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• Inside -- Kyrian, 02:51:15 02/23/06 Thu
  • inside -- Haylie, 02:58:48 02/23/06 Thu
    • Inside -- Kyrian, 03:05:01 02/23/06 Thu
      • Her brow furrowed a little as she watched him turn and walk away from her and it felt like her heart was breaking all the more all over again. So this is what it would have felt like if he had actually shown up at the church and walked away from her instead of just not making an appearance at all. It would have been her standing there, watching his back as he walked away from her. Shaking her head, she growled at her own self pity before she turned her eyes away from him, speaking just loud enough so he might be able to hear her. "Yeah, we'll share information. As long you bother showing up for that at least." She stated, turning on her heels to finish looking around the barn, attempting to get her mind back on work and away from the man who was making a habit of walking away and leaving her behind. (NT) -- Haylie, 03:15:17 02/23/06 Thu
    • (He stopped in his tracks at her words and stood there for a long moment letting them set into his mind. He had known she would be angry about his absense at the church and he wondered suddenly how much she knew about what had happened that night. Turning, he looked over at her, watched her try to distract herself in the same way he had been trying to do when she showed up.) I tried to get there, Haylie. (He said in a voice that was surprisingly more calm than he felt, his eyes were dark with pain.) I tried so hard to get to you. (Had his phone not been taken from his pocket he would have gotten the call from the commander and he would have been a bit late to the church but they would have been married nonetheless.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 03:19:21 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• "You tried to get there?" She shook her head, her brow furrowed as she kept her gaze away from him. Her voice was obviously thick with tears as she wrapped her fingers around the stall door in front of her, looking down at the empty stall that housed only hay at the moment. "I stayed there for four hours, Kyrian. Four hours after you were supposed to be there for the ceremony. I stayed there for like..six hours after you didn't show up for the photo's..." She shook her head, swallowing heavily as she tipped her head to gaze at the ceiling, letting out a slow breath as she fought the tears that were clogging her throat, she had thought she was all cried out but apperantly she was wrong. There was no reason why he couldn't have called, couldn't have made it there within the four or five hours that she sat waiting for him...it was humiliating, hurtful and just...harsh what he had done to her. (NT) -- Haylie, 03:25:14 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• (He felt like he was back at home again.. the fourteen year old boy watching his grown father crying and begging his mother to stop leaving him.. he had sworn he would never be so dependent on a woman and yet here he stood feeling as though he might cry and beg her to stay as well.) I was scared.. Haylie you have no idea what I went through.. it's no excuse for hurting you the way I did but damnit.. if you had only stayed there I would have told you everything. (He ran a hand back through his shaggy hair, trying to stay where he was and not go to her while she was hurting, but he couldn't do it and walked over to put his hands on her arms from behind her, his chest against her back. The smell of her overwhelmed him and he sighed.) You looked so beautiful in those photos.. (NT) -- Kyrian, 03:31:55 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• She let out a deep breath and stiffened when he came up behind her even though she so desperately wanted to sink back into his arms and let him hold her. "Yeah, well, I was scared too Kyrian but I showed up..." She murmurmed softly, she really was so hurt over it all. It was everything she had feared would happen if she fell for a guy and it had all happened at once. She couldn't handle that. "You like the dress? I don't think its returnable, maybe Shay has a friend or something that could use it cuz it really was a beautiful dress..." She trailed off lightly, biting her lip and shrugging her shoulder for a brief moment before she swallowed heavily. (NT) -- Hayle, 11:20:18 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• (He sighed at her words, knowing she was right and yet somehow feeling that deepseated need to attempt to save face. He felt at that moment that any attempt to argue for his own side would just make things worse, so he kept quiet about things, just running his hands up and down her arms to offer her support and strength. When she mentioned the dress, he smiled just a little.) No one could make that dress look as beautiful as you did.. (He gave into the need and lowered his head to nuzzle the side of her head, his eyes closing as he combated himself.) I think you should keep it.. I want to see you wear it again for me someday. (He smoothed his hands over her arms, sighing at the sweet smell of her - so familiar to him and so desperately needed to calm the lonliness inside him.