Re: The Sneeze by: Patrick Lonergan -- Saturday Night You Bull Sessions

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Date Posted: 06:19:45 05/25/06 Thu
Author: Matteo
Subject: Re: The Sneeze by: Patrick Lonergan
In reply to: Patrick 's message, "Re: The Sneeze by: Patrick Lonergan" on 19:36:55 05/24/06 Wed

I have to admit that I read the sketch with a preconceived notion about what it was going to be like from the description of the sketch that follows the title. I envisioned a boss not so mean as yours but one who just commanded respect. I thought the employees would be clueless about saying God Bless you, and that the boss just couldn't understand this, and simply cannot go on with the meeting until he gets some closure or satisfaction, such as thouroughly admonishing them for their lack of manners and getting them to say God bless you. Reviewers aren't perfect either and I admit I shouldn't have a preconceived notion. I should be completely open to the writers creative vision.

When I did begin to read it, I noticed the boss was very mean and I thought "aha, they are going to refuse to say it simply to pay him no respect either, and he'll sense that, and since he's so controlling, he's going to try to force them to cave in and say it." But I thought it would be best if the boss DID NOT come right out and say what he thought was going on, but that the audience would sense it, and this would cause some tension and interest - is he going to make them cave in and respect him, or are they going to win this small battle, and thus achieve some sense of not always being the ones who get beat?

Of course, there are many directions a sketch can head in. Yours wasn't a terrible direction; I just thought the one I had envisioned was deeper, and probably harder to write. I was a little dissapointed in the direction you chose, because it wasn't very satisfying compared to what I thought it was going to be.

I do prefer deeper sketches. I prefer the writer explore the many directions a sketch can go in, and I respect sketches that go the hard way and fail more than the ones that go the easy way and semi-succeed. To me, it's all about how satisfied a writer is with their sketch and how hard they are willing to think and work. I don't always look for multiple ways to go when I write, I just go with the next thought. But I do usually reread my sketches several times over a period of atleast a few days, and make changes as I see it. And I'm usually dissatisfied with some aspect of it, and sometimes it's frustrating because I can't come up with a way that I think is good. Of course, we can't sit around and wait forever until we can make our sketches perfect.

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