Hi again Maha -- DietLowCarb.com

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Date Posted: 16:12:04 05/26/02 Sun
Author: Sherry
Subject: Hi again Maha
In reply to: maha 's message, "Water is my official drink now" on 14:05:46 05/26/02 Sun

Getting a better guy is fine when you are ready. But maybe your first goal is loving yourself and NOT needing a guy for feelings of self worth. There is something about us women that is a little scary, we sometimes tend to define ourselves as who we are in respect to that "special someone".

Having a special someone is nice. Wonderful in fact, but if we invest too much in him and not enough in ourselves, we get those ups and downs of emotion that I was talking about.

A lot of what I was talking about came from some time spent in family therapy with my husband. He isn't very healthy emotionally, was raised in an abusive household, tends to have mood swings etc. What I needed to learn is that my happiness doesn't have to depend on him. If he is being a jerk, I don't have to care. I can simply decide to be happy based on MY own feelings, not his.

It wasn't (and isn't) always easy, but distancing myself that much, realizing that I control my own emotions and don't have to allow him to control them by his behaviour, has made life much easier for both of us.

Self confidence is a wonderful thing. But we can't let someone else decide for us what we are worth. Too often manipulative people can drag you down if you aren't strong enough to stop them. Becoming that strong is your job (and all of ours).

I hope you keep your sunny feelings, I KNOW the diet will help, (just getting the carbs out of your system by itself is a mood lifter). And learning to define yourself by who YOU are, and not by anyone else will help to keep those moods and feelings of self worth strong and healthy.

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I love your attitude!! I gain so much optimism from this site!! (NT) -- Melanie, 06:06:56 05/27/02 Mon