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 21:57:26 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• She let out a soft breath and shook her head, closing her eyes as she just relished in his touch for a moment, taking just a second to have her ragged heart soothed by his nearness. When he spoke about her wearing the dress again though, she stiffened and stilled for a second before she moved away from him, slipping away from touch so she wouldn't be tempted to cave. Her sunglasses still hid her eyes but they were starting to agitate her so she took them for a second, revealing the dark circles beneath them and the redness surrounding her dark gaze. It was obvious she had spent most of the time away from him in tears but she didn't want to broadcast that fact so she slipped the glasses back on after a second of rubbing her eyes. "I am not getting married, Kyrian. Not to you and not to anyone else either." She stated seriously, honestly and firmly. (NT) -- Haylie, 22:28:34 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• (The way his eyes wandered over her and darkened when she looked at him through those pained eyes had nothing to do with lust and everything to do with desire to comfort and be with her again. He knew that she had cried over him, Shay had told him so - and had he not known before that moment, he would have been even more devistated by the look in her eyes than he had been. Nevertheless, he lifted a hand to run it back through his hair and smiled just a little.) Those are pretty strong words, Haylie.. and even though I know you are a woman of integrity.. I just don't see you keeping that promise. (He intended on being married to her someday, and for now he would allow her to think she was keeping the upper hand.. but not for long.) Are you staying for dinner? (He shifted a hand into his pocket and tipped his head to the side a little bit, thoughtfully looking her over, noting that she had lost a bit of weight since he had last seen her.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 22:35:18 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• She bit her lip, her brow furrowed a little before she just chose to ignore his first statement and answer his second. "No. I have am staying in a nearby town, just here to ask some questions." She stated with a calmness that was beguiling the panic and heart ache that she had inside of her. Running a hand through her hair, her eyes narrowed a little. "That woman who told me your were out just seemed ready to sing your praises." She stated, curious as to what Kyrian had done to make the woman think so much of him in so short of time. Her eyes suddenly drifted to the house, her brow furrowed a little. "How's Remy holding up?" She questioned, she had been worried about him and definately worried for Shay and feeling bad for her to say the least, she was missing Remy harsh. (NT) -- Haylie, 23:12:09 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• (He held back on the urge to comfort her - he felt bad for the fact that he had put her off balance with his matter of fact statement.. but at the same time he was glad that his words had affected her.. it gave him hope.) Addie? She's a really nice girl.. a bit addicted to marshmellows, but real sweet. (He shrugged a bit, slipping his other hand into his pocket.) Ah, you know Remy.. he's just holding in there and going about his business, though I can tell that he is still feeling pretty out of it physically and he misses Shay like crazy. (His eyes were slightly shielded as some clouds passed overhead, and he sighed a bit as he shifted his weight to his other foot, feeling off balance himself. He hadn't thought to see her so soon and wasn't sure he knew what to do to remedy the situation.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 23:22:10 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• She nodded a little at that, her brow furrowed a little. "Shay misses him too..." She stated softly, thinking about how much she herself had missed Kyrian and now that he was here it was taking everything within her to stick to the resolve she had made to not let herself be that dependent on a man again where it would hurt her so desperately if he left. Her hand lifted to run over the top of her hair absently before she spoke. "Well, I just wanted to let you know myself that I was here instead of you hearing it from someone else." She offered a tight lip smile, her eyes hidden and her voice carefully clipped. "I should be getting back to work." Work was the only thing that could distract her from him for any amount of time. (NT) -- Haylie, 23:41:13 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• (He nodded, thinking about how Remy had looked at Addie.. knowing that his partner had seen her resemblance to Shay as a blatant reminder of just how much he missed his wife. Sighing, he rubbed at an itch on his side, pressing his hand to the back of his neck instead of putting it back into his pocket when he was done, the movement shifting the powerful muscles under his shirt and giving him an air of nervous thoughtfulness. As she spoke of getting back to work, he shook his head a little.) Yeah, you go ahead and do that.. wouldn't want you to have to spend time around me or anything.. might just be too hard for you to deal with. (The pain that showed in his eyes as he thought about how she had run off to work instead of talking to him like she should have made him feel sick to his stomach.. she was so close and yet he could feel the gulf between them.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 23:49:57 02/23/06 Thu

