Author:
Socrates down under
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Date Posted: 15:27:17 11/17/07 Sat
Author Host/IP: r220-101-162-87.cpe.unwired.net.au/220.101.162.87
In reply to:
Socrates down under
's message, "The Philosopher's Stone" on 15:08:28 11/17/07 Sat
Great Philosophical Answers (smart ass, of course)
No:1
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat, she said, 'Sir, I need to see your ticket - not your stub.'
No:2
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any
bigger?'
The stock boy replied, 'No ma'am, they're dead.'
No:3
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. 'Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!'
A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, 'What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?'
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, 'Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand.'
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