(8) 'And I guess that's why they call it' a review... (8) -- Saturday Night You Bull Sessions

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Date Posted: 00:00:32 05/19/04 Wed
Author: Stupid
Subject: (8) 'And I guess that's why they call it' a review... (8)
In reply to: Patrick Lonergan 's message, "REVIEWS: Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen 05/15/04" on 00:53:50 05/15/04 Sat

Okay, I'm down to 'Hmmm's' and 'What I liked'. Stupid Arsenio's lawyers. Also note I added in an additonal comment from R2D2 himself! If you think working that deal out with George Lucas was easy...you're right! Frankly I was quite surprised...I was afraid I'd have to settle for Jar Jar. No offense.

Jar Jar Binks: Mesa no offended.

Yeah...I had to take Jar Jar along was the catch to the R2D2 deal. On with the review:

(Note, I didn't read any of the other reviews until after I wrote this. Stuff in brackets is stuff added AFTER I read other people's reviews. There's really only one other instance of that...a little later on. Sorry, please continue...)

Cold Open:

Hmmm...

-'pisses' could be 'ticks'
-Not sure what 'Jump The Shark is on the tick about so many things with "Full House".' means. Maybe 'tick' could be 'piss'...I kid.
- it might be true but I'm not a fan of stuff like this:

Ashley: Yeah...We'll have a conservative-bashing monologue, a lame commercial parody, a group of conservative-bashing sketches, musical performances by some here-today-gone-today "talent", and I use the term loosely, followed by the 12:50 stretch, otherwise known as the "You thought the show's been lame so far? You ain't seen nothin' yet" time period, capped off with some goodnights.

What I liked
-well written, good flow
-Dave Coulier observation
-Ashley and Mary-Kate: THE ROYALTIES! KA-CHING!

R2D2 says:
Be boop, boop beep boop boop

Jar Jar says:
Mesa just happy to be out of the cage!

Monologue:

Hmmm
-"[ despite duel introduction, only Ashley Olsen steps foot onto Home Base ]" , should be Mary Kate Olsen.

What I liked:
-Very nicely written with great flow.
-great overall concept and execution
-good casting choice since Mary Kate is the "wild one".
-crazy ending

R2D2 says:
Bee boop boop beep boop boop. Beep beep beep boop boop.

Jar Jar says:
Mary Kate and Ashley besa legal in a month. Jar Jar legal now!

Private England's Dilemma

Hmmm
-'is putting the flak on us' seems weird.

What I liked
-nice writing, great flow
-great parody concept and execution
-making out thing

R2D2 says:
Beep boop beep boop boop bee boop boop beep boop.

Jar Jar says:
Yousa be having any more pie? Jar Jar not eating for days and days...

Smiles and Frowns:

Frowns:
-Victor: Crap, like usual. I want to kill myself.

Hector: Don�t even joke about stuff like that. I hear we�re popular among the teen crowd and we wouldn�t want to give them any bad ideas.

Victor: I guess you�re right. I urge any teens watching not to drink an entire bottle of rubbing alcohol, found in most medicine cabinets, otherwise you will die.

Maybe it revealed his sadness too quickly? If not even just:

Victor: Crap, like usual. I want to kill myself.
would work.

-didn't get this:

Victor: You know, I always had this secret ambition to be a chemistry teacher. Want to know why I never fulfilled my dream? No, not marks, not money, not even women. It was simply because I was named Victor. That bitch Shelley has caused me no end of trouble.

Smiles
-nicely written, flowed well
-name irony
-clever reasons for why everything made the guy sad
-nice contrast with other dude

R2D2 says:
Boop bee bee boop boop boop.

Jar Jar says:
Oh noooo! JP made big stinky sound!

I did not! That was...R2.

R2D2: BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP!

Anyways, can we move on...

R2D2: Boop boop beep boop beeeh beeeh.

Jar Jar: Smelling like fambaa plop in here.

Anyways...

Team Morale

Hmmm
-poor Sam

What I liked
-nicely written, great flow
-great concept
-the dialogue back and forth with the twins was perfect
-trophies
-Jeremy was my favorite but all were great.

R2D2 says:
Beep boop beep beep bee boop beep boop boop beep. Beep beep beep beep-oop.

Jar Jar Binks say:
Mesa wanna trophy too!

Time after Time:

Well I couldn't possibly comment on my own skit. Why don't I just let R2D2 and Jar Jar Binks do that!

R2D2 says:
(long awkward pause)Beep.
Jar Jar Binks says:
Fambaa plop.

Thanks guys.

Well, thank you R2D2 and Jar Jar Binks but I'm afraid it's back to Skywalker ranch for both of you...

Jar Jar Binks: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!

(intermission)

And we're baaaaaack. I only rented them for half the review. I'm not made out of money. If I was I probably wouldn't walk around in public. People would start grabbing me, trying to tear off a piece of me and stuff and I'd be like 'Ahh no, why did I have to be born with rolls of dimes for fingers.' while some lady is trying to crack open my poor pinky. Man, that would suck.

WU:
-I don't want to give away which jokes were mine so I'm not gonna review it. Yeah, that's the reason...it's not because I'm lazy.

(Okay I noticed in Jen's review she took credit for the Subway commentary and I wanted to say that I really enjoyed it and it's craziness.)

What's in a name

Hmmm
-with Jimmy Fallon gone will this be the last installment of this show?
-I think it's 'pray tell' instead of 'prey tell'
-Porcelain Gum is a funny name, does it mean something weird?
-why were the twins invited on the show? There was much said about them except for the fact they were identical twins. Maybe that's part of the joke?
-I felt out of the loop on some jokes

What I liked
-good writing, good flow
-top 6 list was excellent

R2D2 says:
he left.
Jar Jar Binks says:
he left too.

Donald Rumsfield

Hmmm

-Tom Brokaw intro confused me
-'Anyone who dies in combat is a friggin� moron!' doesn't seem to fit.
-'Come on, folks�it�s the American way! If you have a problem with that, then stick your thumb up you butt and we�ll come and get ya!' doesn't seem to fit

What I liked

-the writing was good
- 'Donald Rumsfeld: Missy, our country is at war! Don�t question my authority! I�m a man�you�re a woman. Let�s not confuse things!'. As a non sequitor(nonsense statement kinda thing) that's funny.
-Combat isn�t Jamie Farr runnin� around in dress! Not all the time�some of the time, yes, but not all the time.
-the missy mix up

Double Trouble

Hmm

-'Ed: Me too. Can you tell the waiter my order? I've got to go to the bathroom.'. Instead of 'tell' maybe say 'give'.
-given the Garfield references maybe the restaurant could have been called 'Papa Jon's' or something goofy.

What I liked

-nicely written, good story telling.
-classic mix up thing turning to unexpected craziness
-'Matt: (shouting) And that was for always making fun of my My Little Pony collection! (looks up at the two girls) Wow, he must have really hit me hard. I'm seeing double! (rubs his eyes) Hey, wait, there really are two of you? (looks at Ed's dead body) Crap... '

SpikeTV

-no comment

[Fade out]

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