  ---

• Her mouth nearly dropped open in shock as she turned back to look at him, her voice losing its controlled clip and suddenly just sounding pissed. "Don't even get an attitude with Kyrian, thats bullshit and you know it. You left me at the alter. You asked me to marry you and when you decided you didn't want to go through with it you to much of a fucking coward to show up and tell me." She shook her head, if he could see her dark eyes they would be sparking brightly, a fire made of pain and hurt that was highly combustiable just waiting to explode evident in the dark depths. "I think I am dealing remarkably well by not telling you exactly where you can shove your fucking attitude, alright?" She was near trembling now, anger making her breath come out in short huffs, anger was so much easier to deal with then hurt. (NT) -- Haylie, 00:05:57 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• (He couldn't blame her for being angry, but that didn't mean he had to stand there and take it from her like this either. His hands came out of his pockets and his left one closed opened as he heard her out, his jaw setting more and more as she raged at him.) I wanted to go through it, Haylie.. hell, I still do... I didn't show because the whole situation got fucked up over a piece of damned paper.. (He stopped, putting his hands up.. he didn't want to stand there and hash out what had happened that day, it still grated on him how things had turned out and he didn't feel like defending himself now.) You know what? Forget it.. if you didn't have the faith in me to find out what happened before you bailed out on us, then it doesn't matter now. (He shook his head as he turned to walk back towards the keep.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 00:23:44 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• inside -- Haylie, 00:31:12 02/24/06 Fri
  • Inside -- Kyrian, 00:54:11 02/24/06 Fri
    • inside -- Haylie, 00:59:58 02/24/06 Fri
      • Inside -- Kyrian, 01:15:50 02/24/06 Fri
        • She sighed deeply, shaking her head as she watched him go upstairs, apperantly that first meeting didn't go as well as she had hoped it would though really, realistically, she had known it wouldn't. She smiled at Dag before she excused herself to go upstairs, making sure that he didn't drown himself in port. Without knocking, she just stepped in, heading over to sit in the chair across from him. "It's going to take time, you know. Neither one of you are going to just get over the pain and hurt the first time you see one another..." She let out a soft breath before she picked up the bag of marshmellows she had brought up with her and pulled one out, handing it to him with a sparkling gaze that spoke of sympathy and genuine care for this stranger that she hardly knew. There was just something about him that tugged at her heart and she wanted things to work out so badly for him... (NT) -- Addie, 01:21:44 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• (He had been leaning back in the chair, his head tilted back against the cold stone of the castle wall and his eyes closed against the severe pain he was feeling. He felt like it was all his fault.. the mere idea that she blamed him made it true. When Addie entered the room he didn't move, not until she was sitting across from him, then he shifted a little bit to look over at her through sorrow filled green eyes.) I can handle the pain and hurt, Addie. I can't handle knowing that I shattered her illusions about love and trust.. (He shook his head, watching her with a surprised sort of appreciation.) Thanks. (He murmured, knowing how she guared the bag with her life. He looked at the marshmellow for a moment before smiling a bit in a rueful manner, popping the treat into his mouth and leaning his head back against the wall again as he contemplated things. It was all just wearing on him and he was feeling like just going to bed forever at the moment.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 01:46:00 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• inside -- Addie, 02:00:14 02/24/06 Fri
  • (He looked at her through half hooded eyes for a few moments, trying to sheild what little bit of himself he had left.. but it seemed that Addie had his number too well for that, so he gave up and watched her enjoy her marshmellows.) I don't even know what I did to make her love me.. it just happened. (He said as he leaned forward in the chair, resting his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands.) I told her I still wanted to marry her and that I love her.. and she just said that she wasn't going to make that mistake again.. (He shook his head, his words muffled by his hands. The way he was feeling at the moment, any more rejection would shatter him completely.. he had very little left to give and his self-esteem was shot. He nodded as she commented on Haylie's beauty.) She's the only woman I have ever spent more than a couple hours with... (NT) -- Kyrian, 02:04:56 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• inside -- Addie, 02:10:18 02/24/06 Fri
  • (He groaned, rubbing his face with his hands hopign that if he did so hard enough that maybe he would just become someone else.. this was just surreal.) I don't want to think about last night, ever ever again. I didn't intend on doing anything of that nature.. and I have decided that I am forgoing the use of alcohol for the rest of my life. (He looked up at her, the pain in his eyes outlined by furrowed brows and slightly pursed lips.) I am serious about getting her back.. but I don't know if I can keep submitting myself to that sort of torture.. God, she looked so deeply hurt and I've seen her make it through serious injury with fewer tears. (NT) -- Kyrian, 02:18:48 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• inside -- Addie, 02:33:53 02/24/06 Fri
  • (He sighed deeply and shot a look at Addie that said that he knew it wasn't the best idea of his life, and hadn;t needed her to point it out.. though he had a feeling she really was looking out for him here.. and the care she was showing for him softened him up a bit. Nodding, he looked up at her, taking the marshmellows from her with a soft smile and getting to his feet.) I don't know if I know how to take the hurt out of her eyes. (He stated honestly, watching her with interest and smirking a little as she toussled his hair, shaking his head a bit as he walked over to the large four poster.) Don't bother with dinner.. I'm not feeling up to socializing right now. (He said evenly, sitting on the edge of the bed and leaning over to take off his shoes. He would curl up on the bed and lay there thinking about Haylie and their fight.. things had gone desperately awry and he didn't know if he was could put them back in place again.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 02:43:45 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• inside -- Addie/Haylie, 14:51:42 02/24/06 Fri
