like it threw up his breakfast*grin*) TRL caps -- A, 21:21:47 05/10/01 Thu
- Chris in Toronto -- A, 19:47:04 05/14/01 Mon
- Wade was on Oprah and they showed some Nsync stuff, here are some caps, some etc pics too****There will only be a few pics today and tomarrow since I will be gone! ahhh S-Skee I will post less pics now**** -- A, 19:52:27 05/14/01 Mon
- Cover of EW coming out on thursday-etc-J-14 cover-large pic of lance -- A, 20:09:06 05/14/01 Mon
- its official -- j-skee, 20:50:08 05/13/01 Sun
Okay ladies its official I have cracked. I don't know what to do. I don't know what is wrong but right now I am going to go insane. My whole body is shaking and I just spent the last 15 minutes curled up in a ball on the floor. I'm so beyond normal right now that I need to cry and I can't. My insides feel like they are melting and my mind has gone to mush. Guys I don't know what to do. I don't feel like I want to live through the night. I have been the biggest con artist to myself for way to long. I think I fooled myself into thinking things were going okay when they they really were falling apart. I don't want to go on feeling this way. I don't know what to do. I have got to get control of myself. Catherine is next door with the guys and they havent even come to look for me or find out what is wrong. That does not make me feel good in my state of mind right now. I am trying so hard right now to keep control of myself. I love you guys a whole bunch and will try and come on tomorrow night and let you guys know how I am doing.
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