Subject:  Re: Exclusive |
Author:
muzmacol
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Date Posted: 17:41:25 09/22/04 Wed
In reply to:
Anon
's message, "Exclusive" on 10:09:46 09/22/04 Wed
>ISA STAR WARNED: "SHAPE UP OR SHIP OUT!"
>
>ISA player, Bryan Coleman, is reported to be in an
>emotionally fragile state following the shock
>announcement by long-term girlfriend, Heidi, that she
>would be leaving him if he did not address his
>escalating weight problem.
>
>Coleman (26) is known to have taken the news badly and
>only last Sunday, was seen out with fellow players and
>the ISA manager, Scott Ditchfield, on a lengthy
>drinking session at the Oaklands pub in Hoole (a
>popular venue for the ISA players). A source close to
>Coleman described it is an emotionally difficult time
>for the much maligned full back. The source stated
>that "Bryan has had a difficult year in terms of
>confidence. His rapid hair loss has hit him hard and
>now this! I just feel terrible for him"
>
>Coleman was believed to have intentions to marry his
>beloved girlfriend of over a year, and was cheekily
>dubbed 'Lord of the Rings' by fellow ISA stars
>following an apparent sighting outside the 'Bargain
>Jewels, jewellery discount magastore' in Wrexham. At
>the time, Coleman was quoted as saying that it was
>"the happiest point in his life so far" and he added
>that "being with this fine woman is better than
>scoring a late equaliser on Wezzy Park and saving a
>five-a-side penalty in Blackpool all rolled into one!"
>
>Whilst the warning from Heidi was only described by
>her as a "suggestion", it is believed that she has
>issued an ultimatum whereby Coleman lose the estimated
>3 stone of excess by the end of this year or face the
>prospect of "line dancing alone".
>
>A source close to Heidi stated that she "very upset
>and distressed" by recent events. Heidi is believed
>to have confided in friends, asking for advice on how
>to straighten out her man. In a candid interview with
>a national magazine, Heidi described the problems
>faced within their home. "Bryan can be a nice guy at
>times and I love him to pieces. But I do get fed up
>when I'm promised sex, only to have to peel him off
>the sofa in a pool of his own bodily fluids following
>14 cans of Stella at 8 in the evening"
>
>Heidi also expressed concerns regarding Coleman's hair
>loss stating that "I recently saw pictures of Bryan
>taken a few years ago when he played for the Highfield
>and I was shocked! He had a trim figure and thick
>curtains for a hair-do! My! just a fringe would be
>nice now, even without the curtains!" Notwithstanding
>her concerns, Heidi is believed to have agreed to stay
>with Coleman to see if the widely held belief that
>bald men are more virile is, in fact, true. Sources
>close to Heidi revealed that thus far, she has been
>sorely disappointed.
>
>The couple are rarely out of the public eye and only
>two months ago, came fourth in a national line dancing
>contest. Bryan described the moment as "magical" and
>he also spoke of his "secret love for the dance" even
>though he conceded that he received "some proper pain"
>from his ISA team mates.
>
>Coleman is also believed to have spent colossal
>amounts of money in gambling establishments and was
>seen recently in 'Mecca Bingo' collecting sizable
>winnings following a long night at 'the table'.
>
>It is thought that Coleman has investigated the
>possibility of joining a gymnasium such as the
>'Crabwall Manor Spa and Health Club' (frequented by
>some of the ISA's fittest and most dedicated players).
> Sources close to Coleman have stated that he has now
>made the decision to "jib that off" and opt for the
>Slimfast plan instead.
>
>Coleman's team mates are said to be "right behind him"
>and a source within the dressing room stated "Nobody
>likes to make fun of Bryan - it just isn't the ISA way
>of doing things. We will continue to give Bryan the
>support and respect we have always done".
>
>Supporters echoed the sentiments. Celebraty Season
>ticket holder, darts star, Lee 'Prince of the Port'
>Miller, stated that the supporters would stick with
>Coleman no matter what. Miller stated "Although the
>lad may not be the greatest player in the world, he
>remains a popular figure within the terraces at the
>Imps". "It's easy to forget what a great servant he's
>been for this club". Miller later clarified that by
>saying that "To be fair, I guess it's not actually
>that easy to forget, the **** reminds us every five
>minutes!"
>
>It must be said, Bryan is lucky to have such a
>supportive group around him and hopefully we will all
>see him bounce back soon.
Thats not fair! It was definatley Elizabeth Duke @Argos!
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