  • Inside -- Kyrian, 15:29:45 02/24/06 Fri
    • "I see....good thing that your on assignment in Scotland then, huh?" She questioned before she came over, sighing softly. "You have to eat something, Kyr..." She murmured, using his nickname instead of his full name as she had every time she had said it out in the barn. She set the plate on the table next to the bed and gazed down at him quietly, biting her lip a touch as her brow furrowed gently. "The food is good...helped a little bit with the jetlag...it sucks." She wasn't sure exactly why she was making nice with him, maybe it was just that her heart hurt so bad and the idea that he could be in pain like she was...her love for him made her hate to see him hurting... (NT) -- Haylie, 16:17:24 02/24/06 Fri
      • (He didn't think he could think about his own health and well-being when he was so caught up worrying about her and their lacking relationship. He hated that they had been so close, that the two of them had been so happy together.... and that all of a sudden things had become so desperately ruined.) Yeah well I guess it's a good thing that Remy is able to work then, isn't it. (He muttered back, shifting a bit to sit up, bringing his knees up to his chest and laying his wrists on them so that his hands dangled down, his eyes on the wall between his knees.) Fuck the jetlag, Haylie.. I can't stand being so close to you and not having what we had. (NT) -- Kyrian, 16:36:34 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• She sighed softly, sinking down on the edge of the bed, her brow furrowed. "You really should eat something..." She murmured softly, her eyes sliding closed as she once more tried to keep herself from crying. God, she wanted so badly to be in his arms and it just seemed to never really stop, the need to be with him. She had tried to run away from him, from the feelings he invoked, she had tried to get angry with him but as soon as she saw him hurting all she wanted to do was help him feel better even though her own heart was breaking. "Don't want you to get sick or anything..." (NT) -- Haylie, 17:09:23 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• (Had it been Addie or one of the others to bring him food and insist that he eat, he would have just let the plate sit there all night.. might have picked at it a little throughout the evening but would have never have eaten enough to fill his stomach. But it was Haylie that had asked, and he would do just about anything she told him to do to appease her at that moment, so he looked over at the plate and sighed a little bit.) I will. (He said after a moment, though his eyes returned to her and after a second of hesitation, he reached out to run the backs of his fingers over her cheek when her eyes closed, his own gaze softening from the sudden need he was feeling to be close to her. He just wanted to forget the pain for a moment and pretend that she still loved him.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 17:21:38 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• At the feel of the back of his touch on her cheeks, the tears broke over her lashes and spilled over his fingers, her eyes squeezing shut tighter as she tried fruitlessly to stop them. A ragged breath was taken in before she turned to look at him for a moment, the pain and hurt evident in her eyes but also the longing, love and need for him. Maybe she didn't want to get married anymore, maybe she wasn't made to be in a serious committed relationship without chasing the guy off but that didn't mean that she hadn't meant it everytime she had said she loved him. "I didn't leave because I didn't love you..." She choked out, the words barely audiable due to the tears and her whispering them. (NT) -- Haylie, 17:40:32 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• (His eyes had softened considerably since she had started crying and the feel of her skin beneath his fingers made him want to touch move of her, to remember how it had been to feel her shifting and moaning for him instead of this softly pained whisper.) Ssh.. (He said and let his fingers trail back through her hair, his eyes wandering her face.) I know.. you just have no faith in me. (He said the words under his breath, as though trying to remind himself that he was upset with her, though it was apparent that he was having a really hard time not just pulling her into his arms.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 17:52:55 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• "It hurt..." She managed to get out between the tears, feeling foolish now for breaking down in front of him when he was still mad at her for leaving as she had. She'd just needed some time to figure out everything but he had just taken it as her never coming back though she hadn't even known if he would want her after not showing up to marry her. The feel of his hands in her hair though was so comforting that she couldn't help but move closer to him, seeking his reassurance and familiarity, she really did love him so much, she had never felt anything for anyone else even close to what she has felt for him. (NT) -- Haylie, 17:57:53 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• (He searched her gaze as she shifted closer to him, wanting to reach out to her and pull her close, to let her cry out her pain so that he could go about helping her heal. He could see now that she was harboring it all on her shoulders and that even if he tried to take it from her she would guard that pain like a child.. he knew she had to let it out before she would let him anywhere closer to her. ) I never meant to hurt you, Haylie. I love you. (He said softly, his hand moving to run back over her cheek and back into her hair again.) Remy and Shay had to stop me from coming after you.. I was so angry with myself for everything that happened that day. (He shook his head.. it was just hard to say it to her, when it still made him so angry inside.) I was so afraid that something would happen to you in the field and I wouldn't have the chance to tell you that I still love you. (NT) -- Kyrian, 18:14:49 02/24/06 Fri

