Re: WU jokes for Chappelle's show -- Saturday Night You Bull Sessions

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Date Posted: 12:14:58 08/31/04 Tue
Author: Jim Bevan
Subject: Re: WU jokes for Chappelle's show
In reply to: Jim Bevan 's message, "WU jokes for Chappelle's show" on 12:13:36 08/31/04 Tue

Tina Fey
Brush-ups dancers... Amy Poehler, Fred Armisen, Finesse Mitchell, Seth Meyers

Tina Fey: As the race towards the White House grows more intense, support for President Bush is growing strongly from the Jewish community, as numerous Jewish leaders claim that Bush will do more to strengthen the alliance between the U.S. and Israel, and support for his strong stand against Islamic terrorism. In a related story, John Kerry has tapped Yasir Arafat as his potential Secretary of Defense.

The United Nations has announced that due to continuing human rights violations and atrocities being committed in the Darfur region of Sudan, they will take action to punish the genocidal Muslim rebels by sending them to their rooms without snacks or TV. The original plan called for a slap on the wrist, but it was rejected out of fear that it would be seen as offensive to the Islamic world.

For those angry over the UN's reluctance to fight against the genocidal campaign in Sudan, we at Weekend Update would like to explain how the organization handles international crises. After analyzing the situation the Security Council first asks, "Can we blame this on America?" If the answer is no, they then ask, "Can we at least blame this on Israel?" If the answer to that is no, the council then says, "Screw it, let's go to Wendy's."

NASA has stunned the astronomic world by announcing the discovery of four new planets beyond our solar system. Upon hearing the news President Bush announced that he would extend his campaign trail to those planets to appeal to any potential swing voters.

Tina Fey: A recent economic report has indicated that job growth should rise substantially within the next five years if specific actions are taken, such as the approval of...

(Tina is interrupted when the actors from the Oral B Brush-Ups commercials come on stage, dancing before her and doing their moves as they progress from left to right off camera.)

Dancers (singing): Rip, slip, brush, ah! Rip, slip, brush, ah! Rip, slip, brush, ah! Rip slip, brush (fades out as they leave the set, Tina looks at them oddly)

Tina: I am really getting sick of that commercial.

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Replies:

I hate that commercial too, good idea for the interruption (NT) -- CCS, 14:52:30 08/31/04 Tue
- WU commentary by Alan Keyes -- Jim Bevan, 12:27:05 09/01/04 Wed
  - A late joke, but is it funny? -- Jim Bevan, 21:42:37 09/03/04 Fri