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Welcome to Crzy House!

The New Updated
CRZY HOUSE Centerfold Parade



No one runs a campaign like our very own Lance.
Visit his hilarious official campaign web site!
Friends of Lance


Letters For Robbie Kirkland
A 14 year old boy who took his life because of homophobia.


Flowers For Robbie
Every year people from Crzy House have flowers put on Robbie's grave.

Read about & Report Hatecrimes Here


Would you like to see gays have equal rights in your lifetime?
Then DO SOMETHING! VOTE!
Your Vote Counts!

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Please visit my memorial site for Matthew Shepard
Remembering Matthew

In Memory Of Justin The Okie
We miss you.

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While we may be lighthearted at times, the core mission of this MB is serious gay activism. While this is an online community, it is primarily a tool to disseminate information regarding the latest in gay rights issues. Unnecessary distractions are not only unwelcome, but will be removed at the discretion of the board administrators.

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  • THIS is what happens when I write nasty emails to people I don't know -- Joseph Bernicky -- Brian "Joe" Bernicky, 09:50:47 03/01/17 Wed
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    Brian "Joe" Bernicky is accused of committing a sexual battery on an adult female in February 2010 and a warrant was obtained for his arrest in January 2011. He has been sought ever since by local law enforcement and was located yesterday and booked on the charge with a $500,000 bond.

    Throughout the course of the investigation and since the warrant was issued, Bernicky eluded interviews with investigators and changed residences several times. As a result, he was considered a fugitive from justice and listed publicly as one of Clay County's Most Wanted criminals.






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  • Is Ted Cruz, born in Canada, eligible to run for president? --

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    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Can Ted Cruz run for president if he was born in Canada?

    The Republican senator from Texas says he can. And just to be sure, hes taking the extra step of renouncing the Canadian citizenship he says he didnt even know he had.

    Cruz -- full name: Rafael Edward Cruz --was born in Canada in 1970 because his father was working for the oil industry there. The senators recently released birth certificate shows his mother was born in Delaware and his father was born in Cuba. The Cruz family left Canada a few years later. Cruz grew up in Texas and graduated from high school there, later attending Princeton University and Harvard Law School.

    By virtue of his American-born mother, Cruz, 42, considers himself a natural born citizen and eligible to run for president.

    So is he eligible? The vast majority of legal thought and arguments indicate he is.

    Is there the tiniest sliver of uncertainty? Yes, theres that, too.

    Constitutional requirements

    The Constitution says any candidate for president must be 35 years of age, a resident within the United States for 14 years and a "natural born citizen."

    Weve looked at the question of natural born citizenship before. Back in 2008, people raised questions about the "natural born" citizenship status of both major party candidates.

    Weve fact-checked several statements about President Barack Obamas place of birth and his birth certificate. Obama was born in Honolulu, Hawaii, and his mother was a U.S. citizen. His father was Kenyan.

    We also looked at the case of John McCain, who was born in the Panama Canal Zone because his American father served in the military. McCain, the 2008 GOP nominee, saw his standing briefly challenged in court.

    Interestingly, both of McCains potential Democratic opponents -- Obama and then-Sen. Hillary Clinton -- co-sponsored a Senate measure to settle McCains eligibility. The April 2008 resolution said, "John Sidney McCain, III, is a 'natural born Citizen' under Article II, Section 1, of the Constitution of the United States."

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    So what is a "natural born" citizen? The Constitution doesnt specifically say.

    In 2008, we reviewed research and polled several legal experts. The consensus was that someone is a "natural born" citizen if they have citizenship at birth and dont have to go through a naturalization process to become a citizen.

    If thats the definition, then Cruz is a natural born citizen by being born to an American mother and having her citizenship at birth. (This same logic would apply to Obama, even if he were born in another country, which he wasnt.)

    The Congressional Research Service published a report on the issue after the 2008 election; the agency is tasked with providing authoritative research to all members of Congress. It, too, supported the thinking that "natural born" citizenship means citizenship held "at birth."

    But the Supreme Court -- the ultimate arbiter of constitutional questions -- has never ruled on the matter. And that means a note of uncertainty remains.

    Sarah H. Duggin, a professor of law at Catholic University, has written about and studied the issue extensively. She told us in 2008 that the question of natural born citizenship is "one of the most deceptively simple, complex issues."

    We reached her again this week to ask about Cruzs eligibility. "It would be reasonable to interpret the Constitutions natural born citizenship provision to include children born abroad to U.S. citizens, including Senator Cruz, for a number of reasons," she said.

    But is it 100 percent sure?

    "Unfortunately, we cannot say for sure without either a definitive Supreme Court ruling, or an amendment to clarify the Constitution."

