Ohhh.... if only he could see into her head, he'd have been quick to dispel those thoughts she had. There was a vast and severe difference between not recognizing someone and not caring for the person they had been. The years had been hard on her, so much so that beyond a passing resemblance Paige hadn't a clue that the woman he had loved so deeply was walking away from him. And if he was truly honest with himself -a rare feat these days- He was still in love with her. He had never fully gotten over her, had never forgiven himself for not fighting harder to keep her.
But that was a pain he'd buried so deeply, smothered so completely, that he wasn't even aware of it anymore. He wasn't aware that he was living a half life, that by smothering down that pain and loss, he'd smothered out a portion of his heart and soul. That portion of his soul limped along, fueling his music in a desperate attempt to heal. But his heart... That had withered away to a barely useful monstrosity. He'd simply learned to fake it so well that he'd been fooling himself all these years. You get used to the loss, the pain, after so long... It just becomes a part of who you are. And you forget who you used to be.
He wasn't exactly shocked when she spun on him, when she shouted at him. Hell, he had expected it. She would need to cover her directional change with an attempt to attack. And here she came, storming towards him like she was going to string him up by his balls. And apparently give him a good telling of what exactly he had done wrong in the ten seconds flat that it had taken her to decide he was satin in the flesh. Here it came, something about being an asshole and a pig and.... Wait. What? What he hadn't done? Ten years ago? Had he known her? He doubted it, ten years ago he avoided redheads like the plague.... Still would take a blonde over a redhead to keep old memories buried where they lay.
And if he wasn't confused enough, with the shock dying away into the background of his features. He was just about to tell her that she had him confused with someone else, that he wasn't here ten years ago, he'd been in LA. And then she went and ripped the bandaid and superglue right off those old wounds with a dozen short words.
There was a physical pain in his chest as her words took hold, as he realized that the slim of a battered and bloody creature before him was the woman he'd once loved so very deeply... His stomach rolled, making him feel like he'd had far too much tequila on an empty stomach. His heart felt like it would simply pound right out of his chest, right through his ribs like they were made of tissue paper, and the blood roared in his ears.
He couldn't breath, couldn't think, couldn't say a word. There just wasn't enough room left in his brain to process anything more than the fact that this was his Kat, raging at him just like she had that last night... It was like his worst nightmares had come to haunt him in reality! And he wasn't even sure he was still awake. But then she was stumbling against him, jarring him from this new shock and he realized she had gone far too pale.
Wrapping his arms around her, he supported her weight, fearing she would faint fully this time. He couldn't help but notice the lack of flesh on her body, the way he could feel every bone without even trying. Jesus, how could this be the same woman he'd known a decade before? "God Kitten... What have you done to yourself?" He breathed the words, not even meaning to say them aloud. Even had he spent more time with her, it would have taken him weeks to realize, if only due to the shape she was in. He'd never, in his worst nightmares, thought she could get to this shape, hadn't thought she was this small under all those curves...
Fuck this! He couldn't leave her here, couldn't let her walk away from him without knowing she at least had a roof over her head and a bed to sleep in. If she never wanted to see him again, again, he could live with that. But he couldn't walk away with her like this, he could never bury this! Carefully, he shifted her in his arms, flinching as he felt more of those harsh angles, and pulled her bags from her bony shoulder and let them hit the pavement. She could rage at him all she wanted, he wasn't letting her walk anywhere! He hoisted her and turned to deposit her into the passenger seat of his truck. He guessed her bags probably weighed as much, if not more, than she did. Jesus... What had happened to her?
P A I G E
• D A M A G E D •
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