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Date Posted: 06:36:24 07/21/20 Tue
Author: River Acheron
Subject: I guess I'm 80-20...
In reply to:
's message, "Imagine Question For 7/16" on 19:01:29 07/16/20 Thu
80% leaning towards guys, and 20% women. Ironically, my longest relationship was with a female, who I dated a few years back from when I was 20 to around 22.
Also, I had a pretty late start with guys, and did not have my first sexual experience with one until I was 17. By late start, I mean I was sexually active with girls since I was 13-ish. I had crushes on fellow boys when I was in middle school and high school of course, but I never had a balls to do anything about it. There was no Grindr back then, and the only "out" boys that I knew, I wasn't attracted to. (In fact, the only outlet I really had was...well...The Shack. For real. lol. Although I was mostly a lurker) In retrospect, I should have came out in school but hindsight being 20/20 and all that. Anyway, when I was 17 I began attending a "Rainbow Youth" support group up in North Jersey and met a 16yo named Kris, and we had sex and dated for maybe like 3 months. I still have his picture he gave me in my wallet, and I cannot bring myself to throw it out. First gay experience and all that. :)
Through my early 20's (and now), I'll still hook up with girls I meet at clubs, but I would never date any of them if that makes sense, and with girls I only like gothic chicks lol. Usually ONLY in their late 20's or early 30's (Yes, they exist, especially here in NJ. We have quite a few goth-industrial clubs.) With guys, there's actually love involved, I FEEL something for them that goes beyond the physical. My main type used to be exclusively gothic or punk guys with the perfect age being 19. Now, however, as I slog through my mid and soon upper 20's, I notice myself not being as picky, I guess is the right word? I don't care as much about style and have been with dudes who are prep, geeks, and everything in between, and while I still PREFER the twinkish age of 19, I've matured a bit where I've had crushes on guys all the way to their mid 30's. I guess as I age, I'm starting to see older guys as attractive. Even body type is not an issue for me anymore. I've pretty much lost the teen shallowness I had when I first started messing around with guys. Women however, have to be an exact certain type for me to get hot for them, probably due to the fact that with women, it's purely physical for me.
Have those two worlds ever collided for me? Not really. (YET!...but it may soon. I'll explain in a min lol) Anyway, I'll jack it to straight porn sometimes on Pornhub when the mood hits me. For IRL stuff, I've had one threesome when I was 21. It was that girl I dated for two years and her ex boyfriend Matt!! You'd think it would be awkward, but it really wasn't. (Maybe for her, I dunno). I guess a case of beer between the three of us helped!
As far as open relationships go...it's very situational. I've never been in one (that threesome was a drunken fluke, but still fun!), but would I be? I don't know if I could answer that until I'm actually faced with that situation. It may come soon. Story time: So right now, I am in...something...with this 20 year old dude named Tristian. Pure twink, pink hair. Utterly gorgeous. We've been hooking up, cuddling, and making out for about a month now. I found out last week that he actually has a long-term girlfriend!! He spent like an hour crying in my arms when he told me. (Grindr can be toxic, ladies and gents lol), anyway...I'm not proud of myself, but I still see him. The way I feel is, it's his decision to make. He talked a few times over the weekend about admitting me to his girlfriend, and trying for an open relationship, or even a threeway relationship if she and I hit it off. It's a very weird situation, and I don't know what to do, especially since I'm developing strong feelings for him. God, I know this sounds like a romance novel or something you'd read on Nifty, but this is seriously my weird life. lol. So...bisexuality is beginning to affect me, but not MY bisexuality.
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