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  • 8 Dumb Quotes About Science From New NASA Overseer Ted Cruz --

    NORMAN BATES

    , 20:41:53 03/23/15 Mon
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    The new Republican-led Congress is currently busy picking people to chair its many committees and subcommittees. Guess what! Tea Party hero Senator Ted Cruz is the new chair of the Subcommittee on Space, Science and Competitiveness. That means he will oversee NASA. Yepthe climate-denying Tea Party hero who tried to defund NASA is now in charge of NASA.

    It's may be a bit extreme to say that Cruz hates NASA. But it doesn't really seem like he loves the world's greatest space agency, since he tried to slash its funding a couple years ago. Cruz is also the lawmaker who helped orchestrate the government shutdown, a 16-day-long disaster that did irreparable damage to scientific research, including work being done at NASA. Meanwhile, Marco Rubiowho also wants NASA to get less fundingwill oversee the NOAA as chair of the Subcommittee on Oceans, Atmosphere, Fisheries and Coast Guard.

    Even though Cruz is from Houston, home of Johnson Space Center, there's reason to believe that he'll continue his pursuit of trying to deflate the space agency. Heck, just look at all the dumb things he's said about science in recent years.

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  • How Big Dick, his hardened cock, and chicks, might get to meet excited pussy. -- christopheranton (Sated.), 13:18:22 12/19/10 Sun
    Sometimes a pussy can get very itchy. There was once a young girl whose pussy was so itchy, that it was painful to look at that pussy. The poor pussy was just scratching all the time.
    "Oh what can I do to soothe this poor pussy" the poor girl said.
    "Why cant I have a normal pussy"?
    "It's not nice to play with your pussy with your fingers, when your pussy is itchy all the time. Sometimes it can be a very smelly pussy as well. My, once silky, pussy is now just a messy pussy"

    Her mother, who knew more about the care of distressed pussies than she did, suggested that she take her pussy into town, and show her distressed and messy itchy pussy to the vet.

    "Big Dick, the chicken farmer from up the road, had big problems with his cock, which was a very soft cock, and didnt have the hardness and drive that you would expect from a cock that needed to service twenty chicks. So he showed his soft cock to the man in town, and the vet showed him how massageing his cock could make his cock hard all the time, and then his cock could satisfy any amount of chicks".
    "so" her mother said, "if the vet can satisfy the cock of Big Dick, he should have no problem sorting out your itchy pussy.

    So the young girl went to town, and the vet looked at her itchy pussy. He didnt mind that her pussy was smelly either. This man was used to itchy and smelly pussies. He saw pussies like that all the time.
    He even stroked her pussy, and played with the excited pussy with his fingers. The young girl liked this. It was nice to have a good man stroking and playing with her pussy. He might even have licked her pussy, but her pussy was a bit smelly, and men dont lick smelly pussies.

    The vet gave her some lotion to spray on her pussy, so that her pussy would not be itchy any longer. He also gave her a prescription for some special pussy wash, that she could bathe her pussy in, so that she should not have a smelly pussy any longer. She might have a wet pussy for a while, but pussies can be dried, and after that she would have a perfect pussy.
    Then Big Dick, the chicken farmer from earlier, could leave off massageing his hardening cock, and he might play with her pussy with his fingers, or stroke her pussy with his manly hands.
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    Big Dick might even introduce her pussy to his hardened cock, and his twenty chicks. If the liked each other that would be good.

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  • A lovely silky pussy and Great Tits. -- christopheranton (Sated.), 18:47:27 12/14/10 Tue
    Read the hilarious article that twisted the knickers of the prudes at Hubpages .

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  • Great Tits and a lovely silky pussy. -- christopheranton (Sated.), 10:57:55 12/14/10 Tue
    The woman next door has a pair of great tits; not blue tits, or tom tits, but great tits. She doesnt have great boobies. Boobies live on the island of Guam, along with a load of U.S servicemen, but there are no boobies to be seen in my part of London, just a pair of great tits, which live with the man who lives next door. I say live with him, because the great tits in question are his wifes great tits. She feeds them, and she put up a titbox to contain the great tits, so essentially the tits are hers. How lucky is that man? His wife has great tits.

    She also has a lovely silky pussy. If I stand at my bedroom window, I can sometimes see her great tits and her lovely silky pussy in her garden. Once I managed to reach over the fence, and stroke her pussy, but I have not yet managed to get my hands on her great tits.
    It's seldom that I get to see her tits and her pussy at the same time. When she is letting her silky pussy have an airing in the garden her tits are seldom to be seen. I expect they are wary of the pussy. I do wish I could stroke her silky pussy, and see her great tits at the same time. Her husband can, I expect. He can stroke pussy in the bedroom and look out the window, and see great tits in his garden.

