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| Saturday, May 16, 01:21:13pm | [ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, [2], 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 ] |
| Subject: Two ways of looking | |
Author: Des taff Jenkins (Happy) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Tuesday, May 27, 08:39:15am Hi All. A bloke took his wife to a school reunion. A woman sitting at another table was sloshed out of her mind. Do you know her asked the wife. Yes she was my first girlfriend he said, I dumped her, and she's been drunk ever since. Jeez! said the wife that's a long time to celebrate. Cheers Des [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| Subject: maidstone | |
Author: peter j murphy happy (happy) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Tuesday, May 20, 04:22:08pm mike of maidstone [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: FLORIDA MEET UP ?? | |
Author: Glan Phillips R397279 [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Sunday, May 18, 02:26:05am Just wondering whether anyone would be interested in a meet up, I know that there are at least two other ex M.N. within range, Ron Stewart & Neville Roberts, any more around central Florida ? [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: One for the Aussies | |
Author: Syd Young (G'Day) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Friday, May 23, 10:43:55am > Life in the Australian Army... > > Text of a letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad. > (For Those of you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town, west of > Quilpie in the far south west of Queensland ) > > > > > Dear Mum & Dad, > > I am well. Hope youse are too. Tell me big brothers Doug > and Phil that the Army is better than workin' on the farm - tell them to > get in bloody quick smart before the jobs are all gone! I wuz a bit slow > in settling down at first, because ya don't hafta get outta bed until > 6am. But I like sleeping in now, cuz all ya gotta do before brekky is > make ya bed and shine ya boots and clean ya uniform. No bloody cows to > milk, no calves to feed, no feed to stack - nothin'!! Ya haz gotta > shower though, but its not so bad, coz there's lotsa hot water and even > a light to see what ya doing! > > At brekky ya get cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no > kangaroo steaks or possum stew like wot Mum makes. You don't get fed > again until noon and by that time all the city boys are buggered because > we've been on a 'route march' - geez its only just like walking to the > windmill in the back paddock!! > > This one will kill me brothers Doug and Phil with > laughter. I keep getting medals for shootin' - dunno why. The bullseye > is as big as a bloody possum's bum and it don't move and it's not firing > back at ya like the Johnsons did when our big scrubber bull got into > their prize cows before the Ekka last year! All ya gotta do is make > yourself comfortable and hit the target - it's a piece of piss!! You > don't even load your own cartridges, they comes in little boxes, and ya > don't have to steady yourself against the rollbar of the roo shooting > truck when you reload! > > Sometimes ya gotta wrestle with the city boys and I gotta > be real careful coz they break easy - it's not like fighting with Doug > and Phil and Jack and Boori and Steve and Muzza all at once like we do > at home after the muster. > Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either and it looks like > I'm the best the platoon's got, and I've only been beaten by this one > bloke from the Engineers - he's 6 foot 5 and 15 stone and three pick > handles across the shoulders and as ya know I'm only 5 foot 7 and eight > stone wringin' wet, but I fought him till the other blokes carrie d me > off to the boozer. > > I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in > quick before word gets around how bloody good it is. > > Your loving daughter, > > Sheila [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: Rubber Duckies | |
Author: Des Taff Jenkins (Can't remember) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Wednesday, May 14, 09:15:28am Hi All. I have just finished reading about a container of rubber ducks that was washed overboard in 1992, apparently they washed up on beaches all over the world: and one bloke used their positions to map sea currents. He has since tracked some of the cargo that manages to to escape from the 100 million or so containers that are shipped each year, of which 10,000 fall overboard. In 2000 a million Lego blocks were lost from three containers in the Atlantic, and he expects some of them to arrive via the artic circle on Alaskan beaches in 2012. Question--has anyone found anything of interest on a beach, like a message in a bottle Cheers Des [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: zenit 2 manchester riot police thousands. | |
Author: {terry scouse} (birdbrain idea) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Wednesday, May 14, 11:50:38pm who:s birdbrain idea was it to hold the cup final in manchester tonight rangers -zenit st petersburg.bars open at 8 am this morning.supermarkets selling cheap booze from 8 am.just heared on the news thousands of arrests one russian guy stabbed.what a shambles. we all knew that the rangers supporters wern:t going to take defeat lightly.and dont forget man utd have to travel to moscow to play chelsea. champions league final shortly.if my kids where man utd supporters i would have to put my foot down and insist that they will not be going .lets just hope the russian guy doesnt die.police over there shoot first ask questions later.watching the news this morning about 9 am the jocks where throwing the beers and spirits down them then.some plonker from manchester said they were all in the party mood and would continue into the night {talk about behind the painted smile}he was a very worried man indeed .and true to form the rangers supporters never let him down regards all {terry scouse } enjoyed a few beers in the capital of cuture this evening very enjoyable to. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: History repeated | |
Author: Des Taff Jenkins (Happy) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Tuesday, May 20, 08:20:06am Hi All. Do you know what happened in 1850, 158 years ago? California became a state, No electricity; no money; most of the people spoke Spanish; there were gun fights on the street. So basicaly nothing has changed except that women in those days had real breasts ; and men didn't hold hands. Cheers Des [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: Off topic postings | |