  ---

• inside -- Haylie, 22:54:48 02/24/06 Fri
  • Inside -- Kyrian, 23:31:10 02/24/06 Fri
    • inside -- Haylie, 23:50:08 02/24/06 Fri
      • (He moved from her after running his hand over her cheek one last time. By the hearth, he knelt to stoke the coals beneath the remaining log before adding a couple more in and poking around until the fire had raised up. After holding his hands over it for a moment, he flipped the grate to let the air in to keep it burning hot and then turned to walk over to her. Seeing her sitting there, her brow furrowed and confusion written all over her, he felt a deep tenderness rise up inside him, making him want to take care of her - to prove that he could be the man she wanted him to be and that she couldn't go through life without loving and trusting him.) Yeah.. I told Addie I wasn't very hungry before.. (He eyed the plate of food and settled back down on the bed, his back against the headboard.) Come up here, just sit with me and we'll talk some more. (NT) -- Kyrian, 00:03:07 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• She watched him for a moment before she let out a soft breath. "Not hungry? Thats different." She offered a slight, half smile, the only one she'd given him since they had gotten here. Her gaze followed him as he moved to the bed, her lip tucked between her teeth for a long moment before shifted - still clad in her leather work suit - and sat against the headboard, her head resting back against the wall so she was sitting up straight instead of laying down with her head cuddled on his chest and her leg entwined in his the way she would any other time in the past when they were laying together. "What should we talk about?" (NT) -- Haylie, 00:38:28 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• Inside -- Kyrian, 00:55:20 02/25/06 Sat
  • She bit her lower lip and shrugged a little, letting out a soft breath as her fingers fidgited to play with a loose strand of thread on the soft, luxerious comforter that covered the bed. "Um...I don't really have a whole lot of case notes yet..." She stated softly. "...really, this is the first day I have actually felt well enough to work...I guess I had some kind of travel bug too." The same one that he had, the lack of sleep or to much sleep, not eating, not training one. "Must be going around or something..." She had never felt so shy and quiet around him, around anyone really. She was always outspoken and stated whatever was on her mind but at the moment she was at a loss. (NT) -- Haylie, 01:07:33 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• (He nodded as he listened to her, feeling just as awkward as she was, but only because he didn't know what to say to cue her in on the fact that he knew she was just trying to hide her feelings to protect herself. He let a few long moments pass after she finished speaking before he looked over at her.) You have no idea how hard it is for me to be near you and not hold you, Haylie. (He said honestly, letting her know just how much he was suffering by knowing that she was hurt and not feeling like he could comfort her without overstepping some invisible boundary that she had put between them. To him, the whole situation seemed stupid.. like if they both could just apologize and get over it and move on.. get married and go back to the way it was.. that life would be fine. He wasn't used to feeling so damned inside out over something, perhaps he was finally feeling what heartbreak felt like and it just confused him a bit.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 01:41:34 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• "Yeah...feels kind of weird, doesn't it?" She questioned absently before she shifted on the bed a little, her brow furrowed. "Listen, you wanna go for a walk or something? I have all this nervous energy that I need to get rid of..." She bit her lip, looking up at him. The way she asked him to come with showed she wasn't trying to get away from him or get rid of him, she wanted his company, wanted to be close to him but she just felt awkward sitting there on his bed and barely talking to each other. At least going for a walk or something or would be physical and they could keep busy so the long silences wouldn't seem quite as awkward. (NT) -- Haylie, 01:48:47 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• (He nodded, it did feel wierd and he was having an awful time sitting still. Part of him was exhausted and just wanted to go to bed and forget everything and part of him had come alive when she had come into the room and now refused to relax.) Yeah, we can do that. (He said softly after a moment, getting to his feet to walk over and shut the grate on the hearth. He had gotten used to fire safety to the point that it was habitual since he had lived with Remy - who noticed everything and never allowed him to forget to close the grate when he left the room.) Where do you want to go? (He asked as he walked over to pick up his shoes, sitting in the armchair to put them on, his shaggy hair covering his eyes as he tipped his head down to tie his shoes.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 01:54:52 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• inside -- Haylie, 02:07:50 02/25/06 Sat
  • Inside -- Kyrian, 02:11:49 02/25/06 Sat
    • She looked at him curiously for a second before she led the way out into the cool night air, huddling a little bit more into her hoodie. It was quiet for most of the way as they walked, following the path that Jailynn had talked to her about for about fifteen minutes before they came to the loch and she stopped, gazing over it quietly. "So beautiful..." She murmured softly before she headed out farther towards the edge of the water. There were on the higher land, looking out over the land and Dalkeith could be seen a little farther down but at the moment she was more focused on the scenery around them. Quietly, she sat down on a smooth rock and then looked up at him, her hair a little mussed thanks to the wind and her cheeks rosy thanks to the cool air. (NT) -- Haylie, 02:25:07 02/25/06 Sat
  • Inside -- Kyrian, 02:31:25 02/25/06 Sat
    • For a moment she just froze, first at his compliment and then secondly at the way he leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers. When he pulled back she moved towards him instinctively it had been way to long since she had felt his lips against hers, since she had tasted him. He had a distinct flavor just a mix of him and the lingering taste of cigarette smoke and cinnamon gum...she loved that taste. A soft sound of quiet distress escaped her when he started to move back and she shifted to press her lips firmly to his, her eyes closing as the kiss softened into something warm, soft and tender. Her hand moved up to slowly, softly cup his jaw, bringing him closer to her as her eyes remained lightly shut, emotions and sensations sweeping over her. (NT) -- Haylie, 03:03:29 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• (He had had this hidden fear inside that when she felt his lips agianst hers that she would respond for a moment and then pull back from him.. but he had prepared himself for that since he was so desperate to taste her again. He could never forget the sweet taste of her and the minty flavor of something that could have been toothpaste or gum, not that he cared. When she mewled against him and shifted forward, he groaned in response, his hand coming up her arm, up the back of her neck and then into her hair, fisting lightly in a way that he tended to do when he was feeling shaken by her. His hand slipped a little, her hair sifting through his fingers before he rested them against the back of her neck, kneading lightly as he tilted his head to deepen the kiss more. It had been so long since he had felt so free and alive.. and he wanted more of it, more of the freedom he felt from kissing her.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 03:10:33 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• He overwhelmed her senses, made her feel like she just wanted to fall into his arms and let him take care of her, hold her, love her and cherish her. He could do whatever he wanted with her actually, as long as he didn't stop kissing her like he was. She shifted impossibly closer to him, her own hands moving up through his hair - god, she had always loved his hair, loved running her fingers through it, playing with it while laid his head in her lap and talked to her. What could have possibly gone so horribly wrong when all of this, the way he touched her, kissed her, the way he groaned softly...it all felt so right? (NT) -- Haylie, 03:36:22 02/25/06 Sat

  ---

• (He could feel the desperation in her, in the way her back was tense and her fingers were roaming through his hair so tenderly and the way she pressed against him as though he might just move away from her if she didn't. He shifted his hands down her body and pulled her into his lap so she was straddling him, pressing his hips against hers so that she was nestled against him in that intimate way that they fit so well in. His breath hitched and came out in a groaned sigh as he kissed her passionately, both hands smoothing over her hips and lower back, trying to sooth one type of tension while creating another.. he wanted her to want him as desperately as he wanted her.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 03:40:33 02/25/06 Sat