    Both the husband and wife are on holidays now. They are gone to The Seychelles, for three weeks. They should be back just before Christmas. This I really like because the husband has given me the keys of the house. I am to look after his wifes silky pussy, and her great tits while they are away. He even asked me if I would mind playing with his wife's pussy. He told me that he had seen me stroking her pussy over the fence, and that he would like me to stroke it while they were on holidays. His wife, and her pussy would like me to do it as well.

    I was also given instructions in the care of her great tits. Since it is winter, it is very important to remember to feed the birds. The best thing to do is to make a bird cake. This is very easy to do. You can buy mixed bird seed in the pet shop or the supermarket. If you have a market near you, go there. The seed is a lot cheaper than you will buy in the shops. Get some peanuts and some sunflower seeds if you can. Mix it up with some melted lard. Add some porridge meal as well. Use a bowl or container that you wont be using for anything else. When it is all mixed up properly, put it in your freezer for about an hour for it to set, and then leave it out for the birds.
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    Anyway, to return to our story, that will be my pleasure for the next two weeks. I look forward to engaging in social intercourse with my nieghbour's wife's eminently strokable silky pussy, and her perky great tits.
    I almost feel sorry for those U.S servicemen on Guam. They probably dont get to see great tits like I do, or the man next door. Still, there is always the boobies.

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  • Three men in my hole wont play with my pussy. -- christopheranton (Sated.), 12:52:41 12/05/10 Sun
    There is a man in my hole, there are three men altogether, but there is usually only one in my hole at one time. The other two are stationed, one in the hole of my next door neighbour,(an indian takeaway), and the other one is in the hole of the carpet shop owner at the end of the terrace. Sometimes the man in my hole will shout to one or both of the men in the neighbours' holes. "Are you pulling it" or "can you see it yet"?

    The man has been in my hole for approximately one week already. Although he has not been there right round the clock. He leaves my hole in the evenings, and he has not been near my hole at the weekend. The intrusions into my neighbours' holes cease at evenings and weekends also.

    Having, sometimes, up to three men in my hole has been difficult to endure. It is not very easy to concentrate on your work when a workman is probing your hole at the same time. My pussy doesnt really like to see them there either. I have had to watch my pussy very carefully because the men are in my hole. The danger is that my pussy might end up in the hole, with or without one of the men. I dont want my pussy to get dirty or wet. Nor do I want any of the men leaving my hole and fondling my pussy with their grubby hands. My pussy is splayed out on the bed as I write this. Bed is the best place for my pussy to be while those dirty men are in my hole.

    The reason why my hole is occupied by three men, and my pussy is spread out on the bed, is quite simple really.
    The staff of the indian restaurant next door are assholes. They have dirty habits. They pour fat down the drains. This blocks up the system, and the contents of the drains back up and flood into the basement of the carpet shop at the end of the terrace. The manhole that provides access to the sewers is situated in the centre of my garden, and that is the reason why I have three men in my hole, to the great inconvenience of me and my furry pussy.

    Such are the perils of city life, when your neighbours are ignorant or thick, or both. The annoying thing about it really is that the offender,(the indian takeaway) is not paying for the men in my hole. The victim,(the carpet shop owner), gets that pleasure. In addition to all the fat in my hole, the men now tell me that my hole is blocked up by babies' nappies. I can conclude, from this information, that there has been a recent addition to the family next door. I just wish that they would dispose of their disposables responsibley. I am fed up with my hole getting jammed up with dirty nappies. My hole was made for better things.

    I hope that the men will be leaving my hole soon, and that it will be a long time before my hole requires a similar probing and scouring. I would like to take my pussy out for an airing in the garden, but until the men in my hole are gone that will not be possible.

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  • Three men in my hole. -- christopheranton (Sated.), 08:43:29 11/28/10 Sun
    There is a man in my hole, there are three men altogether, but there is usually only one in my hole at one time. The other two are stationed, one in the hole of my next door neighbour,(an indian takeaway), and the other one is in the hole of the carpet shop owner at the end of the terrace. Sometimes the man in my hole will shout to one or both of the men in the neighbours' holes. "Are you pulling it" or "can you see it yet"?

    The man has been in my hole for approximately one week already. Although he has not been there right round the clock. He leaves my hole in the evenings, and he has not been near my hole at the weekend. The intrusions into my neighbours' holes cease at evenings and weekends also.

    Having, sometimes, up to three men in my hole has been difficult to endure. It is not very easy to concentrate on your work when a workman is probing your hole at the same time. My pussy doesnt really like to see them there either. I have had to watch my pussy very carefully because the men are in my hole. The danger is that my pussy might end up in the hole, with or without one of the men. I dont want my pussy to get dirty or wet. Nor do I want any of the men leaving my hole and fondling my pussy with their grubby hands. My pussy is splayed out on the bed as I write this. Bed is the best place for my pussy to be while those dirty men are in my hole.

