freewritten I wrote a while back... peep this and criticize -- The Lounge Of Lyricism 2003

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Date Posted: 13:18:34 02/12/03 Wed
Author: the dark spitter aka vocab supreme
Author Host/IP: kala2.k12.hi.us / 165.248.247.132
Subject: freewritten I wrote a while back... peep this and criticize

lyrical-e punctures thoughts upon bare leaves of papayrus/
leaving mic rockers "ROLLED" over and "TIRED" like midus/
with vison intercepting glances/
my third eye optical penetrates your eyeruses/
I batter emcees with ill skills like the strength of 200 teakwon do sidekicks/
thinking of which way I can my thoughts through ya "GENES"
like the size "BUDDY LEE FITS IN"/
shifted elevation with acute posistion/
followed by disfuctional misconsecptions/
the dark spitters vocab will blow pass cranium tissue and teach vital lessons/
deadly words with deadly grasps of superhuman tension/
making life count down and minimize breathing with gasps in time and present/
physical style embedded in lyrical setences in freestyles/
your brain cells will be knocked out and forever will not be found/
I travel at speeds that'll break limbs and astonishly diminish the speed of sound/
the dark spitter elevates constant with rymes that rock mics and destroy spine lines/
I pound with compacted fists that shifts your bodilly fluids posistion/

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Replies:

The flow towards the end was nice in parts with one or two nice lines, but I couldn't understand your 'wordplay'...like why would Midus be tired?...maybe you mean Midas the dude who turned all he touched to solid gold?...I dunno I'm puzzled. Nice flow tho' Peace (NT) -- ΜικΜαQ:TheΣxpressionist of Κa†a¢lÿzm, 13:57:25 02/12/03 Wed
Flow swayed a bit....but it was ok for a key (NT) -- Eternal Student (UK), 14:25:53 02/12/03 Wed
i understood the midas line...i think he meant the mineke shit...they fuk wit tune ups, oil, and rotatin tires....i hope thats what u meant....but uh...u tryin too hard to be bright....u already coo....work at simplistic punchlines, that arent corny but concise (NT) -- styliztik...aka...quote, 14:53:38 02/12/03 Wed
Yeah, this was a keystyle to me because it had no "centered-ideal" to it....But it was nice in fact, keep this up and stay up.... (NT) -- h � k �/|_ A \/�...., 15:46:37 02/12/03 Wed

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