Author: Brian (Site admin) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Tuesday, May 20, 06:41:03am It seems that I need to remind a few people that there is a convention with Message Boards that you do not reply with off topic postings. There is a heck of a lot of that on my Message Boards which must stop. If you want to start your own personal little war do so with an original posting - stop using other peoples. i have managed to stop the bad language, off topic postings are next. I will be checking every posting from now on and will remove, without notice, any that breach this basic rule. As with bad language, if this is not to your liking the choice is yours. Brian. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| Subject: A good un | |
Author: Roger Wolfe in Tassie R713695 (Had to laugh at this) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Tuesday, May 20, 03:13:18am An old cowboy sat down at the bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his drink, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life, breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy." She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women.. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women." The two sat sipping in silence. A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian." [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| Subject: A laugh keeps the world turning | |
Author: Des Taff Jenkins (Happy) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Thursday, May 15, 08:27:29am Hi All. A woman asked her husband. "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?" He looked at her from head to toe and said. " I like your sense of humour". Cheers Des [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: Fog lockers | |
Author: albert bishop (Still happy) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Sunday, May 11, 10:42:23am Easy one. We all seem to have a fog locker, and all the antipodeans seem to keep theirs hidden away in some sort of bushes, But can anyone tell me where the real fog locker was on a ship? Cheers, and no I'm not giving a weather report, just in case (But its warm ad sunny) Albi. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: Lets 'ave a larf | |
Author: Syd Young [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Thursday, May 15, 06:26:47pm LOYAL WIFE There was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real misery when it came to his money. Just before he died, he said to his wife, 'When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.' And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him. Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her. When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, 'Wait just a minute!' She had a box with her, she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away. Her friend said, 'I know you weren't fool enough to put all that money in there with your husband.' The loyal wife replied 'Listen, I'm a Christian, I can't go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money in that casket with him.' 'You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!!!!?' 'I sure did' said the wife. 'I got it all together, put it into my account and wrote him a cheque. If he can cash it, he can spend it [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: Where do you now live | |
Author: Graham R774640 (Interested) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Tuesday, May 06, 05:17:53pm Just out of interest, we all use this site, but where do you all live? ie myself, Graham, SE London.( for all my faults ) [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: photo site | |
Author: neville roberts [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Saturday, May 17, 01:29:30pm Hi Brian, I posted some pics on the new site and made a mistake, put a pic of some furniture I made , and cant seem to remove it and put myself in its place. all the best .Nev. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| Subject: If the cap fits! | |
Author: Tom Harrison [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Friday, May 16, 11:24:34pm An old retired mechant seaman decides to try and live some memories of years gone by. Gets donned in his best gear and heads down the docks to the red light district. Finds his self a nice street girl agrees a price and goes up to her room. going at it as best he can for a man of his age, the old sailor asks, "how am I doing babe". The girl replies "Well sailor your doing about three knots". "Whats that supposed to mean" says he? Your knot hard your knot in your knot getting your bloody money back regards. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
| Subject: seamen | |
Author: john (who was he) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Sunday, May 04, 02:44:18pm PETER MURPHY [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: Nautical Miles | |
Author: Dennis McGuckin [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Sunday, May 11, 06:27:12pm Had an idle thought the other day.[the sort I most often have] Wondered how many nautical miles I had sailed. With Goggle Earth and other marvels of the internet,any 'geeks' out there know how I could do it. Would be a great way to pass the time, and get out of my domestic duties. Den. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: DOCKERS?. | |
Author: alf corbyn (plymouth devon r 397928) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Wednesday, May 07, 01:01:00pm what part did the dockers play in the demise of the merchant navy?. cheers. alf [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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| Subject: For John | |
Author: Brian (Site admin) [ Edit | View ] |
Date Posted: Sunday, May 11, 11:05:08am No John, I do not like that word and I will continue to do my best to see that such language is not used on MY website and that it is not dragged down to the gutter where such terms belong. If that doesn't suit you then take the advice offered by those who supported me - my thanks to them. Brian. [ Post a Reply to This Message ] |
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