    The reason why my hole is occupied by three men, and my pussy is spread out on the bed, is quite simple really.
    The staff of the indian restaurant next door are assholes. They have dirty habits. They pour fat down the drains. This blocks up the system, and the contents of the drains back up and flood into the basement of the carpet shop at the end of the terrace. The manhole that provides access to the sewers is situated in the centre of my garden, and that is the reason why I have three men in my hole, to the great inconvenience of me and my furry pussy.

    Such are the perils of city life, when your neighbours are ignorant or thick, or both. The annoying thing about it really is that the offender,(the indian takeaway) is not paying for the men in my hole. The victim,(the carpet shop owner), gets that pleasure. In addition to all the fat in my hole, the men now tell me that my hole is blocked up by babies' nappies. I can conclude, from this information, that there has been a recent addition to the family next door. I just wish that they would dispose of their disposables responsibley. I am fed up with my hole getting jammed up with dirty nappies. My hole was made for better things.

    I hope that the men will be leaving my hole soon, and that it will be a long time before my hole requires a similar probing and scouring. I would like to take my pussy out for an airing in the garden, but until the men in my hole are gone that will not be possible.

    I do wish my neighbours could be more responsible.

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  • When a pussy gets too wet. -- Pussy Cat. (Shagged rotten), 19:04:41 11/05/10 Fri
    Things really went tits up for my pussy one day. It really was one of the worst boobs made by a pussy ever. You see I live near a town called Milf ord Haven, which is in England but not in the county of Middle sex. I had to go fetch my three young schoolgirls from school, and I knew that if I was late they would be girls gone wild, as they would be left standing at the gates. I was looking forward to seeing their teacher, who I really fancied, although I thought that she might be one of those lesbians, or have a leaning towards lesbianism, as she never responded to my tentative advances. I felt a twinge of sadness. She didnt exactly have Pamela Anderson's body, and her salary would never exactly put her in the Paris Hilton league. Still since I have been forced to put all thoughts of Jessica Simpson, Jenna Jameson, Carmen Electra, and girls of their quality out of my mind, I guess the sexy teacher ought to do just fine, that is so long as she isnt really a lesbian. Perhaps I could get her a present. Would she like an Eminem CD? Could I get her a souvinir Eminem T shirt on e bay. I could write her some poetry. Maybe she likes games. It would be easy to buy her some computer games. I could offer her some links to games cheat sites. That might impress.
    My last wife was a disaster. She definitely came off the 50 cent shelf. She could certainly be counted amongst the dogs. The last I saw of her was her nude body in our marital bed, as she conducted convoluted negotiations with a strange man, who I later found out was a salesman who travelled in the Sus sex area near Brighton. I walked out of the house that day, and didnt return until she had taken her badass of with her paramour. I always feel a slight frisson when I enter the house after work. I guess I am suffering some delayed kind of shock. That is why I put so much capital into getting to know this teacher. A new girl in bed might help to wipe out painful memories.
    Anyway to return to the story of the wet pussy. It had been raining rather heavily. Her pussy was about the only thing that my wife had left me when she decanted with the salesman from Sus sex. I knew that the pussy had been outside all morning. She was bound to be a very messy wet pussy by now. I called at the door, but there was no sign of the pussy. I had to go hunt around for her, because I knew that when my three girls came home from school they would miss her. The girls loved pussies, and that particular pussy especially, probably because it had been my wife's pussy. They still felt that connection.
    After searching around for about ten minutes, calling all the time, I heard a plaintive "meoau" coming from underneath a hedgerow at the bottom of our garden. There I found the pussy up to her chest in a pool of water. She had slipped in, and wasnt able to scramble out. I managed to rescue the poor thing. But she really was a very dirty pussy, and a very wet pussy as well. "This pussy is too wet" I said to myself. " I cant just leave her. I knew that I would be a bit late collecting my three girls, but they would be very distressed if they saw their mother's wet pussy. So I borrowed one of my daughters hairdryers, and set to work. Soon everything was back to normal, and I had a silky smooth pussy purring contentedly on the armchair. As I rushed around looking for my carkeys, I heard someone driving up to the door. Who should come rushing in but my three lovely girls, and hot on their heels came the beaming features of the teacher I had been fantasisng about. She explained that she decided to give the girls a lift home herself, and my heart started to flutter when she told me that she also really wanted to get to know me a bit better as well. When she started to stroke the cat, and she rolled over to have her belly tickled I feel the whole family was impressed.
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