Stress is a b**ch -- DietLowCarb.com

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Date Posted: 10:38:35 07/17/02 Wed
Author: Katie
Subject: Stress is a b**ch

I was a very skinny little girl. Skinny to the point where someone was always trying to feed me. My mother was always thin, but started gaining weight when I was about 9. She was bit by a dog, and almost killed. She had to have over 100 stitches in her face, and had to drink all of her meals through a straw for over a month. Since cold was the only thing that didn't hurt, she lived on milkshakes.

After she got heavy, my stepfather would start yelling at her that she was making me fat just like her, any time she let me have anything dessert-like. I loved my mom. I was 9 years old. I thought she was perfect. I got to the point that every time he yelled at her, I ate something.

I currently have a whole new set of issues aside from the ones that I developed as a child. This is a little hard for me to talk about, but here goes. I left my husband 4 years ago. I filed for divorce, and he refused to sign the paperwork. So, no divorce. He met someone, filed for divorce, the judge denied his divorce. So, no divorce.

BUT, I just found out that he remarried a year ago, so he committed bigamy. I left the state after I filed for divorce. The police where he lives (Los Angeles) told me to file a complaint where I live. The police where I live (Washington State) told me to file a complaint where he remarried, and the police where he remarried (Las Vegas) told me that they just don't care. Now, I'm receiving letters from his new *wife* telling me that I need to quit contacting him or they will file harassement charges. I contacted the Los Angeles courts, and they don't care that he remarried without waiting for a divorce.

I don't have the money to refile for divorce. My SO's divorce will be final in about 3 months. I want to marry him before my son is old enough to know the difference. I can't stop crying every time that I think about it.

My car is a piece of junk. I can't get my husband to sign off his interest in it, so I can't sell it. Which means that I don't have the downpayment for another car.

It took me 4 months to get my husband to sign the paternity papers stating that he was not my son's father. My SO wanted to be on the birth certificate, but because of the laws here, your husband is automatically listed as the father. I was able to get the DA's office here threaten to make him pay child support. That was the only thing that got him to sign those papers. I'm running out of things to threaten him with to get him to do anything else that I need.

I'm having a little trouble caring what I look like right now. I'm having trouble caring about anything right now. I tried to talk to the doctor about putting me on prozac yesterday, and told her all of this. She told me that I should go to the media. I don't want her advice on resolving the problem. I wanted medication so that I can stop crying long enough to plan and execute resolution.

I hate feeling trapped. I hate feeling like I have absolutely no control over my life and my future. Sometimes the food I eat is the only control that I have left. Right now, I'm trying to control it in positive ways, to choose foods that will make me healthy and strong.

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