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• Her own soft moan came out to vibrate against his lips as he nestled her against him so securely. Her eyes opened for a moment as she pulled back from his lips and ducked her face into his neck, her warm breath moving across his skin as she tried to compose herself. "Lets go back to your room..." She murmured into his ear, catching the lobe between her lips and tugging lightly as her hand moved down his arm and entwined their fingers together, pulling back a little to gaze down at him with her lips all swollen and red from his kisses, her cheeks flushed and her hair attractively mussed... (NT) -- Haylie, 03:52:03 02/25/06 Sat

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• (He groaned as she tugged at his earlobe, his usual response to any touch near the sensitive skin below his ear.) Yeah.. okay.. (He said through the fog in his brain that she had effectively created by simply looking beautiful in a hoodie and jeans.. and by making that desperate and furtive sound when he had kissed her. He ran a hand down her cheek, his thumb running across her lower lip before he shifted to kiss her one more time and then to lift her to her feet. Once he was standing as well, he took her hand in his and started back up the trail towards his room, looking at her every few moments as though not sure she would still be there.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 03:55:50 02/25/06 Sat

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• She squeezed his hand every so often but let go when they got to the keep so that she could head into the kitchen and get a bottle of water before heading back up to his room to meet him there. She had just needed a moment to calm her emotions and remind herself that this was just a physical need, not a physical expression of their love. When she came back up, she opened the door and stepped in before closing it behind her, finally making her way to the bed where he was. She kicked off her shoes, crawling up next to him as she ran her hand over his stomach, her dark eyes on his before she dipped her head to kiss his cheek softly... (NT) -- Haylie, 04:01:32 02/25/06 Sat

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• Inside -- Kyrian, 13:40:40 02/25/06 Sat
  • inside -- Haylie, 01:16:36 02/27/06 Mon
    • (He swallowed, visibly, as he watched her cross the room in that cream color cami.. he had always had a thing for her cami's.. she had a few in different colors and they just seemed to outline and show off her body in a way that made him crazy.. only tonight it seemed like his mind was crazy but his body was saying no way. As she stretched out beside him, he felt this inner ache to reach out and touch her, to bring her closer and kiss her and make love to her.. but at the same time he was fighting this odd physical feeling as though his body were just refusing to get with the program. His eyes closed as her hand slipped through his hair and he lifted one hand to lay on her side just below the swell of her chest.. frustration could not even begin to explain how he was feeling.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 01:24:55 02/27/06 Mon
    • He wasn't reaching out to draw her closer and that made her wonder exactly what was wrong but she thought maybe he was just hesitant due to their splitting up and whatnot so she shifted closer, working one leg to rest between his as she shifted to tug off his shirt, her eyes dark and deep in the flickering glow of the firelight. She stripped him of the offending article of clothing, tossing it aside before she dipped her head to run her tongue along his collar bone, tracing the lines there. If he wasn't really to start things off she would shamelessly toss herself at him, why not? She wanted him, hell, she needed him and she intended to have him. (NT) -- Haylie, 01:52:12 02/27/06 Mon
    • (He sighed as she shifted closer, bringing his other hand up to frame her upper body, watching her with interest. He had no idea what was going on with his body, why he wasn't feeling as strung out to get inside her as he usually was.. and the guilt was tearing at him at the same time. He had been in this bed the night before with two other women.. and had he been sober at the time it would never have happened.. but that was besides the point now that he could remember some of it. He groaned a bit when she licked his collar, though it was more because he was mad than anything else.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 02:09:50 02/27/06 Mon

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• Her nails raked lightly across his stomach before they rested in the waistband of his jeans, her lips kissing and her teeth nipping their way up to the side of his neck, sucking softly there for a long moment before she nipped. Her long slid up and down between his, letting out a soft breath before she used her tongue to soothe that spot she had bit. Her eyes finally moved up to his as she swallowed, her brow furrowed. "...you don't want this." She stated softly, shifting to pull away from him. By this time he would usually be tossing her clothes off and touching her somehow but he wasn't even attempting to at the moment. (NT) -- Haylie, 02:41:51 02/27/06 Mon

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• (He had been watching her with interest, frustration and confusion written in his eyes.. but when she pulled away and sat back on her heels to look at him with that furrowed expression it ate at him.) No.. it's not that.. I just.. (He fumbled a little bit with the words, running a large hand over his abs and trying to figure out how to tell her.) Trust me.. I want you.. just not - all of me - wants you. (He winced a little as he looked at her, holding the expression as he wanted with baited breath to see if she would understand his meaning or take it horribly wrong and shoot him or something. He wouldn't hold it against her.. personally in this condition he would rather just be put out of misery.. if that part of his anatomy didn't work then life was just not worth living.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 02:47:57 02/27/06 Mon

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• She frowned a little, shifting back again and running her hand over her hair, her brow knitted together as she gazed at him with confusion and a light smattering of hurt in her eyes. "I don't understand..." She murmured, biting her lower lip as she let out a low breath. She needed him so desperately at that moment, she felt like she might bust if she didn't get a release provided by him but apperantly he just wasn't interested. Could he just have stopped finding her attractive? Maybe that was the reason he didn't show up for the wedding cuz he just wasn't attracted to her anymore... (NT) -- Haylie, 03:05:47 02/27/06 Mon

