I got few ideas to for sketch, please review -- Saturday Night You Bull Sessions

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Date Posted: 01:31:41 08/10/04 Tue
Author: John Locke
Subject: I got few ideas to for sketch, please review
In reply to: Jim Bevan 's message, "Re: Diner Politics" on 19:13:27 08/09/04 Mon

I grew up in a very small town, and there was nothing to do! So we used to dig up a potato from the farmers field and let it get hot in the sun, then we'd play hot potato! Then after it cooled down a little, we'd pretend it was a dinky car. And then we'd pretend it was a marble, and then a football. It was all we had for fun, a potato!

This woman is at an aerobic kickboxing class kicking and punching a dummy really hard. She's ends with a flurry of punches, then wipes her brow and walks away.
Next, she's walking down a dimly lit street at night. A man suddenly appears in a menacing stance infront of her. She goes into her fighting stance and prepares for his assault. She throws a punch as he lunges at her and it lands on his jaw, but it does not stop him, and his momentum carries him onto her. He falls on top of her. She tries to wrestle him off, but cannot. He pins her arms down and leans his face close to hers. A voice inside her head is heard and it goes "dammit, why didn't it work like when I was hitting the punching bag? The punching bag, the punching bag, just stood there, let me hit it, never once hit back. It tricked me, the damn punching bag led me to believe I could walk these streets at night. Arrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! I hate you punching bag!
Just then the man speaks "I'm Carl Dillard from Realistic Self-defense enterprizes, and I saw you boxersizing at the karate club. I just wanted to let you know in a way that is utterly convincing, that boxersizing will not help you if you are attacked on the streets. It will only give you a false sense of confidance, which may put you in dangerous situations, such as walking in this neighborhood at night alone. We teach eye gouging, biting and knee's to the groin, which you should have done to me. Here's my card."
He puts his card up to her nose. She takes it with one free hand and looks at it, and note, they are still laying down face to face. She says thanks, she thinks she will call.
He get's up and helps her to her feet. They both dust themselves off. He says "you better run home now and not stop, because you're not equipped to defend yourself on the streets in actually street attack situations. Now RUN!"
She runs away as fast as she can. He stands there is gingerly rubs his chin where she hit him.

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Replies:

The kickboxing bit could be put into a sketch. -- Jim Bevan, 06:53:08 08/10/04 Tue
- Re: The kickboxing bit could be put into a sketch. -- John Locke, 20:04:29 08/10/04 Tue