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Mon July 14, 2025 21:00:10 [ Login ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, [8], 9, 10 ]

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Date Posted: 11:12:52 02/05/03 Wed
Author: does it matter.
Author Host/IP: cache-dm07.proxy.aol.com / 205.188.209.75
Subject: HOW I GOT MY NAME........this has alot of thought put in it so i would appreciate everyones opinion..one

AYO! I wanna tell the story of how i recieved my name. Please fallow me back in time, about 8 years of pain. If you pay attention you may see exactly when it was changed.

I take you back to when i was just a child. My heart already dying from the coldness of the worlds trials. Even though I was to young to realize. I had problems and i did'nt hide behind the silence of a troubled childs disquise. But everytime i tried to reach for help from my parents. whether it be, being a bully at school to staying home all day with the objective, of doing nothing but complain. I would just let my emotions go and not try to maintane. "n" still to this day i can remember exactly what my parents would say.
NOTHING!
Because it doesn't even matter.

NOW! without roll models in my life I was destine for doom. I can still remember entering the classrooms. With the same expression on my face. It was repeditive from day to day. I entered the halls of education with a little more hate. The type of hate that builds up in time. I mean the type of hate that builds up in size, deep inside. Before to long thats all you got. So you cant reside. Just resight yor feelings through curse words and fights. So the teachers just wrote me off. The teachers didn't teach me, just looked at me as a loss. The sad fact of the matter is that they didn't even put forth the effort or try. No teacher student confrences or or counclers. Just failing grades and lie's. And for years I would sit and try. To figure out why they gave up so quick. It was probaly my fault for being such a prick. But now that iam out it was but one lesson that would stick. In their eye's my desease was'nt curable. So school does'nt even matter for those who's pain made them refrain and caused their mind frame to not be as durable.

THEN! came the fake ass friends. THe type that left me in my own blood to die. When it was i who tried to protect them, and as i layed almost unconscience and watched them leave me like excess bagage. i realize i didnt matter to them or this population of savages. But as soon as i got better after two weeks in the hospital with no visitors or letters. I decided that i should pull the knives out of my back and stab them in both of their faces. I HATE THIS! this game that we play, and even today. THe more i speek the more it does'nt matter what i say.

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