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• (He chewed his lower lip as well, but it was because he was trying to figure out how to explain this to her without saying that he was afraid he had just had a severe case of erectile disfunction.. could that even happen to a man his age?) Things aren't.. (He nodded towards himself.) Working.. you know? (He rubbed a hand over his face, feeling embarassed and pained and just damned frustrated! He wanted her, his mind was rampant with thoughts about what he wanted to do to her, and his heart was racing with it.. but that part of him was just laying there.. ignoring him.) I don't.. really understand either. (he sighed deeply, averting his eyes so that she couldn't see the embarassment in his eyes.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 03:19:27 02/27/06 Mon

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• Yeah, there was definately something about her that he was finding severely unattractive at the moment so she shifted to stand, getting her hoodie and tugging it back on before wrapped her arms around herself self consciously. "Hey..no big deal.." She murmured, shrugging her shoulders a little though she definately looked dejected. "Maybe I should just go..I could make it back to my hotel in about an hour or so, no big deal." It was apparant she wasn't angry, the ice queen wasn't there, instead, this shy, uneasy girl who was afraid of his displeasure with her body was. (NT) -- Haylie, 03:29:45 02/27/06 Mon

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• (It was obvious in the way that he got that pained expression in his eyes that he hadn't meant to make her feel inadequate at all.. not by any stretch of the imagination. When she mentioned leaving, he shook his head, reaching out a hand as he shifted to cross his legs a bit.. ashamed of that part of his body.) I don't want you to go, Haylie.. I just can't.. (He growled a little, getting to his feet and pacing to the window. Why was this happening now? When he needed her the most he suddenly got a fucking conscience?) (NT) -- Kyrian, 03:46:31 02/27/06 Mon

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• She looked confused and unsure as she sat back down on the bed, huddling into the hoodie she was wearing as she rested her head back against the headboard. Her brow furrowed a little as she wondered what could possibly be going on with him. Was his subconscious so upset with her that it wouldn't allow him to be with her in such a manner? She was so confused as to what she could have done, men didn't usually withhold sex, thats what a woman did! He said he didn't want her to go but she felt so awkward and unwanted there that she wasn't sure exactly what she would do... (NT) -- Haylie, 12:10:55 02/27/06 Mon

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• (With a sigh he ran his hand back through his shaggy hair, as though the subconscious action could wipe away the guilt and shame he was feeling. His eyes refocused from the view of the loch to Haylie's reflection in the window and the sight of her haunted expression broke him. He couldn't stand there and allow her to be confused and hurt over what he was doing wrong. There was no way around it, he was going to have to tell her.) Haylie.. I did.. something horrible.. last night. (He said in a soft tone, turning his head after he spoke to look at her through pleading green eyes. He had turned this crisis into a full blown train wreck and he was just hoping to salvage what was important.) I was drunk.. and a couple of the maids came up here into my room.. I don't remember much of it, but enough to make... this.. feel wrong without you knowing. (NT) -- Kyrian, 12:24:17 02/27/06 Mon

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• Her jaw clenched at that, her brow furrowed a little as she thought it over. Kyrian was a very sexual person, he had been since she met him and she'd heard stories of how he had been before they got together. He was an attractive man and it wasn't hard to believe that some of the young maids here would be more then willing to warm his bed. She ran her tongue over her lips for a moment, swallowing softly before she finally looked up at him. "Did you use protection?" She questioned softly, her eyes on him for a long moment. She supposed it could just be the guilt that was keeping him from...enjoying her. (NT) -- Haylie, 12:40:13 02/27/06 Mon

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• (It was the guilt, and it had him averting his eyes in the same manner a dog might when it knew it was going to be punished. He felt absolutely sick to his stomach for what he had done.. it was no wonder he wasn't able to become aroused when he felt like his heart might stop beating if she were to fully comprehend what a jackass he was.) Honestly.. I don't know. (He muttered, looking at her out of the corner of his eyes for a moment, absently walking over to poke at the dying fire until it erupted into flames again, shutting the grate and turning to look at her, sadness in his eyes.) I didn't do it on purpose. (NT) -- Kyrian, 12:44:25 02/27/06 Mon

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• She took a moment before she spoke. "I..I don't like the idea of you being with other women...but I don't really have the right to be angry about it because we weren't...aren't...together..." She stated softly, her brow furrowed as she dropped her hands to rest on the comforter, playing with that same loose string she had been messing with earlier. She just didn't know how she was supposed to respond to this...the thought of him having sex with anyone else made her ache inside but for some reason the idea that it was two or more women made it a little less hurtful and more just annoying... (NT) -- Haylie, 13:01:29 02/27/06 Mon

