Gotz some crazy shi, wrote it while i had a headache.... peep and critique i think its a little unstreight but also the flow ain�t easy to figure out sometimes -- The Lounge Of Lyricism 2003

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Date Posted: 05:35:27 03/12/03 Wed
Author: chromenine
Author Host/IP: p508F2FA5.dip.t-dialin.net / 80.143.47.165
Subject: Gotz some crazy shi, wrote it while i had a headache.... peep and critique i think its a little unstreight but also the flow ain�t easy to figure out sometimes

I twist my pen again, but I cant think/
Thinkin of the motherland, close to be extinct/
Death is like an eminent clause, x-cused by nature/
But even if u would expect, I wont hate ya /
I used to see things through, very different eyes/
Now the worlds down sized, all I wanna do is rap/
Bringin mo dayz filled wit light to this planet/
Stayin tight, hope I enlight, some cats firmament,/
And its, evident how things goin down/
� the truths hailed in a cloud/-
that�s why, I smokin herb,- get myself back on track/
peeplz getting shot, cuz they ass is wack/
but I, call that, wack,the new regiment /
armed straight, for the right head` /
but tell me whats wrong and whats right, who dare, to fight,- whats false,-/
-what make your day bright/

it�s the great endevour never seen like/
niggaz always miss the sceme, I talk a sleep and speak a truth u cats are forced to listen too, so/
kiss your lies goodbye and live a life/
that u wouldn�t like to give away when its time to fight/

it starts to rain, and the soil fills wit pain;-/
drain what the rearranged lifestyle, of mankind bring
kill a living, rather die then live freely/
the satanic justice of governments greed;-see/
follow me to death, follow me to fall, follow me till home/
follow me to kill, feel free, shot at will/
I brake em up, brake em on the spot fake it if u want,/
statin this ain�t fun, brakin if u wanna jump/
The new, millennium, I gonna play my position/
Face the ambitions, of a true soldier, chose to go further/
One step closer to the edge standin at the fence to let loose/
My brain has lost screws, so u cant tighten /
I bite of any nigga ear who try bytin/
Cyclone vision and hurricane mission/
If u got what u wishin then u want mo/
Yo, this is raw, like a cut from a chainsaw/

The world lost its meaning long before I was born/
What the fuck is goin on�/
Bloody scars fill the ground drown in pain/
Seeing the world go insane/
Up in the great endevour never seen like/
niggaz always miss the sceme, I talk a sleep and speak a truth u cats are forced to listen too, so/
kiss your lies goodbye and live a life/
that u wouldn�t like to give away when its time to fight/

Yo ist over/i never told ya/
My niggaz soldiers/and never fraid to bust/,
fucked up if try place frontin/
standin in my aim like u want so�in/
u style lame, but I won�t even, hate, on you/
I only shoot mutherfuckers, play the game too coo/
If u wanna get dissed, then be dissed by this/
And if not, then we�ll just live in peace/
What; who wanna jam, wanna bring `em in, people take a stand/
Niggaz wanna fight, then u gotta be man/
My rhymez unload like, and spit �n split seconds/
In a verbal-ized attackin, never jam, on a record/
My mind restless, I un-yield the truth, ruthless/
Build conscious-ness in peoples nescience/
Throughout the dur-ess, u cats cant mess wit chief/
Blast the last words fast, like a gyral sweep/
Yo all i keep is the signs from of the cipher/
to hit right like a sniper, word is bond/

While I speak, pump like pyrotech-nique/
Feast on cheap imitations while I breed/
seeds of all nations/
The world keeps racin/
And most of these thoughts run adjacent, to facts/

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Replies:

yeah not bad subject matter was kinda chopy but flowed kinda cooo (NT) -- treyz1, 10:45:51 03/12/03 Wed
nice man I enjoyed this (NT) -- the dark spitter, 13:26:58 03/12/03 Wed
good i like it, it was raw, not as unreal as alot of posts -- INS, 13:37:25 03/12/03 Wed
This was aiight...work on rhyming words..content and your word usage...some words just didn't fit (NT) -- Lyrikil, 14:56:03 03/12/03 Wed
- I ain�t tryn to holla at u, and i can understand yo point, but wait for the audio post of this, and THEN tell me what didn�t rhyme. No hate, No front, as i said don�t take this wrong. I�m not trying to degrade your critique.... (NT) -- chromenine@gmx.net, 03:56:19 03/13/03 Thu

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