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• (He didn't like how she had so curtly announced that they weren't together.. wasn't she getting the point that he didn't feel like they had split? That he still felt connected to her and was still trying to be faithful to her? It ached inside him to yell it at her, to ask her what the hell had happened to her to make her give up so fucking quickly on something that was so obviously right for them both. He knew the answer to that question was himself.. but even still he didn't agree with the way she had run out on him as well.. an eye for an eye never got anyone anywhere but blind. Frowning a bit, he ran his hand through his hair nervously and walked over to where she was sitting, finding a bit within himself to comfort her even in his own pain.) I'm really sorry, Haylie. (He said as he sat on the edge of the bed at her side, trailing the backs of his fingers down her arm.. he just hoped she could find it within herself to not turn him away now.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 13:05:51 02/27/06 Mon

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• Her brow furrowed a little as she looked down at the bed, thinking about him touching another woman, moaning her name, shifting and tensing as he did with her...that was all supposed to be for her. She flinched a bit at his touch since it suprised her before she cleared her throat and wiped the back of her hand over here eyes. This little announcement had pretty much killed the mood for her, no worries there about her being unsatisfied. The more she thought about it the more upset she grew until she just wasn't sure what she wanted and her head was pounding. She loved him, she didn't want anyone else touching him or being with him because he was hers and she didn't want to share him but she also didn't want to put herself out on the line as she had before with him, she didn't want to hurt like that again, she was so damn scared...never been scared of anything in her life but he teriffied her. (NT) -- Haylie, 13:19:09 02/27/06 Mon
  • (He sighed again, a dispairing sound.. he couldn't stand to see her hurting.. he couldn't bear being the one to hurt her like this again. It was all just too much for him to handle and he wanted nothing more than to gather her into his arms and to chase away the hurt in her eyes.) Please.. Haylie.. don't shut me out. (He said softly, his voice pleading with her.. he couldn't handle her leaving now, not hurt like this. Anger he could handle.. rage was okay.. but this was breaking his heart. The way she had flinched at his touch made him wonder if she didn't want him anywhere near him now, and that was even worse to think.. to never be able to touch her again would be the end of him.) I never meant to hurt you, Haylie.. I love you.. (NT) -- Kyrian, 13:27:56 02/27/06 Mon

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• The tears were welling up in her eyes again, threatening to fall. Her heart was aching so bad it was hard to breathe at the moment, she didn't know what to say or do and all she wanted to do was sink into his arms and cry herself out but he was the one who was making her cry and none of this made sense to her. A low breath escaped her lips, shaky and near tears before she looked over to him, opening her mouth to say something when all the sudden his cell phone rang. She froze at that, her jaw setting, nothing good could be coming from someone from the agency having to get a hold of him then. (NT) -- Haylie, 13:47:30 02/27/06 Mon

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• Inside -- Kyrian, 13:53:26 02/27/06 Mon
  • She let out a soft breath as she heard all of that, running her hand down her face as she took it all in. Her brow furrowed a little she thought over his question, she had gotten pretty much everything she could here and she could probably do the rest of the investigation from home to just get the reports done and whatnot. "When are you leaving?" She questioned, her brow furrowed a little. She was a uncomfortable in this room where he had been with the other girls, it made her wonder exactly what he had been feeling, what he had been thinking...what the girls had been thinking. She frowned a little, her brow furrowed as she suddenly looked up, showing her where her mind was. "Which maids was it?" (NT) -- Haylie, 22:12:35 02/27/06 Mon

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• (He was honestly engrossed mentally in the case now that he knew Shay was involved.. his baby sister was in trouble and that took over from his own pain at the moment.) Skeet said there's a flight in an hour out of Inverness, that leaves me fifteen minutes to pack up and bail. (He frowned a little.. perhaps that was why Remy had bailed on him.. he had felt the same sense of urgency to protect his wife that he felt. At her final question, he furrowed his brow and shook his head as if incredulous that she had even asked him the question when other things had come up.) Fuck if I remember. (He said honestly, perhaps too flippantly, but at least it showed he really didn't care about the girls, it had merely been opportunity presented at a moment of weakness. He moved about the room throwing his things into the black duffle at the foot of the bed.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 22:26:30 02/27/06 Mon

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• "I don't think I could be ready in time for the flight. Have to get my things from the hotel." She stated honestly, pursing her lips a little. "You could go and I could meet up there with you if you need backup or something.." She stated, her brow furrowed. Maybe it was good for him to be focused on the case instead of her, it would make him stop making her feel so damn guilty and heartbroken for him. She shifted to stand up, heading to stand by the door and put some distance between them before she shifted her weight and bit her lip, her brow furrowed as she quietly sent up a prayer that Shay was alright. (NT) -- Haylie, 23:00:19 02/27/06 Mon

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• (Since she had said the statement he had been looking at her, wondering if that was all it was going to be to her from now on.. would she have slept with him just then had he been able to and then just moved on like it was nothing? Well, he wouldn't allow that to happen.. not when it meant so much to him to have her in his life. As usual he was prepared to leave in a moment's notice, it was something Remy always stressed with him, so he had the bag ready in less time than it took for them to speak. Shouldering the duffle, he crossed the distance between them, lifting his hand to her cheek, sifting his fingers partially into her hair and leaning towards her.) This isn't over, Haylie.. nor will it ever be. (He said in a deep tone that was almost threatening, before he kissed her.. just one short but passionate kiss.. and then he was gone.) (NT) -- Kyrian, 23:07:01 02/27/06 Mon